http://slow.writerscafe.org/95millerk The original writings of author Poe Met Emily en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776027321 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 reflectionItstared me in the face day inand day out, reminding me of whatI was walking towards, though somethingwasalways sneering at my teeth,slapping my cheeks weakly,and yet impacting everything;mymind, all that I was, even my leftoverheart. I still looked in those puddles.But her eyes reminded m.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768357/ there, at that homely prisonI was to remove myselffrom the place I had longed to leavewithin twenty-four hours,with no place to go, no hope left in my bones,and a false sense of love to cling to.I dragged my feet, heavy with cement,encased in the cold water that reminded me of my chest,enc.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768356/ it had only beena couple of months thathe and Ihad been dating,a couple of months ofunremittingsneaking around,begging toleavethe house,secretly to seehim;where we spent our timewriting music,talking vaguely,never sharing a kiss,only fumbling fingers,barely intertwined.It had only beena couple of mo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768355/ in the rainI was becoming so smallin such a big, big world.I was a balloon that a kidlost hold of,drifting to death without a care. I was this fragile piece of glassthat my Mother could spit onor manage to polish with words,just a glance to crack my exterior. My lip swelled between my teet.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768354/ mother saidIf you don’twant to be apartofthis family,thenyou need toleave. Ican’tdealwith the stressanymore,letalone your Fatherright now. Ifyougo,there is nocoming back,nohelp you canget fromus. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768353/ one eveningTime began to slow and fly by at once,this helter-skelter poisonthat killed in the milliseconds it tookto breathe. I dragged my feet that evening,skipping stones inside my mind.Night had hung over, my eyes staring into the puddlethat awkwardly stared back.My hand shook around my.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768352/ leaving the bathroomI heard the bell ring as loud as a gongas he ripped into me, angry gnashing teeth about my attitude, my disobedience,that it was his house,his rules and as long as I lived there,I had to abide by them. If I wanted to act unruly,then I needed to leave. I was old eno.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768351/ if I was goingto break, it had to be hidden,easily, by clothing; behind the ear like poison ivy,or the top of my feet, worn like socks; my ankles like jewelry,my a*s that no one ever grabbed; the front of my waist where no eyes lingered,my breasts, small as paper cuts; the innerm.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768349/ voices in my headwhispering that If I make any cuts,it’s back to an institution. You’re not part of the familyif you go back,my older brother saidto disown me. I wouldn’t stop until I made a hundredand if I lost count, I would start again. But I didn’t want it .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768348/ at this homely prisonAs my twin and I made itto the side street our housesat on, over the front porchwhere a few of my belongingsnow sat, where the back doorstood ajar, Father stoodwaiting. Like a tower looming,such fury in his hands,my heart tightening inmy chest as my handsbegan to shake,hewa.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768347/ stupidI should have ended it there,but I was desperate to hold onto someone I thought that loved me.Butterflies and frilly thoughts, flowers raining across my eyes.I knew it was stupid to think he actually loved me when he just went off and stuck histongue down other girls throats,&nb.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768346/  he said Live, you make me want to be a better person,to admit when I’ve done something wrong,to learn to not be selfish,to be someone different. But he kissed girls and boys like he smoked pot,enjoying his wants in his pajamas. He licked their lips like he drank whiskey,se.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768345/ on my birthdayI had thought todaywould mean I was free       from watching my body float upstream       from watching my blood swim down the drain       from smiling and pretending     .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768344/ it started offas a stupid joke,a degrading, mindless joke.My chest would stumbleeach time he coveredhis bite with a giggle. But that tiny prickling noisewould slowly fade and beforemy heart could recover fromfaltering and floundering,anxious and trembling, his joke became my name.B***h. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768343/ but I wasHappy then,skipping home when I wasout of his sight,my ballet heart dancingwith the excitement ofwhat I thought was love.I’m nota good person.I’m horrible.No, he was just beinginsecure, just beinghard on himself,Looking at who he wasthrough the wrong angle.Just as I would do.Jus.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768342/ I washis first girlfriend,but not his first relationship.He liked men too,and I was no one to judge,a closeted bisexual myself.But my skin prickled at his words,that he had never kissed a girl.He had had boyfriends before,a long winding, twisting, scavengingrelationship that ended poorly,yet he want.