http://slow.writerscafe.org/Sealily73 The original writings of author sea lily en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776012995 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 No, he didn’t hit meBut I wanted him to.And I’m not minimisingOr simplifyingOther forms of abuse.But when that’s all they askWhen that’s all they deem trueNo, he didn’t hit meBut I wanted him to.When he came upstairsHeaving like a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/2049989/ Lego sets in refugeiPhone torchlight Held in my hand, the Christmas lightsKelly took from the refuge tree for me.So my son could have a nightlight.Lego set they gave himA consolation prize for ending upIn what I tell himIs 'holiday home'.But I grit my teeth as we tried to bui.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1986517/ I am flattenedBy the birth of my second child.Before she sparked in my wombI stood tallAnd strong.The world was on my termsAnd I a woman of passionNot to mentionOf means.Now I see myselfIn my newVulnerability.Panic fluttering in my heartAs she nurses at the breast.Echoi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1979321/ This is how it feelsDread creeping up your throatTendrils weaving their way Into your headRendering you immobile.Panicked,Yet you floatUnencumbered, above your body.As he rages.At the universe, you,Everything.Is that your heart beating?You cannot tell.This is how it fee.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1948362/ little one,please knowi did not plan you,like your brother judahyou started as an ideaan intoxicationwhen i met your father.the man,who captured my mind and soulbefore he had even touched my body.i loved himfrom when i saw himwith his sonradiant with lovei wanted some of that loveto shine on me, too.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1881928/ i went to the baptismof the man who nearly raped me.submerged underwater, made anewpale in drugged fragilityi remember the crossi bought for himand the card"all my love..."what i remember mostwas there was a girlwho criedher face screwed up pinkglasses restingon round face.she told the crowdher love.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1860301/ he's damaged,almost broken.she's a sea creaturebeing coaxed from her shell.so many timesshe was toldshe was worthlessshe hid away.while he was dragged alongheart searednever wantingto risk himself again.they're learningeach other.lips trailing along skinfingertips along hairlinesand breathingin a si.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1776275/ it rainsand i get soaked.you open your doorachingly sweetin your smileyour dark figurea promiseof proximity.warm and inviting.i don't know if we speak.what i know issuddenly i'm with youbut i can't remember movingmy head is burrowing into your chestinhaling your scentmy mind whisperingi'm home.and y.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1768549/ i fall in love firstwith your voice, lilting and lyricalthose soft eyes that speak of dreams lostand yetstill shine.you could be the one for meyour dark bodysheltering meand my caress my mindyour soul's balm.wounded strangerlet us be freeto roam each other's heartslik.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1755365/ the kernelhas cracked open. the hollow sea shell blown back into life.the woman, resolute and wanin a crying heap on the floor. layer upon layerof protectionfinally unravelled. he says i'm not ruinedand i'm starting to believe him. because this heartdoes still fee.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1750765/ it goes like this:i sit, transfixedsolo in front of the television.i'm all alone, my sweet boyslumbering in childhood's sleepin the bed we sharelike we have since his infancy.there is a knocksubtle, almost unheard at the door.i take care not to knockmy wine glasswith bare feettread softly over.revea.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1742294/ i used to be shy,and plain.full of terror and longingsomehowyou saw meand there on the sofawe nearly touched.thighs grazingeyes hazy and drunki was eighteen then.but fully awareof the soul behind thosebeautiful,blue eyescrooked smile.the legend beingelflock, faerie knotsyouthful rebellionand you wer.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1734578/ i used to sit herein my childhood bed.writing wordsfor all the boys who laid their head...now i cradle a child, born of my bodyall fluffy hair and milk breath.i often thinki am softer as a mother.here, where i used to sit and shudderi was always the one to leave.and when you married mei wandere.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1730625/ i dreamed you up,a fairy childbriar and hawthorn.through hills we roamedyou nestled up insideheart not yet beatingbut alive.sunshine girlwho broke into beingas the bluebells began to peerthrough the winter frost.he says we must wait,wait.so i stroke my bellyand peer into the mist.dream of milk-scent.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1719297/ i saw you, today,where you spend your time (your life).still stuck working in hospitalitybut you were quick to inform mea changed man.yes, you have changedhair longer now, body language with more gravity.i remember how your handsused to shake with emotionand those overwhelming nervesyour compulsiont.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1696160/ my dad played for me,the mournful tunes of jeff buckley and eva cassidy.i listened, eyes wide.i thought then;it was the job of the beautifulto die tragically.my body is older, nowmy eyes crinkle when i smile(that nervous, woman's smileimpulsiveplacatinggood-will generating).i never managed to h.