http://slow.writerscafe.org/Detective%20Watts The original writings of author Detective Watts en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776042359 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 An adventure through Time, Space and a selection of afterlives. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/825809/ The story of how Mankind reached the stars and what it did while it was there. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/767776/ It's for a competition. Sorry. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/756093/ The Gallant Gents of Gatsbury, Act One.In which the Gallant Gents incur the rage of a mob of Frenchmen and proceed to befuddle them most thoroughly. ‘So the Rabbi replied, “I shan’t fletcherise the Priest lest Sir Chazwozer gets impugned!” It was a jolly good coron.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/739965/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/739964/ a mansits alonein a roomending his lines completely arbitr-arilyhe doesnt capitiliseor sort his “poem” into stanzascause hes to modernand misunderstoodfor s**t like thathe swearscause hes politically incorrectbefore using a metaphorthat doesn’t make much s.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/736527/ Later that day, Neo got better from the zombies because he had Panadols.“Yay!” said Neo. “Now I am better and will have a very goodly story to put on the internet” He wrote Batman was there but then a jaywalker happened.“Why you jaywalk!!!” s.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/732404/ Neo was at the computer making a very goodly story for the internet.“I am at the computer and my story is very goodly” he said.But then Zombie Bella and Zombie Dumbledore and Harry Potter were there.“Why are you here instead of in Harry Potter world.” Said Neo.“.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/731854/ “Look out Edward!” said Bella. “There are zombies!!!”Edward turned to face the zombies, his sexy muscles rippling with rage and sexiness.“You zombies! Go back where you came or I will kill you with my sexy muscles and awesome hair!!!”But the zombies did not .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/731851/ Edward has sexy muscles and sex with Bella and Jacob. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/731831/ Not an artistic name. It really is unfinished http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/731139/ Hey, this is gonna be a semi-semi regular thing, where I make funof J.R making fun of bad stories. This little gem is a critique on a pile ofawful called “The Horrible Bloody Death of Kairi”. With a title like that, atleast he knew what he was getting into.  .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/724693/ “Doctor Watson, I presume?”Watson hesitated a moment, stunned by the man’s appearance. Freakishly tall, his gaunt figured was covered by a black, hooded cloak; leaving only a thin sliver of his sickly pale face discernable through the shadows.“Uh, Alistair Crowley?”.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/723990/ Deep within the vast and lifeless void of space, hidden from the Earth by the shadow of the moon, strange creatures, alien to our world; silently plotted the downfall of Man. Using a science strange to our race, the terrifying beasts subtly began to unwind the very fabric of time and space .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/721680/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/721679/ Jack the Ripper, dagger in hand, slowly, silently crept through the dark streets of London; ever careful to avoid the diligent gaze of El Nacho and his elite squadron of shoemaker hunters.“Curse that damnable Detective and his Hispanic cohort!” The Ripper said. “Now, not even my .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/706382/ Deep in the slums of Whitechapel, hidden by the dark and fog of the night, a menacing figure silently watched as Detective Watts and El Nacho began to unravel his horrific crime.“Another murder” Watts said as he lit his pipe. “And yet again, Jack the Ripper has left us no witness.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/703797/ The Heroic Exploits of Detective Watts: An Exciting Adventure Through Space, Time and The Seven Planes of Hell “Stop!” shouted Detective Watts as he pursued the villainous Baron von Borl through the streets of London. “You have nowhere to run!”“Nowhere?&rdquo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/703796/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/703795/ I cannot describe this http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/690829/ Something I saw in the bathroom. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/686048/ “If I could collect data from opposite ends of the Earth, I should be able to use it to triangulate the Invaders’ fleet’s position”Combobulous paced back and forth, across his lab, as he spoke aloud to himself.“But it’s too far. By the time the data reaches me.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/681092/ “Curses, foiled again.”Deep within the invaders space-craft, Emissary Drake watched as his advanced alien weapons systems deflected harmlessly off of Professor Combobulous.“Jeevesworthingtonsworthingpennyshiretonberryngton!”he called out, summoning his butler to the room... http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/680914/ “Combobulous? You’re early. Come in, come in.”The Prime Minister opened the door to his spacious, Scottish estate; letting the Professor and his faithful butler Jeevesworth in.“Can I offer you some brandy then?”“No Prime Minister. Not now. This is urgent.&rd.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/679580/ “Great Scott!”Professor Combobulous took a step back as a mushroom cloud burst through the surface of his bubbling chemical concoction.