http://slow.writerscafe.org/XLostShadowX The original writings of author Ghost Writer en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776062890 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 It starts with hello and before you know you’re tripping over words and your heart is skipping before you can get a hold of your tongue the words come tumbling out and you stand there holding a breath you didn’t realize you had even caught as the three words hang in the air or sit on the.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/2767463/ It starts slow, you don't even realize that it’s happening. You stop combing your hair and blame it on the rush you were in to leave for work or school.You stop taking your medications, and blame it on forgetting to pick them up from the pharmacy.You stop taking your time to sing and thin.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/2119382/ There is no sound in space, there is only silence outside of your space craft.But it's different when you are sitting in your room staring into space and feeling your fragile heart break, and you can hear every word they say about you isolating yourself because you have had enough http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/2038784/   Today is October fifteenth 2007, today Max would turn twenty six. It's been four years since Max died. Four years and three hundred sixty three days since I almost jumped off of a building. Three days I've been on life support because my systems are failing. Two months since my medicines.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937941/       Max died on May twenty second at 11:36b am in a dumb brightly lit, overly cheerily painted hospital room full of flowers that I brought to him.      The last time I walked into his hospital room, he smiled sadly with a small spark in his tired eyes,.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937936/     The last time Max was in the hospital I brought him a different kind of flower everyday. The room was full of orchids and roses and lilies and daisies and snapdragons. He would blush every time I walked into his room and pull me into a weak hug when I was beside his bed.  &nb.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937925/      Yesterday I finished making a dog safe birthday cake for Frankie. Frankie is four and Max should be twenty three, only eighteen months younger than me. Doctor Evan told me that I could call him today if I need to, but that was before I got pissed and called him a dick two da.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937920/          I used to watch Max smoke, it was like art to me. He would delicately hold the cigarette between his fingers and light it carefully, then set it between his soft pink lips and let his eyes fall shut as he hollowed his cheeks and pulled the smoke into .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937909/      Max decided that him and Frankie would share a birthday, their birthday is October fifteenth. Since we got Frankie, I have made two cakes one for Max and one for Frankie. It's going to confuse Frankie when there's only a cake for him and not one for his daddy. I'll buy a pre.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937900/   Max wanted to get a dog when he was younger but his parents would never let him have one because he didn't do his chores regularly, the thought a dog would be too difficult for hi to keep an eye on all the time. When Max turned eighteen he moved out of his parents' house to come live with me,.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937894/       I'd like to think that when I die someone will care, someone will be there to miss me because they couldn't imagine living a day without me. There's no one left to miss me, Max is gone and he's all I had. My parents probably don't even know I'm still alive if they are,.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937892/    My favorite coffee is from a little café that me and Max lovingly nicknamed Mugged, he would always call me on his way back to our house and say with a chuckle, "Baby, I got mugged." It used to drive me crazy, I was always worried that something would happen and he'd get hurt wal.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1937886/ You are meant for more than silver against your skin,You are meant to be a true love.A best friend.You are a cure against their poisons,A saving hand for others who can't take anymore.You are not your pills or a diagnosis,You are not your scarred wrists and bitten down nails.You are no.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1933221/ I am a wilted rose,There's a sort of beauty in my dying.My death was inevitable, To some it's heartbreaking but to others it's artistic.I suppose there's something romantic about a dying rose,I somehow get more beautiful as I fade away.I am a wilted rose.Once when I was perfect I was given by a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1931300/ He isn't a dick really, he just knows the exact thing to say to piss me off. Probably some s**t to test my patience, he thinks I'm a bi- polar schizophrenic. I'm not, I'm just a regular schizo with a short temper. These doctors are going to diagnose me until I'm reduced to a padded room and a truck .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1930057/   Two months into therapy when I was actually talking to Doctor Evan my therapist, after a s**t ton of psychological tests I was told that I am schizophrenic and that "they" aren't real. Doctors have given me thousands of drug screenings to make sure that I didn't hallucinate from being under t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929748/   Max had a way of making me feel like the only person in the world, I guess maybe to him I was. The only person who would pick up the phone at any time or wake up at ungodly hours of the night to listen to him talk, because I knew he would make me smile just by letting me hear his voice. You n.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929732/      After Max was better we started working and going to school like we had been, it was like nothing had happened except for he was taking more pills even though he said they all made his soul feel trapped. He said he only took them so that I didn't have to miss him, when he go.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929731/   Max always warned me about how important the truth is in a society full of liars, every time I thought about lying or would think about lying I would think about Max and feel guilty as hell. Sometimes I would write down all the lies I heard or avoided telling and set the paper on fire. When M.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929730/ Kinda short, I separated the chapters weird http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929713/    There's always a calm before a storm, so you do your best to prepare for the worst. And you think you'll be okay but sometimes, no matter how hard you try, you can't predict what's coming next. And you get hurt. None of us could have predicted what would happen next. None of us could ha.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929711/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929710/ You can't make yourself forget what you never wanted to remember,You can't pretend that you aren't afraid of your future.Try to push away what you don't want to feel,Turn a blind eye when you start to see what's real.Pretend as you might you'll still be nothing,Because no one likes someone who knows.