http://slow.writerscafe.org/ShyJoe The original writings of author Shy Joe en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1775984145 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 A docile schizophrenic http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2955207/ Watching the snow melt is kind of bittersweet.  I hate it, but it's also the longest relationship I've had in awhile.  So it's kind of like, you were there for me but, meh. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2927515/ Dr Franklin Lee: The surgery went well and your dad can go home today. Me: Frankly, that sounds good.Dr Franklin Lee: *small pause* Ya, here are some instructions for post-op surgery blah blah blah..Me: Frankly, that's quite the regiment but I'm sure he will keep on schedule. Dr Franklin L.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2925419/ I have a confession to make. I've had an infatuation with swedish dishcloth's for some time now. I will spend hours on end watching YouTube videos of people cleaning up messes with swedish dishcloth's with great interest. But mostly, it's the products ability to retain water without dripping that .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2923073/ If I was to become a serial killer, I would have to have a unique attribute to set me apart from the rest of the crowd and live on in the history and minds of society.      Probably would have to be the mode of killing.  Something never done or used before.  I'm think.... http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2919862/ Was reading a scientific paper on how humans have been evolving for several thousand years but now we're at a point where technology is supplementing the evolution process. It actually suggests that we could start de-evolutionizing with suggested processes including shrinking of our brains, dec.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2913036/ Feeling good about myself. Helped someone through their relationship and I don't even know him. Get a lot of telemarketing phone calls from guys in India trying to sell me knock off Viagra, all the time. So I get the usual phone call today, "hello, my name is Fred (ya right) and I'm from the US p.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2888637/ Just wanted to let everyone know that a guy wearing a dresshelp me operate the self-checkout when I screwed it up.  I acted like a complete adult even though Ihad a million questions going through my head.Questions like, is wearing that comfortable? Is he morecomfortable than me? Is t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2883100/ Used to believe patience was selective and a choice we couldmake rationally.  The hellacious fart that came flying out of my a*s, despitemy best effort, with three people standing behind me in the grocery linereminded me otherwise. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2881763/ Sometimes that grass looks a little greener on the other side doesn't it? Maybe that's because it's fertilized by a lot of bullshit. Just remember that. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2879556/ Really good people and really evil people have two things in common. They're both motivated and passionate. Only one thing separates them. Desire.Remember that the next time you meet someone that's motivated and passionate. You might think they're rooting for you. And I guarantee they are. .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2878920/ I'm in town and this little girl that's probably like 8 years old comes zipping by me on an electric scooter/bike thingamajigger.  And I was just engulfed with complete jealousy.  I had to pedal my bicycle and use physical strength to get around when I was a kid.So yeah, I called her a sla.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2876828/ Haven't attended a boxing match in a while and seen there was one in St Louis tonight but didn't know if you had to get tickets ahead of time or get them at the door so I called up the organizer and this is the conversation we had.  Don't think I'm going.Me: Names Joseph. Just curious if I had .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2876826/ You ever notice when you enter Indiana from Illinois the welcome to Indiana sign says "Lincoln's childhood home"? Sounds kind of like a bitter ex-girlfriend. She'll be like, "oh yeah! You may have him now but I had him first!" http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2874723/ It's widely considered that the understandment of a properly made melted cheese sandwich takes 30 seconds in the microwave. 45 seconds if you drop the cheese on the ground beforehand to kill the excess bacteria. "Allegedly"Okay, maybe it's not an exact science but it was my last piece of cheese and.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2874244/ Well this new year is just starting out fantastic. Was in the pharmacy section to get some Tylenol and curiosity got the best of me when I seen some jock itch spray . I was all like, what's actually in that crap? I've got to find out because I'm an idiot. So yeah, of course I pick up a can and sta.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2874243/ Most childhood dreams never come true, or they achieve them, and they realize it's not what they really wanted. I just wanted normal sanity. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2870508/ when the ice hits my lips,and whiskey kiss's throatthoughts of you wont eclipse,fume fire lit kaleidoscope http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2870410/ Stepped outside to enjoy mid November Illinois scenery. You know. The dull gray cloudy sky, bare trees, dead tall grass, low 40° breeze of death in the air. Then I look over a barren desolate postmortem bean field and see a male deer mounting a female. Nature is weird.All react http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2869644/ Sitting here in bed not able to sleep thinking through memories of my past. You know how you can have a simple yet profound moment in life and forget all about it, and then just think about it randomly and just alters you again like it did back then? Maybe those moments were just meant for you. G.