http://slow.writerscafe.org/evolon The original writings of author yellow devil en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776093375 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 I classify myself as an Omega Male.  It's not in the "harbinger of doom" way, at least not completely literally.  I destroy everything around myself. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1342256/ Mostly disconnected from everybody else, isolation breeds my hunger...Passion, life, control, creating, growing.  A frenzied thunder.Crashing with the force of the horsepower of life, knocking the order into a quivering mass.Frightened enough to forget the drive, so I end up back on my disorgan.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1332113/ If I let you go, you will not fall.The pain, you will soon forget it all.And as you close your knowing eyes,You'll wake to new memories in sunny skies.A fading dream of newly forgotten scenes.Replaced by truths of better things.The random face of deja vu.I walk away with my memories of you.As I pass.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1313981/ I was feeling peculiarly unoriginal today. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1311648/ I've been thinking a lot over the past few months about how I break things.  Mostly unintentionally, but there have been a few things that have been done with malice.  I have wreaked havok on people, places, and shredded items of value both sentimental and monetary.  It seems to be a .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1303502/ It's a slow killing process, but I'm trying to do.  One that requires that I do it without you.  Life gave me the challenge, and I accepted because I thought I could.  I never did things the way everyone supposed I should.  I wronged the righteous and live to tell a tale.  I.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1299888/ For everything I've done, I've always kept a smile to hide the real.  Four days ago I put the smile away and my pace at work has changed.  If not blank, which apparently looks angry, I have a seemingly determined look on my face.  Which, coincidentally, looks pissed off.  I've go.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1244208/ I think of the beaches I've been to.  One with emerald green water.  One with small shells instead of sand.  You know, ones that get into your swimsuit.  And make a sound so original when they go down a shower drain.  A soft musical reminder of the beach.  Then I think .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1234160/ Sitting on a generic couch thinking about my new “family” of dire wolves.  Weaving “jack“, my new lighter, around my fingers, remembering the smile.  I name my lighters.  I call her jack because she is white.  She’s my little Cracker jack.  My l.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1221104/ I had a small dose of familiarity.  I fell into rhythm for a week.  It caught the eye of management.  I had my tasks complete and found more to take on.  For seven straight work days I was me.  As I'd walk out of work with a sweaty work shirt, my GTL would ask me where the c.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1208199/ It’s like nothing makes sense anymore.  Regressing to a future of horrors in store.  Baptized and blessed into a life of sin.  No sign of the evil waiting within.  Deceptive smile to calm the storm.  Never letting see my true hideous form. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1191600/ I gave and knew it would never be enough.  Your light blue eyes flecked with green would always inform me of how unhappy you were.  I put the ring on your finger for all the wrong reasons...or just the one wrong reason.  I knew who you were and you knew who I was.  I can't even b.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1185188/ I do not believe it is the flames of passion burning bright, but the funeral pyre of this cursed knight. Which makes no sense because I continue so, taking the good with the bad, kicking and screaming as I go. Trying to find what fits true and correct, to mirror my soul mate and reflect. And now I.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1178913/ It’s the way life gives you a slight glance right before her cousin reality steps in and removes the curtain allowing the audience to laugh.  I will not cry.  Even though it is so opaquely apparent that I am defeated.  The veils of deceit removed and the horror of genuine care.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1174419/ My silent star bearing witness to my shame.  How I destroy and bring disgrace to the family name.  I ask you now to turn away.  Erase the memory of failed display.  I surrender attempt to find a path.  Attempting amends of my own aftermath.  The souls I've breached and .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1172901/ "Don't allow your wounds to transform you into someone you are not." - Paulo Coelho"If I'll never be loved then I'll be hated." - Otep http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1156284/ I looked up to you growing up.  Even then you'd point out my inferior abilities.  As you smiled while you did it, I figured you were joking.  I always looked forward to cub scouts and karate lessons.  I thought I would follow seeing as how you went to them.  Never happened.&.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1153045/ "Have patience, God isn't finished yet." -Philippians 1:6      "Philippians" is almost an anagram for "Philipinas".  that makes me smile http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1142314/ If you're going to bring a holy war, be ready to fight some demons.  I find myself at a very weak point in my life.  I failed many on a retardedly high level.  My work level has gone down.  A lot.  Like bad a lot.  And it's dragging me down.  If I were a phoenix, I.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1133122/ In the context of my life, I'm a broken toy, but I have a use.  The compliments and love from others only slightly slacken my self abuse.  I'm trying to find a pathway of my own without wrecking the lives of others.  So far all that comes to mind is to be alone, under my covers. .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1131545/ And I quote, "Got a twisted sense of humour, it's warped, but I didn't hit you.  I think you're finally starting to get the picture, I'm...".  It was sourced from an album I found inspiration in from another song.  Once again, I quote, "Music is my time machine, so call me".  And.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1127967/ A breath of life through glaring dark.  The action to ignite the spark.  Spraying thoughts into the air.  And leading a path of disrepair.  Lack of pride to consequence.  Triggers primal so intense.  Loose leaf mind on windy day.  Smiling a smile with nothing to sa.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1127654/ Simple actions running across the lush dirt.  Existing soaking everything in.  Memories cresting, forming waves to break.  Judge None, Choose One.  Each path an option.  None are clear.  The reasoning is more than worth it.  It is this moment that is all that matte.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1126073/ Voices murmuring,I'm still in a thickened haze.Scaling this mountain.Lying through life unaware of the days.I'm simple, singular,Fraught with fear.By reason of the treasure I witnessed,I won't let anyone near.So I bristle with anger,Cynical for a break.Knowing I will always be,.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1125207/ It's crushing me, the silence I sit in because you aren't here.For less than a year, you made my life.Subtle hints gave way to truths that should have never been told.Most would say it was well worth it, but I live unlike most.It's not a desire, a want, or even a need.It's an empty place i.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1082164/ That second chance that everybody talks about came for me late last year.A lot of people I didn't know had it all unveiled in their own little space.And at the same time that nobody saw the tears,No one will ever see the pain that was on her face.She was only mine for a blink of time.It wa.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/evolon/1075864/