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929708/ It doesn't matter if you're happy or not,You are lucky to be alive and have chances that other people don't.Do you even realize how many people are dying? How many are starving?They're just wishing that they could have a taste of all the things that you are ungrateful for. There are two kinds of peo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929702/ You know you're killing the planet right?You know that just by being alive you are destroying the only place you are able to live,You throw things away and you fight with people and you ask for things you don't need.All the earth was trying to do in the beginning was give something the chance to exi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929698/ The thing about life is, you have to make mistakes.You don't really make your own decisions,Your mind and consciousness aren't sophisticated enough to process decisions.We are all predetermined to make good and bad and life changing decisions. When you think on something, all you are doing is pickin.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929695/ Talk about it but you'll never be heard,Speak in hushed tones,Depression is a dirty word.Pills,Hard to swallow,Leave a bitter taste in your mouth.Pick up a bottle and drink with the crowd,Take a hit from the joint being passed around.Don't worry just drink when the voices get loud,.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929694/ It's kind of cool that at one point someone was doing everything for you, Now you are your own person.Look how far you've come, How much that you've done for yourself.Think of what you have done that people said you couldn't, Things you will do when people say you can't.When you were born.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929680/ Through an open window I see, The beautiful thing far away from me.A man following a girl into an alley,Her walking back out dragging his dead body.Small children sitting dirty and beaten,Jump from hiding chasing wealthy people so that they may start eating.Dying flowers in cracks on the sidewa.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1929677/ Not entire story, if I get good feedback I'll add more http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1811322/ Date a poet, I will remember everything. Date a poet, I won't break your heart. Date a poet, I'll write you a way through tough times. Date a poet, I see small details.Don't date a poet, I'll want to be alone. Don't date a poet, I'm always writing so.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1811320/ Your glare means nothing,I can glare back.Your blue eyes,Crystal as glass.I've been trying to get your attention,But you aren't worth my time.A glance in my direction means nothing,A stray smile and I could care less.You don't deserve the love I wanted to give you,I don't deserve the pain you show m.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1811317/ Mirrors and pictures aren't accurate depictions of what you look like to everyone else,It's a warped image seen with a piece of glass.You can never really see how you look through someone else's eyes.No two people see you the same,One may notice a rainbow of colors in your eyes while another notices.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1811316/ She's the life of the party,But she's dying inside.Hell of a smile,She's wanting to cry.Passing around bottles of whiskey and gin,Waiting in vain to pass out again.Choking down pills,She's losing her mind.Just like he wills,She finally cries.Pushing through bodies to get out the .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1666324/ I will scream,They can't see me cry.Take me down,I'll still be fine.I've been pushed past my breaking point,But I've risen back to my feet.When these wounds heal,I'll still have scars on my back from your knife.I can take the blows,Just not your lies. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1646017/  My darling please put the blade away,For once please listen to what I say. The blade won't heal you,Put the sharpness down. If you slit your wrists and reveal a battlefield,The blood that drips won't heal you. Put the sharpness back, Open your eyes. Don't cry please dry you.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1576703/ To be continued? http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1566071/ "Can I help you Hun?" the receptionist asks,smiling welcomingly at Dominik. "Yes ma'am, I'd like to go see my boyfriend,"Dominik tells her, his voice cracking. "I need a name Hun," she tells him, still smiling. "Derek Jameson," Dominik answers, attempting to smile back. "Go on back Hun, room.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1494066/ "Why are you such a b***h?"Alexis screamed at Rachel, tears starting to pool in her eyes. "I'm not," Rachel said, cooly crossing her arms over her chest."Yes, you are. To me, to your family, to everyone else. Oh my gosh I swear it's like you can't stand people being happy," Alexis yelled a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1490601/ Don't take the pills, don't drink the potions. They are trying to rewire your brain to make it how they want it, they want to change you. You being depressed isn't okay in their eyes, but making you choke down pills and drink their potions. I know as well as you that this new person isn't you. You w.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1488107/  Why do I write?  Honestly I don't know why I try. I guess it just feels like a release, you guys can have an insight into my life. I don't know why my parents scream so much, I mean I'm not a bad child. I have breakdowns every now and then when I cry and fight, I push every.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1481270/ The first time I met Caleb West, I felt attracted to him. Maybe it's the way he made me laugh, or the way he smiles, or his confidence in me and himself, but I'm almost sure it's the way he makes me feel. Whenever I'm with Caleb I feel happy, like I am floating and I feel invincible like I can do a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1476913/          "You hear the names they call you behind your back, you hear the whispers in the locker room. You are so tired of people judging and labeling you, so tired of the heart ache and pain. You hate the looks you receive for loving who you do, for bein.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1470417/ Once apon a yesterday I sawthe most beautiful face, with the kindest heart and loving arms. I said helloand was greeted with a hug and the most gorgeous of smiles. Magnificent greeneyes had me hypnotized, I wanted to lose myself in those eyes. I care not aboutthe physical appearance but .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1459327/ WHY DO WE FALL IN LOVE SO EASILY WITH THE THINGS,PEOPLE, AND PLACES THAT WE CAN'T HAVE. KNOWING THAT THE PAIN OF NOT GETTINGWHAT WE WANT WILL STAB THROUGH OUR HEARTS LIKE RAZOR BLADES SPLITTING OURWRISTS, LETTING THE DEMONS INSIDE OF US POUR OUT. PUTTING OUR BROKEN HEARTS ANDTORN SOULS O.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1459325/                 When you smile at me I smile back and can't stop,                Whenyou cry my smile fades and my heart drops.&nbs.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1459317/ Continuation of true love. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1449373/      She was beautiful to me, from the second I laid eyes on her. I knew she couldn't stand me, but I was drawn to her. The more she pushed me away, the closer I got the harder she pushed. She had no idea how persuasive and determined I am. Finally after three years of .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1449363/ Everyone has that one person that they hate more than anyone, more than anything and in some cases it's themselves. You shouldn't hat yourself, you are special , unique, one of a kind. You might know people  who drink, party, smoke, have excessive amounts of sex, or even do everything righ.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1447695/ This isn't really a poem more like an uplifting short explanation http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/XLostShadowX/1412070/