http://slow.writerscafe.org/DOTARD94 The original writings of author Sarah Jane en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776176950 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 I have cursed you in mirrors,called you heavy, called you ugly,tried to outrun your reflection,tried to carve you into something smaller,less noticeable,more pleasing to someone else’s eye.Yet,You carried me through years I thought I wouldn’t survive.You held the weight o.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2949296/ My grief does not wail.It waits.Settles in the dust behind photo frames,drips down the inside of coffee cups,folds itself into cornerswhere light forgets to reach.I keep disappearingin places I’m supposed to be found.In clean forks.In rooms that tidy themselvesas if by magic,I am tir.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2947566/ I didn’t see it, through child’s eyes,The quiet love you'd always show,How time with us was joy to you,A truth I'd only later know Time revealed what I’d ignored,The silent toll you bore in vain,She cast you slowly as the foe,But your kindness would remain.On that last night,.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2912563/ Hand to breast, Hand to wombSlips of reality, slips of another Purple feels heavy, suffocating Yellow, my calm and steady Blue, a cascading ribbons of releaseGreen rests solid, unmovingPink dapples weary with weightlessnessGrey's cool tendrils pull, akin to gravityI fall into dr.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2874420/ Good morning,  I am writing to address an incident that occurred during a pediatric ophthalmology appointment for my daughter, Catelyn Eibel - DOB 11/23/2020, at the Cole Eye Institute on the main campus last Thursday, June 20th. We had scheduled a follow-up appointment with Dr. F. Ghasia based.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2857832/ When I was a young girl, I'd sing pretty songs And dream of the days I'd be freeFree from the shackles placed firmly at birth By parents who knew nothing betterWhen I was a lady, I'd sing pretty songsAnd dream of the days I'd be freeFree from the shackles placed firm by the churchTo a husb.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2831859/ Fire gaping from my mouth Flames licking my eyelidsHeat radiating from my hands For a world where my children Would not need such resilience In a world too cold to careFor my mothering to be minimalFor their childhoods to last A little longer Than mine did. For them, I wo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2820325/ You turned my well intentioned rational onto its head and created a power struggleWhere you placed yourself above meAnd above my morality and judgementsAnd demanded an apology from meThe belief that you know my patternsThat you can predict my moodIs more than the belief I will ever a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2801946/ When it rains we all feel the moisture. We gather our umbrellas and boots for the puddles. We stare out our windows and search for some sun. The clouds hang grey over everyone at some point. If one person gets caught unexpectedly, we can sympathize because we've all been drenched. But I can feel sor.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2798426/ You smell of overturned dirt and protection Scents that feel primal but nurtured I bare my canines, but you heed no warningI am safe I am pale yellow around you're eyes Shielding you from intrusive thoughts Harm that will not become you Harm that willHow can I form my bones around yo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2798323/ Gentle hands held out in gesture.I surrender mine.Our eyes meet for the last time Too soon after meeting Though I see you, gratefulThankful for a stranger Who has dammed you to hell Because forces stronger than us Deemed you unbelievable.Unbelievable. Between the haze of your fam.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2797222/ Predispositions and prejudice Pile high outside patient rooms Drowning in dependency Forsaken, some sacred oaths This is self-inflicted, deserved.But underneath preconceived ideasAnd disgruntled demeanorsI see your troubled eyesPeering with sad honesty About what is on the a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2796150/ Thats enough Thank you, breaker of boundariesFor instilling boundary lines Lighting them ablaze And setting the firm I've had enough of being an imposterA poster child for surviving darknessFor thriving without a God That shows no mercy like I did Ive had enough hard lessons .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2795964/ White with black stripesWeathered and raggedTailfeathers blown throughWith bulletsThis is what I am thankful for:Slow breaths and deep smiles.Quite conversationsWith loud preamble.Humored compassion, Im grateful.Big moments and small feats,The moment of inspiration.Learned .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2795866/ I am overwhelmed with PeanutsCrumbs I'm grasping for sustenance For sleepFor peaceI wake to news of slaughterOf disasterOf painI dream of drowning Of fallingOf failing I eat indifference And have onlyPeanutsCrumbs http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2788829/ Intrusive thoughts are expensiveLike a fine wine, they age Altering like shadows of a lampshadeWhen the bulb is looseThey bruise, like peachesLying stagnant in their cratesMelding to my experiences Blooming when im stillThey are convincing, prolific liarsBerating their truths, fading mineU.