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768341/ when I asked him outWe sat under a tree, the summer heatbeating on my back, his eyes lingeringover my freckles like honeythat dripped in lazy motions. The shade fell aroundthe empty playground as a blanket,comforting from the sweltering heat;the yellow rubber swings paddling like ducks in .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768340/ in retrospectIt’s been solong now that Iforget whyI liked him. Maybe it wasthose emerald suffocating eyes,pulling me in and spitting me outlikechewed up gumhejustcouldn’tlet go of.The melody of hisvoice ringing in my ears, pleasant,memorable when he would sing.Or was it simplybecause we .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768339/ time passedI sat outside in the summer heat,munching on fries as Iwatchedcars zoom past, seagulls’swoop around, and listened tomysister ramble about our shacklesand relative, momentaryfreedom.I frowned, nodding along, knowing it would be short lived likealways.No matter how much I wanted .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768338/ when it was overI didn’t cry like I thought I would,no heavy tears or fragile breaths.I wondered if I was dead inside,this creature with a sorryexcuse for a heart.Or I was just accepting that I was foolish and knew deep down it wouldn’t last;that while he was away,I mourned him.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768337/ break ups were too easyeven for my first summer relationshipwhere I waited for him for a year later.My heart wasn’t broken but it did ache.I genuinely liked him.I knew it would end eventually,that I’d be the one to pull its thread,unravel it and crotchet it into a faint memory. I&rs.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768336/ my routine was defensiveand I liked it that way.I’d wear my clothes like armor.Whose funeral are you dressed for?Dr. So and so says you needto wear brighter colors.Dr. So and so says…Dr. So and so says...I hated bright colors.Yellow just pissed me offbut daisies made my day.I’d dr.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768334/ back thenI lived in a small ranch house,one block from the deep blue sea,a place I often was tempted to wade intoand never return from. The cold water reminded me of my chest,the conditioned warped love of my nuclear birthersas she whispered for me to join the earth.She wanted me to come home, .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768333/ outsideI was there, watching my skeletondance in the summer heat,blissfully unaware of whatawaited me, of what wouldhaunt me for so long.Unable topush the heat frommy blood and into the ground,I knew what I wanted.I didn’t know how tofight themthe same way or how tokeep them--those unreco.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768332/ constantMemories played like a reelas they’re caught in themotion of repeating, skippingover and over and over.I’ve scratched at themwith a rusted penny,scraping awaythe color of their eyes,the shapes of their faces,and dragged long linesthrough their bodies.I’ve made them unrecogn.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2768331/ the mirrorIt stares me in the face day in andday out, before and after everyshower, reminding me of what Icouldn’t escape. It stillwasn’tquite right from the beginning andmocked me every step of the way,though I chose to ignore it out ofwhat I thought was love. It easedit's slimy an.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2163644/ A trauma memoir written in a non-standard format. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2163643/ I laid on the medical bed clutching my stomach. A sharp pain pushed to the surface. I kept my eyes closed, asking the doctor's to removed whatever the cause was.I looked at my bloated stomach, the fear washed away instantly. Like a deflated balloon with an object inside, I could see her.The small in.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2012171/ My heart beginsto ache and throbwith the paranoiathat history isrepeating itself again;that my own mistakesare mistakes he'll make,but then if it happens,who am I to feel?Who am I to saythat he shouldn't do that?Is it fair for me to feelhurt and betrayedif another girl holds his attentionmore than I.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2009778/ I didn't understand the words coming out of my mouth, but his face twisted and his nose wrinkled. He was trying not to cry. He was so much smaller than me, the size of a four year old, instead of his average six foot height. He was thin and naked. My heart began to swell as tears pushed past my eyes.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2004526/ Don't you think we should be closer?Loneliness engulfs my mind,my heart sinking deep beneath my stomach.You're here but you're not here.I keep latching onto the comfort of death,only to shutdown and even lie about it all.I have never enjoyed life.You were once a force that drove me,to be better and .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2002100/ I come to you, to seek your help.You, and your white coat.But every word I speak is easily dismissed.I tell you, "I am sick."You say, "It's in your head."I weep from piercing pain,that moves from the right to the middle;the hunger that I cannot satisfy,the long days and nights of emetophobia.I .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/2001005/ I have a life themeof drowningin traumaWaves of fearcrashingdownI keep whisperingthat I willbe moreNo victim hereNo girlOnly feelings http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1988926/ Every time I close my eyes,there you are, whispering in my ear,"It's your fault. It's your fault."I try not to weep,and I cannot even escape you in my sleep.I keep begging God to ease the pain,but even He is quiet and turned away.I barely breathe, barely eat,and I remain shackled and weak.I avoid sp.