“I think I’ve finally done it. After all these years, I think I’ve finally harnessed the awesome power of the atom.”The pro.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/679563/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/679562/ “This one’sstill breathing”A GalacticFederation marine, who was called a marine despite not having anything what soever to do with water, kicked Asimov over on to his back.“Get a medicup here”“Cough,cough” Asimov coughed a mouthful .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/676786/ “Stop rightso fast.”CaptainAsimov burst, phaser readied, into Lord Greystalks hidden moon base; just asthe aristocrats villainous plan neared fruition.“Ah, Asimov,so you’ve finally arrived”Greystalkcackled maniacally and turned to face his vali.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/675933/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/675930/ TheInvader's general was angry. He was very angry. He was very angry becausethings were going very wrong and, ever since he was a child, things going verywrong had made him very angry. Things usedto be going very well and that had made him very happy. The Earthlings werescat.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/665116/ (A reboot ofthis http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/589909/but you don’t really need to read. It makes sense without. Or, at least, no less sense.) DetectiveWatts and his trusty ally, El Dorito, silently crept past the Baron’s elitesecurity taskforc.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/664622/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/664620/ Astoundingly stupid edutainment http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/651563/ Meanwhile, in London, Sir Winson Churchill and his right hand man; Detective Watts, had gotten word of the Villainous Villains villainous plan."The League of Villainous Villainy once more threatens the very existance of the free world. Luckily, our most eminent scientists have a plan that could very.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/649609/ A cold wind blew through the isolated town of Pirate Cove. Some say it was a sign of things to come. Others say that people who say that are know it alls who just say stuff like that to sound mystical. The rest have no idea what Pirate Cove is. It is, as I said, just an isolated town, though, all th.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/649565/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/649548/ "Only by gathering together the seven sages" Sheik said "can you enter Ganondorf's castle and defeat him.""Oh yeah?" Link replied "Well screw you b***h!"Link tore Sheiks head off and threw it at Ganondorf's castle, reducing it to a smoldering crater; leapt onto his robot bear and charged towards the.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/649032/ Poems are trickyHaiku are too I supposebut still, meh, did one. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/649031/ "I have, once again, devised a most ingenious method for bringing The United States of America to its knees.""What choo talkin' 'bout Dracula""Ah, I'm glad you asked Steve from marketing."Dracula flipped his blackboard around to show the gathered villains his evil plan."I propose" he said "that we b.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/648476/ http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/648471/ “This towndeserves a better class of criminal”The Jokerlit a match and threw it onto the gigantic freakin’ pile of money.“Not so fastJoker”“Arrrrgh,The Batman” The Jokerpulled out a pencil and impaled Batmans brain on i.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/648086/ "Oh, so I see your little restaurant has a little theme going, a NOT ENOUGH TABLES THEME!""Sir, if you'd just calm down I can-""I'll do nothing of the sort! Now, I may have a few eccentricities. I never, for instance; eat any food that begins with the letter F, like chicken, but I still deserve the .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/646639/ “THIS ISSPARTA!!!”KingLeonidas knocked the black guy who doesn’t have a name into the unexplainedhole of doom with his gigantic testicles. But then, suddenly, Xerxes was there. “Somebody’sbeen a naughty boy and he needs a spanking”.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/646098/ The guards came to Jesus and made a thorny crown from branches and put it, and a purple robe on him. They then said, "Hey! You! King of The Jews!"Jesus replied by saying "Oh, Father, these men know not what they do. Lets kick some arse!"Suddenly, the nails sprang from Jesus' hand, killing Judas and .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/643710/ Another one of these. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/643371/ Four scores of years;and dust and graveall your lifea road to death is paved.Your beating heartyour flesh and boneyour love and hopeand then; alone. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/642945/ It's thishttp://www.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/641433/In poem formRunning into batleflag above his headmighty Leon stabbed an armyof gouls and the undead.Standing high on bloodied corpsehe leapt straight through the airhe fell right down, upon the earthand on a zombie bear.He pulled a g.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/642884/ The continueing depressing lovelife of me. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/642560/ A sorta kinda sequel to a generic zombie fic. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/642019/ Ok, the first one came out weird and wasn't as good as I wanted it to be anyway so I'm doing it again. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Detective-Watts/641967/