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2785527/ I have mouth sores that stingLike your backhanded compliments andI've been the swallowing shards Of your overabundance of chancesBut I stilI smile with forgiveness, thatI can't comprehend, running down my chest While you eat it up and ask for seconds. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2175504/ Words are buried thoughtsPulled by the root too early.Wilting before they can ripenCrumbling from our mouths.A bleeding heart Carved from earths breast.We, the pretentious,Think we understand wordsWhen we are killing themWith impatience. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2175298/ Water. Air. Lungs.Floating face down. Grasping, gasping.Water filled tongues. Ive been drowning sinceI met you. "You can't keep saving me.""I can't let you go, either. " http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2175256/ Soiled shirts, muddied with workAnother hole in the dirt Gathered grief surrounding hurtWhere guilt and obligation lurkHurried goodbyes, on the clockAnother ramshackle walkBuried hope enclosed in a vault Where closure comes as a shock http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2174303/ A parasite, predator, and a preacher Walk into a barOne is looking for false redemptionOne for the source of their obsession And one for spiritual validation The parasite has found a new hostThe predator drinks to familiar oblivion And the preacher doesnt see it comingWhat good i.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2172572/ Deep sleep yielding SpringLeaving Winter leaves paling Knowing Summer brings outMy preferred huesI wish I still felt warm, even With small percentages of protectionStill, my gathered limbs fall limpBaring brown eyes like a sunset After someone smears It muddyBudding blooms of Spr.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2169265/ Shrouded in secrets That I do not commit to sendingMaintaining that you are the mystery As if reading some poetry Makes me the transparent one.Understand.I do not disappear as easily.Honesty is a one way streetRiddled with waiting and riddles.Decoding your encryptions haveBecom.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2168594/ Palpable fabricationVivid fictionGrasping threadsFragmented “You are the only oneWho means anything”Thus ripping the seamsConnecting meThrashing blanketsSnapping laughterI hear her downstairsThough your candor“You are the only one Who means anything”Thus fading the .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2167886/ Mother cut off her legTo save herselfUp to the kneeTo surviveShow me the stumpBehind bloodied bandagesShow me the boneChecks and balancesRecord the whimpersAlone in her roomRecord the changesOf her tuneTell me it stunkBurned with infectionTell me she sobbedReceiving this lessonGiven the choiceBetwee.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2167883/ Acrylics with texture cover betterThan pretty watercolor promises Or the splattering spray of solaceYou are a painter of shadesSurprising even your canvas with color While your imagination reignitesYet between the murky hues of moodThere is a memorizing quality in your art So I a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2167582/ Seven thousand and seventeen spoken languages And I cannot string along enough solid wordsTo appropriately explain exactly how I feelBut I still write in my mother tongueHoping to convey some emotionThat you can empathize withSomething that you canHold between yourOwn two handsAnd believe.As is.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2166829/ Fragments, slivers, snippets, scrapsHow many of them have I consumed of you.How many do I have toFor you to think me all knowingI can pick you out of my teeth at nightAnd still taste the hints of your mystery by morningSuffer the indigestion of your reluctance Yet savor the reminders.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2166794/ Moments differ from memoriesFor their differences in speedLooking back,We have spent little time Enjoying our time togetherAnd we have lost too muchTrying to find the next secondTo memorize its detailsNot seeing it as a thiefOf its predecessor Once we realize our lossWe turn too soon to re.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2166776/ Dismantled sentimentsGround down to glimpsesBirth diffidence Silence never needed to speakI was always listeningWhen distance rallied havocI did not waverOpen ended vacanciesWith well-meaning endsHarbor inferiority http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2166375/ I was raised in catholic Sunday schoolBut those lessons never followed me homeScriptures became stories,Fairy tales to the faithless My life lacked the luxury of a powerful presence Short of the one made one flesh and bones.I was more familiar with the tellings of hell Than I was.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2166152/ I once shot myself after three blank chambersOnce for shadowed thoughts that hauntTwice for the cruel tricks of illusion Three times for the thrill of feeling But the fourth time was an accident Because I no longer wanted a reminderLodged into my fantasy filled headI wanted to danc.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2166143/ My last dance was filled with fantasies,Tightly precise curls, a full-bodied ballgownAnd hours searching the far walls for you.I could taste the sweat and laughter in the air.Wondered what flavor your smile would be,If your lips would burn me and if I asked for it,Would it be considered arson?Fortun.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2165801/ I was nine when I first walked through the houseAn empty shell, growling for its fill.The grass was tall enough to sheath me kneelingI believed that meant I would be safe.Yellowed bare walls and freshly swept carpetsPromised the possibility of being made whole.But I felt the wind tugging me back to .