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1631926/ you held me, tightlyin the black and white nightbetween worldsher bedtheir old bedroom, postersstill taped above my head.they were beautifuland coldwe cling, and gaspeternal beings, so far apartfrom the twilight angerbitter rage.when we met,i was young, and fresh.impressionable.tell me, what part of.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1587546/ i saw your face todayand it was like the first time.that dark, peaceful countenancefull lipsfar away eyes.i saw your face todayand it was like the last time.tears pricked my eyesand i longed, to begpride aside.take me in your armsmy beautiful friend.use those strong, capa.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1560722/ you did not growin my womblittle frogsborn of lovemaking.i did not feel the flutterof your being.when you were borncut openon the operating table.no heady rushno gush into open arms.i met you sullen, heartbrokendefiant turn of chin,children half-grown.so vulnerableso completely lovable.i did no.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1552922/ maturing to womanhood,finallyat the age of twenty three.body ripe from my son,jewel in my noseimages adorning my body.when i was a girli was awkward and the wrong sizemy face red from the drinki drankto feel good inside.every movement a begsomebodyplease love me.the goddess sent three angelssma.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1548404/ you stood me up, last night,though you didn't know it.eight years since our lips last met,i remember you so well,shaggy hairbright blue eyesbicycle sweat.from troubled youth, you grewinto passionate poetvagrant anarchist.yes, i found my picket fenceyou so despisedyour father had been fenced inall hi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1548378/ lately i sit, idle,yet not idle - poisedtuned to the monitor in the kitchenand a baby's cries.then later-stroking that sweaty, suckling headfeeling the tinglingof the milk letting down.this is a new land i traversed,and brought you with me, yetyou have not been where i have been.my body is indented .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1405208/ baby boy,our eyes met and you were made.the world realignedto make a place for youand your new little storywe braced ourselves--of all the things you've given mei love this new body,filled with our lovefor everybody to see.and the moments spent togethermaking your presence knownon the surface of my .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1204759/ hello, babylittle salmonflickering life against my fingertips.your father's palm,warm and comfortingyou wriggle with joy.little motherwith birds on her breastwhere you'll lay your headthe soft, downy blond hairwish i could keep you here, safeforever. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1187246/ there's a man who loves me,in his own way.though i am nothing like the shining childof his memory.i left the housewhen he entered it again.i'll always treasure the way,you were a big brotherand not a father.i loved watching you chainsmokingand drinking coffeeinstead of watching your backalways walki.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1070791/ the thief and the heartbreaker,the pale and beaten loverthe beautiful musingsof a city wanderer.barely containing his energyhe shines so bright.the reckless youthin his sweet forgivable arrogancea loyal hearttwo fine boysi want to see the men you'll be.now i believe,in poetic memory. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1070785/ my sweet, strange companionlover-friendyou know that you raised me.took a girl just realising the compelling powerof femininity.hid her in the peaceful canopyof your bed.relaxed the neuroses and anxietylike a drug.riding down the sidestreets with youon bicycles in the autumn chill. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1043790/ i want him to know the inside of me.kiss the spot beneath my ear,concealed from viewand tug gently on my hair.want those eyesarrestingand touches, lingering.in the grassand in the depths of the sheets.erasing memorythe firm grasp of his handin dark cornersand those long walks home.i want to stroke t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1043774/ he saysdo self portraitsin sepialike youbrown and plain.i hated you then. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1026436/ young girl,absent father,my mother said;'you never got any attentionas a child.'a reckless teen.and now i've foundthe boys i meetare so good to me,the ones who found me on the way.they're big and strongwith callused handsthat stroke my hairand hold my hand.i lean my head on their shouldersat the end.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/1006678/ my girlfriendran away to university.to the coastand lived with strangers.we travelled to see her,three wild girlsfresh from the city.they took us to the townwe drank and dancedi kept rebecca's lipstickin the bag i always heldwhile she danced,free.i dreamed i could be so beautifuli wanted to be-we ca.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/987680/  1) tattoo fetish2) artist moves in with her, cat shit3) matt and his mum4) lukas5) sophie and marcin6) mark and his wife - abuse, jail1) It was hot, it was summer, and her thighs stuck uncomfortably to the table. She knew her soul was bad, knew the serpent that lay dormant had risen again.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/940161/ you are;mint, sage, lavender, rosemary.in that little tinyour mother gave youto heal your hands(artist's hands)remember whenyou used to slide it in your pocketbefore we venturedinto the icy winds.i bought one,carried itlike a talisman. