http://slow.writerscafe.org/rebeccarouston The original writings of author Rebecca Hope Rouston en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776029500 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 In five days, I will have five years sober. Perspective from 2019. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2877236/ Dude, you're so fn cool. Love you. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2875691/ I feel like we’re speaking from a place of shame and fear. Just scared little kids in our beds, under the covers. Cold, alone, still waiting all these years later for our parents to tell us…you’re safe, you’re good, you’re not in trouble, you have my help. They never c.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2871142/ Hypothetical perspective of the adulterer. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2871118/ I became everything you wanted me to beAnd I did it all without you hereFour years, seven years, nearly tenBut saying hello felt different this timeI prepared myself for months to see youI thought it would be the sameYou'd wave me over and I would meltInto your arms like I was a kid againThrough my .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2860866/ Imposter syndrome http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2844702/ I'm borderline and I'm an alcoholic.No matter what anyone says, they can't take that away from me. I used to believe I was burdened or cursed because of the stigma, but where did that stigma come from? The actions of the people with the disorders. Not the actual disorder itself.Being .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2092876/ Not saying I want you back.But you are still the one. Like that's it for me. And I know I was yours, too.Maybe in another life.Goodbye, black wolf.You'll be my love, forever...always. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/2031302/ Thank you writerscafe. You've always been there like a journal. Even in my absence, I always could turn back to read how far I've come. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1886064/ i can't say how i feelbecause everytime i doi hurt someone http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1466337/ language isn't in the wordsso i cry with my eyes closednothing ever sounds righta language you should knowi shouldn't feel this scaredsend to hell any deposition is it so bad say whateverno sabotage to the missionreplay the tapes mentallythen there's so much to sayi stare in the mirror, thencomfort .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1172404/ f**k, let me goit'll set me freeit's been too long, just let me breathei've tried too hard,and felt you thinkyour lung control,won't let the air sinknow i want realityhello, open armsi've been sent this,come out unharmedyour not even greati'd never let you, theni recall your voice,hold my face again.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1163141/ I want so badly never to be heardTo live as if I wasn't completely absurdPoints in time make it hard to connectAs letters form words too hard to forgetI wake up alone and finally feel that songAll along it was different, but I wasn't wrongI can't believe I wanted to believeAcknowledging reality kill.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1125134/ I know smoking in a closed room makes me wake up sickAnd when instructed to disconnect, who should I pick?I don't exactly know why I'm constantly asked to leaveOr whether it's everything I know or just what I believeI constantly untangle my hair from dried up tears upon itThen every time I think of .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1114786/ I heard a rap freestyle the other nightOne man turned it to a cursing fightI began to antagonize him to tell me How he "saw more than we've seen"What tool is used to measure this hell?Create it, and I'm damn sure it'll sellBecause it seems the more that I seeThe more I crave to pack up and leaveThe .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1108931/ in a nutshell, i'm 20 and having realizations as i should. but there's something different about me. i see deep, then a little deeper, then i study for weeks. i embrace it. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1090433/ inspiration: humbling river by puscifer. location: coffee shop in downtown. how typical. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1090293/ your red core and world have trouble collidingand you're tired of the burn never subsidingbreathing fuels, nothing cures, holding tighterpostponing the one who will take you highermy white ribbon isn't harnessed by any meansi can give you all of me and not be who leavesyet, how your face begs me to .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1087541/ You know, I sure do think a lotI wonder about this world and whyAs time passes and we experienceWe merely learn how to get highI've learned how to sit in the coldAnd how to politely ask for a smokeI watch everyone getting olderNow we can finally take a joke Never look an outsider in the eyesOr .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1067359/ I love his disordersI find myself craving intelligencePanics come in the form of lawyersAnd comfort in his elegance I fear I just may lose itI can't find the words to tell youSeems to be the perfect fitWhen I never know what to doI don't know who I amHow can I expect this to progressI want to m.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1066279/ lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1033431/ How is it that you becameThe only man I knew with a beautiful nameThis time, I'm just so lostI need to give even when there's no costI began to feel completely aloneYou were what made a condo feel like homeThe solid platform of nineteen yearsIt's made of the same material and it disappearsMy life is.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/1017683/ Written by: Rebecca Rouston and Alex Minito http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/718191/ With the stance of a sinnerThe breath of a masterPossessing a lethal weaponAgainst the innocent by-standerI'm inhaling a liquidFeet planted down firmThe entry into subconsciousnessAway from all hereTouches with a fluidityA bachelors in deceptionI've been trained by monstersConsistent with internal r.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/698871/ life never stops movingfeels as though it robs us of timebut when it robs and we blame lifeit's simply the depression of time we losthappiness makes time flyand a longing day lasts for yearsmy mind can't move at a steady paceto where i don't need to point the fingeri love when what i've worked foris.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/621892/ Somehow I've found a way to fall in love againA man can hold my heart in his handand clench his fingers so tight to whereit completely stops beatingAnd I can feel againI can breathe after my lungs are filledwith smoke and not enough oxygento even keep consciousnessThe air h.