I Am Woman Forum Independent or sumissive?

Can you be both? Should we have to choose? If so, which would you choose?

DOMINANT!!! And completely independent. I hate being told what to do. I so do NOT play that game. I am a writer. I am a Sagittarius on the Cusp of Scorpio. I am an eldest child. None of those things lend to me being very submissive.

XXOXX,
Erotic Goddess

I like to think of myself as dominant, but I know I am only in my mind. ::cry:: I've got the fiery-temper and sharp tongue, but when I'm with someone I'm too scared to do anything about being the aggressive one, and its more often I become too clingy than the other way around.

Anyone have any suggestions to curing myself of being submissive?

I say we should be both,, though being independent is better of the two and most men are attracted more so to independent women.. being submissive is just for your man.. let him think he is control for a bit.. when we all know the 'he' never is..


Chloe

I look submissive. I can come across very submissive. I'm not submissive. I always like to have the upper hand. I get what i want and if i dont i can be very moody. It's not that i'm a bitchy diva ... i just tend to know what's best for all involved... and in most cases that means me on top.

People think I'm submissive because I'm quiet sometimes. However, I am definitely not. I am independent. I mean, I hate when someone tells me what to do and I speak my mind. I have to admit, I am kind of feisty sometimes and I don't let someone walk all over me.

the only time I'm submissive, however, is when I feel extremely sad and vulnerable after a relationship. I hate that feeling....

Independent, definatly. Not domineering, just independent. Don't tell me what to do, I won't tell you what to do...

I may humbly request, though ::biggrin::

Quote:


OH! I have seen so many people have this problem. It is not an overnight change. And it starts by telling yourself that you are independent, that you are in control of you, that you can make your own choices. Learn to tell others no when you need to... Small steps!!!

XXOXX

I believe you can be both and no woman should have to chose which she wants to be, I think that is the wonder of being a woman you can be and do whatever you want whenever you want........Plus I noticed from experience men like a woman to be both..

I think some of the best dominance is obtained from understanding the submissive perspective. Hence, I would say a combination of both needs to exist.

I can do both ... it depends on my mood.

I would much rather be independent though! So much more fun ... this is my mood most of the time lol

I'm a sagittarius so that may explain it ... fiery and strong -- thats me all the way!!

I know when to be either one as the situation calls..........

I truly enjoy being both .....I get along with people so well....
because I can listen & comprimise...
I have survived cuz....I have the skills & spirit .

I can & have handled a full life all by my lil' self.....
but I know when to sit back in the wifey cut....


Blessssssssssssssss

I personally think you can be both but not at the same time.

When I'm single. I am independent as they come. When I am in a relationship I am generally the submissive one. Not door mat submissive but I tend to let the man be in charge.

Kate

Ok I am an ARIES......THE RAM...that says alot...I don't really like the term "submissive" ! I believe we all have feminine and masculine sides of ourselves which we all need to develop!!! As I grow older I find myself happier with who I am and realizing that no matter who I bring into my life, my happiness comes from within.

I am an Aries--I have learned how to hold back bc I tend to be a bit spirited, grin. When I was younger, I would take leaps and try new things--just dive into life. I was known to be independant--to find adventures, and do my own thing. I was a fighter by nature, took up causes and not afraid to speak my mind.. I stilll shake my head and wonder, how that all changed. A part of me knows--all the crap I went through, that it was safer to just shut up, hoping for "happily ever after"...trying to fix things... Never again. I am sill tough but now its like I have to make a space for my spirited nature to shine through--have to heal the past.
What I want to say is that "submissive" or "independant" what matters most is that you are chosing what is BEST FOR YOU. Don't make compromises or try to change yourself for someone else.

Love * Prayers, Lynn

I'm a Scorpio...orders don't sit well with me. I'll listen, but I must likely won't obey. I tend to do as I please when I please. BUT I try to be submissive. Living with a Sag, I get tired of hearing how stubborn I am in not such a tactful way. LOL That boy may lose his hair if he keep trying to control me. LOL But I think we CAN be both, but it is a personal choice per woman.