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/888780/ my cat prowlsaround her domainstopsto scratch.she, like me,begs for attentionwith head buttsand wide-eyed pleadingcurls upon record sleevesand stares across the room.often to be foundsleeping in the cupboardon my boyfriend's old t-shirtsor else in the laundry basketcurled upin dirty towels.she eats .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/841107/ for jaya, because she asked. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/830084/ He finishes, rolls over. Peels off the protection they were using and slings it in the wire paper-basket. He grins sleepily and his arm hooks around her waist protectively, drawing her closer. She has to pee."I'll be right back," she says, and extricates herself from the tangle of limbs. Padding slo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/822591/ when the first burst of passion fades,we have to de-flea the cat.and i have stomach painswe clean the toiletwe hoover up.i remember the morningslike they were in sepiaand you brushed the hair from my eyesinstead of smacking my arsegood morning.i love you i love youand the jealousy still echoesher na.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/801115/ i was jealous of laura because my boyfriend loved her. i want her blonde hair, her heavily-mascara-ed eyes - i wonder what she looks like in the morning? but she's so lovely. i can't carry on a conversation with her, but she worked in starbucks. beyond; 'hi, what have you been up to?' she's off in t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/792481/ i consider myself to be rather grown-upand above such things.even if we did buy a record playerbefore cutlery.and the girls in high-schoolhave all had babies.i wish i were them.it used to be: photo albumsor yearbooks:"you're so great! xoxo"now it's thousands of imagesof bad haircuts,spots that laste.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/791867/ i'm the catcurled up on your knee.we strugglebecause we don't kiss like we used to.we've perfectedmaking love so wellwe should high-five at the end. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/788412/ we moved to an atticwith a skylight and a view of the brothel.in the blinding sunlight,you kissed me.we got a kitten,and we chased her through the three rooms.she cried at night outside our doorbut purred under soft caress.in my dreamsyou asked me to marry youwith a ring as big as an orchid flower.t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/784191/ 1. your children.i have never met oskar, your little boy. i know a few things about him:he is two years old, accidentally conceived at the end of your marriage.he has eczema, and can't have dairy.he's moody.i know lots about hubert. he likes me. i think this is because whatever little children want .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/761381/ i am not afraid of ghosts,except for the oneswho have your babieswith your eyes and nose and smile.and the other womenwho did not yell out during love,or cry.i am afraid of the words you printed over,agnieszka, agnieszka.i hear it in my sleep.and if i were her,i'd be fighting to have you backwith th.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/748812/ a man came round todaywith tattoosand a red letter.it said you owed900 pounds to the governmentand they were taking everything.i live herebut my things are not your things.what have they to dowith ponds cold creamand evelyn rose perfumeor the mugs i stole from my old work?you've opened my eyes to so.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/735514/ ecstasy, and then:"s**t."we have to get youThe Pillhe spoke ominouslyragged of breathand red in the faceour bodies still stuck togetherwith sweat.sorryinside thereclinging desperately to me.we have to expel youbefore you get his eyes.and i cried.because this is not the right time to say:i want to be.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/712995/ i am forgetting your faceand your odd twists of phrase.the way you'd relunctantly say,'you're very sweet'like you were abovethe raw sentimentalityi held on display.and the taking--with roxanne playing in the background.but nowi am becoming himand the way he smells when he sleeps.the soft noises he m.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/710564/ i wasn't expectingheroics.and love is this--working for a wage minimally paidand washing breakfast and dinner dishes.scrubbing the showerwith fairy liquid.a spider lurks in his (our) bathroomand i track the slugsthrough his (our) bedroom.they got into my boots.i saw my grandparentsand they said to m.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/700530/ what do i think?well i don't write so much anymore. my words cannot help but be loving-- and tentative. a relationship that swept me up before i had finished grieving the others. but he wants me here. he wants me here, all the time. i have furniture, films, books and magazines. numerous jars of diff.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/699200/ you scrawled your storyacross your wallsand they pounce out of the paintin the sunand the lamplight(which you made me choose--decorating your hometo bring me closer to you.)but i am scared of your ageand your childrenfive and two yearsmade in your mold.and desperately scared ofthose slavic womenwith.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/699198/ he wears a silver chain around his neck when he makes love.and the sun casts shadows(we're making shadows too.)fill mewith the odd sensationof jealousy.there were many others in this bedbefore me.i want to be the last one,but we always thoughtwe'd be the last one.let mebe http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Sealily73/692848/