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/537266/ i once felt this sharp pain above my kneesi had fallen in the snow and couldn't breathemy dress was torn and my shoe was brokeni realized i'd lost everything i had hoped in God was no where to be found that nightit wasn't quite yet time to lose this fightthe sky above me shown no starsand t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/512025/ changing my surroundings and moving alongdriving for hours back and fourthreplaying and singing the same songi couldn't ask for anything moreleaving this town and getting over the pasti'm scared to place my clothing in a boxi knew this was never meant to lastclosing the door .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/484232/ why are all the songs on the radioalways lyrically constructed around me and youdoesn't anyone know how to be aloneis it possible that we have nowhere to gowhat if i want to breathe separatelyi can't find myself if you're in the waythe words that i think inside of my mindare .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/479226/ dear god,sometimes i doubt your logic and embracehe's left afflictions that even you can't erasedo you think it's funny that i feel the ways i dowas it your sole intension to have me fall for him, toowhen you were thinking of girls to createyou&nbs.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/465628/ I never knew that I could love you soI don't have the strength in me to let it goPlease don't ever make me move onI won't survive the moment you're goneEvery morning will be meaninglessI won't add on another person to missYou can't stop making me feel like I matterI can'.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/465162/ i miss your face in the back of my mindi stumble without you, i'm going blindwhen i awake every morning i feel so coldi know you're someone i'd like to holdi can trust you with everything i amyou're always right there holding my handyou know i've given up on this worl.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/459574/ i once woke from a terrible dreamno one was there, it was just metears filled my eyes still closedand i could still feel it in my bonesshivering in the dark i looked for youi searched the sheets like i always dothen your lips connected to mineand i realized this is .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/448004/ i really do miss the sound of your screambefore my feet hit the ground i seethe glass stained with blood so redi wish i could get you out of my headshe said she doesn't want to be alonewith the lights out here because no ones homei wish your breath left a wound on my skinthis coul.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/440630/ to the tune of Brand New. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/437368/ Her body's cold and her teeth are clenchedSo long as there's a pulse because there's nothing leftShe lets them in and they f**k her aroundAnd moaning their name rings as an improper soundHer stomach hurts and your tears she criesBut guilt fills the body s.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/432905/ i'm so tired but i cannot sleepmy arms are cold and my knees get weaki think of her and my stomach flipsmy mind races and my center ripsi don't want to love you anymorei feel ashamed and i feel like a w***ethe bottles up and the weed is gonebut i'm still awake at the break of dawn.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/427081/ The death of many occurred this morningI could feel it behind my eyes the night beforeI knew I was leaving more behind then just my homeI just didn't know there was no way backFor days, the tears rolled down my faceAnd I saw her turn cold with the loss of her motherI gripped the back of .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/417393/ I can't believe we waited til it got this badThough tonight, I'd give anything to kiss you asleepAgain I sit here, wondering where I'll goNow that this chapter of my life has mutually concludedIt's so hard when you're not aroundWhile I'm spending my evening tearing up these pictu.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/399649/ A collage of random thoughts. It's been a pretty bad Valentine's day. I'll edit this when my mind is more collected that it is in the moment. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/376943/ Appreciate the little things in lifeBecause they can really define youAll I wanted to do was keep you wellBut there's only so much I can doWhen you're lying on the bathroom floorOr where ever you might've beenBlade in hand, placed upon your skinWere you thinking of me then?While your.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/371308/ I told you this once beforeI've actually told you this many timesI'm tired of feeling guiltyAnd I'm sick of feeling this wayI don't want to hear his nameAnd I don't like his influenceI hate his drug like affects on youI want to burn the pictures you drewI hate it when you say yo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/366340/ From the moment I saw youI knew I could like youFrom the moment I looked into your eyesI knew I could love youFrom the moment I kissed youI knew I could be with youFrom the moment I heard your voiceI knew I could talk with you foreverFrom the moment I touched your bodyI knew I coul.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/357286/ I don't know what this is, but it's not a poem. It's more of a rambling, venting paragraph cause I cannot seem to take the time now to put this into poetic words. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/353075/ I want nothing more than to see you smile.Can you look at me and really smile?I am so overwhelmed.I run into the dark where I'll be saved.Where I won't have to hurt anymore.Where maybe you won't hurt anymore.I've broken hearts with my f*****g fists.And now I'm surprised I feel so .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/337960/ Frantic chaos in my mindHolding on to me again tightly.Explain, explain, explain everything,But it vanishes in the burn of cinnamon.Night, while it cloaks my creased brows,Allows everything to spill into nonsense.My opinions may change but no one knows,Why their theories are so very&nb.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/336439/ This conflicting repetitionHolds a cycle in my mindI can't stay away from youAnd you can't help her anymoreNow we condensate the mirrorsYou, me, and her alikeFor a second there was a choiceI just wanted to hold youMy visions a bit blurred nowAnd I inhale another drag awayYet.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/330996/ Something is pushing themselves from insideEvery attack is overwhelming my mindCages and frustrating pressure, pushingWhen in the first place it's all because of meI long to see deep shades of purple appearThough my alibi makes me hypocriticalI always s.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/329534/ "And when did you stop...missing me?" - brandi carlile http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/325549/ f**k alice. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/rebeccarouston/314679/