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1988433/ He had me under his thumb, broken to mold however.He fed me lies to live upon, or seek death to escape it.He told me I helped him, but all I can seeIs that I held him back from himself,Held him down; but abused and neglected by his hand,I was told too much in error, to unfold and breakEven more for .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1987809/ Wonder-less, breaking by the stroke,I've got a limit to this, one I've already broke.Am I black or am I blue?Flightless, never am I to join you.High in the summer sea,Stealing my breath with such ease. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1987759/ I found the seeds of pain and resent the roots well embedded.The lights that made me grow in the lonely beheaded.A trickle of water to expire at my touch,Watchful eyes that never close, never enough.Could I be replanted in cotton, milk, or honey?Bloom into something tasteful and desiring?Should I re.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1987758/ I accidentally overheard my heart talking to my mind.She said she was losing herself in the race against time.I shut the door and closed the shadesWondering where my thoughts really go when they fade.Sweet words trickle in and out when she's screaming,But my mind isn't satisfied, circling for the me.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1987756/ Create within the leftover fibers of my skinSomeone more beautiful, a prize for you to win.I have been burned and resented by my blood,The family I had loved for so long, so good.Showed me the way to manage disfunctionality,Hide inside my seamless shell, cloak the reality.I keep shoving it away, suc.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1987175/ Butterflies weep crystals across the sunset.I stand on a ledge, divide within myself.I would be a death to hang aroundwhen all I have felt has been down.You are so far from my hands,so much further for me to understand.Am I looking at invisible walls,wondering how they will fall,or am I standing fur.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1987174/ I cannot breathe so easily,clawing at the vice around my neck.My chest is pounding, aching,and my vision blurs.Please, I can beg if you want.Please, I can become weak.Please, I can die here.A white knuckle fist,my eyes grow wide, watchingin slow motion as you draw closer.I think so quietly, "This wi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1987133/ We once clashed and yet flowed,able to bring love into each other's lives.Here, I await your slumber each day just to say Hello, I love you.Here, I ponder if you're going througha darkness without telling me.Closed off and guarded,you keep me on my toes of wonder.It's been years and I still fee.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1985515/ Disabled.I won't tell you the reason why.I won't tell you how I got to this point.And I won't ever feel free.The patterns,the cycles,the meltdownsThey're all normal to me now.But if I tell you,Then I am made weak,vulnerable,and misunderstood.Beneath this, I am strong,fighting,and waging war though I.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1984851/ I'm not happy.It's that simple,or so it seems.I keep my eyes open wide,hoping to catch a sightof what happiness may be,if in this labyrinth of mindI could figure out what ends meet.Here, in this playing field,connections break and reignitein odd patterns and complex wiring.I am ill, though I don't s.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1967472/ I feel like I'm eating airunsatisfiedin discontent.I'm still lookingblindlyfor my calling.I'm still wonderingif it's worthlooking for.Will my hunger besubduedor everlasting? http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1967451/ He was all I was used to, mean and cynical.Along you came, breaking in with your smilesThe calm tone of voice, and the sweetest kisses.You saved me from death, my prayer answeredBut I have memories and scars from himThat you’re slowly healing.But I have no clue how to h.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1948447/ Moments come and go, dragging the day forwardbut beneath this skin, I drown slowly.I have no spark, ambition, or purpose.The sun drifts through the sky as we spin,yet, here I am, wandering through my mind.I have labels, stigmas, and a lack of confidence.Where will I be before my next birthday?Will I.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1948415/ You're the black hole in my soul.You suck the life from my heart,paint a scenery of mockery,and leave with my energy.Ticking like a bomb,I've got nightmares to fill the universe.This was not enough.I was not enough.Now he tries to heal me.But I am running into the darkness,the corners where you lay... http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1671984/ Come rain on my paradeCause I want to feel it.Come push me over the edgeCause my head is in overdrive.I think we're different.I think we're doomed.You're a vampire.So take my heart,I hand it over willingly.I thought you were doomed.I thought you were different.I'm a corpse sent on death row.You're d.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1671983/ You were so strange to meIn your purest form of beautyA delicate fathom of lightSo foreign against the nightI was lost in your shineUnsteady hands for someone to guideDid I hurt you, make you bleed inside?Such shame to my lifeIt grows under a false sun of constallationsA broken record of songs by fi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/95millerk/1471880/