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2165637/ This is not goodbyeOr farewellFor bleak shades Would devour vibrancyWithout your presenceThis is not endlessOr eternalFor bitter grief Would consume blissWithout your contactThis is not casualOr carelessFor painful anguishWould ruin me Without your insight   http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2165479/ I cannot writeI am trying I amAnd I am sorryI should stopCauterizePursuing confusion Only confuses meIrrational thoughtsHemorrhageAbstract distractions Arn't nearly distracting I am human Heinous Conscientious licentious Being highly contentiousI am sorry I am.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2165445/ I've been reading fiction novels Hoping to catch you between chapters.Pasting your face on main characters Who conquer all with love.When the unexpected lovers mouths meet I try to taste the emotionally blurred words Try to visualize the page changing colors Try to tear myself to the.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2165260/ You asked me to meet you in the middle Between the guitar strings of a song I have been walking for years looking for it You asked me to meet you in the airWithin the rising harmonies of the chorus I have learned to fly in my dreams You asked me to love you just a little Amongst th.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2165144/ Shards of my reflection                        Dripping adhesive A mosaic of dreams,Dissimilar Comfortable glimpsesSoaked with perspective A glimmer of historyFamiliarShards of our reflectionsFlecked with distanceAn echo.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164984/ He is solid, he is real.He is mine. Nausea consumed coffeeOver probing discourseHis gentle smile authenticHis soft gaze assuring"When can I see you again?"Fragile contact between sleepQuiet confessions between breathsHis limp arms reachingHis tepid warmth embracing"What are you thinking about?".. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164961/ Can you smell it?The scent of my infractions Minute particles wafting between usI watch your nose flare,Acknowledgement of my fragility.Announcing a crisp breezeStole the odor,You smile at my questions.I can feel them from here,The curving of your amusement.The shaping of your knowledge.Your wi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164766/ "Moons arn't as hot as you'd think, son."A tired man leans against a tree trunkA mouthful of sunflower seeds and wisdomBeside him, a wispy boy of fifteenFull of wonder and cynicism "But they are heavier than they look." http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164745/ Will you pull apart my sentences?Break down my punctuation, pauses?Will you hunt for my secretsBetween the haphazard stanzas?Will you discuss my intent Over small talk and dinner?Did you need a second opinionOther than my own?Would I even tell you the truthIf you asked? http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164612/ EndangeredYou are rare, underappreciated, overlookedRipped from pretty gardens for looking dullFor smelling foulFor being different, but not different enough.StickyYou are overwhelming, consuming, difficultPlaced behind wire fences for safe distanceFor lingeringFor permeating without consent.Resilie.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164605/ I love bathing.I love the way air bubbles from my earsAnd how I shiver when the heat of the waterTouches my neck. I love to let the water rise up to cover my eyes,Letting it rest at the base of my nose.I love the sound of the water running when I'm underBut I love the sound of the muffled waves.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164603/ Lacking, we are reacting Unpacking baggage, untapped.Trapped, we are gaspingGrasping cracks, attacked.Bleeding, we are reapingConcealed diseases, unseeing.Breeding, we are demonsScreaming feelings, reason.Dying, we are risingSurviving suicide, reviving.Horrified, we are fortifiedRedefining geno.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164462/ A bag of snacks, water, and writing materialsAfternoons of trickling water and rustling leavesJust me and the voices of quiet animalsWho only came out after I held my breathI would like to tell you that piece of land was mineOnly I know betterLike all things, the heart of it belonged to another.&nbs.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164359/ Sleep pads my eyelids,Cushions my voice,Blankets my thoughts Until they are thick and Lined with a hazy fog.Laden with chaosI lay here awake.Burdened by the brokenFigments of my vividImagination. One by one, my lashes Stitch themselves. Blinking out the blindingConnecti.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164261/ Quiet statements in between silence, anticipating rebuff.I will fade so that you need not.I will release, cease to exist to your overwhelming eyes.Before I witness your shadow bid its elusive farewell.I am dripping pixels one by one as to not be noticedAll while hoping you notice.I will not wait any.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164250/ These words fall out seldomSpilling sporadically as confettiWisdom is much more graphicWithin deep eyes, pooled warmth.Despite the dilemma I implore you to touch meTo lose controlIt is important To find a quiet spaceWhere no one could hearOur shared sense, etherealWhere we need not hesitat.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/DOTARD94/2164208/