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2868444/ Those that say, "The best things in life are free", are blind to sacrifice.   http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2868378/ Seems like someone is always trying to sell something.  I just put it on the ground hoping someone will pick it up and put it in their pocket. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2868377/ The best part about the rain?  It never misses a beat.  You never know what rhythm it's going to lay down, but it never disappoints. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2868374/ If you are listening to music that's already got lyrics, you're not going to get any new ideas of your own.  You're just chewing on the peel of an orange. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2867731/ those of most intelligence, can make the worst decisionsand those in power, kill the most people...with a smile http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2865182/ vanilla soothed mouth ulcersseethed pine laden flannelrusted honey http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2865181/ Lyricless music is not without words, the deaf resonate emotions, and an obstinance with keen eyesight will forever be blind. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2864756/ When we know how we want to die, that's when we know how to live. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2863511/ Answers are not always the solution, words and pictures can lie, and oatmeal with raisins are not chocolate chip cookies....you f**k http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2863114/ It's nice to spend some time outside and not almost die in the process from the heat. Guess there are some insects way more excited about it than I am. A bumblebee landed on my shoe and started humping away at my footwear. Thought at first he/she was trying to sting, but upon closer examination, way.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2861592/ Facebook informed me that some of my videos have beenaltered due to copyright infringement. So I was all like okay what now. Turnsout it's those videos of myself naked I send to people when I'm drunk. So Icontacted Facebook and was like how is this copyrighted, that's me naked. Andthey told .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2859143/ There's a lot of sad things in life. I believe watching a loved one change for the worst in their older years have got to be pretty high up there. Was walking my dog outside on a leash, he's a bloodhound, to let him do his thing. He's 13 years old and has a white mask on his face now. Anyways, ther.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2858830/ No matter who you are, or what you do, we are all looking for the same thing. Purpose. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2857950/ Mirrors in the sand,Moonlight's reflection,Stars dance on your path http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2857616/ Confession time. I live my life vicariously through strippers. I don't stare at them as a pervert. Just living the dream. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2855104/ The human condition requires life's light to grow.  That light will cast shadows and sometimes it gets dark.  This forces us to create our own light in supplementation.  That's growth.  That forms you. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2854471/ Believe a lot of times I have trouble sleeping because I'm afraid. Afraid of missing something. You know, like you're just not doing enough. Is that selfish? http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2852778/ stars shine brightest to the east,eight hours from the sun,and a life time with you http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2847827/ wading through forest creekreflections of self, ripple obscurelyemptiness in motionlove affair with back to riverbedmaking love with water running over body, flirting with airsmooth cold memories brush upon Idivorcing empathythis last relationshipwould she take me home? http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2845843/ Plant pants. Get them now before they go out of season! The lifespan of the fad itself. *Green thumb not included* http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2845230/ We're always finding things that had no reason to be kept.  Then you're reminded of the things we wish we had.Broken mirrors are more useful than lost memories.  Blood spilt between the shards, dry and paint the past.Lost memories cast reflections to those blind of its cause. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2845115/ There's nothing exciting of the sun on a warm summers day.That is until you are hunted by the dark cold clouds from the North.They ride horsed on the winds of storms. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2844743/ I view people in four different categories. The people that live in the past, present, future, and then there are the ones that use these three categories to make decisions. I call this fourth category "the thinkers".Now the first three categories are most of the people you're going to run across in.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2841479/ There is very little that separates the weak from a******s.  The weak don't know or lack the ability to improve and their struggles to strive weaken them even more.  A******s are in the same boat, they just don't care. They don't struggle. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2840790/ Laughter while being sad is nothing more than irony http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2839853/ Go ahead.  Compare the Hobbits Bilbo and Frodo Baggins.  Frodo is a p***y a*s b***h!  I don't care if he had to bare the burden of the ring.  Even Sam Wise the Brave handled the ring better than him. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2839849/ Dying of thirst in a desolate land of loneliness, I'd avoid your spit.  http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2839847/ I smoked my cigarette outside my truck, in the Walmart parking lot. This is to avoid smoke in the vehicle, for it to avoid you. You ungrateful s***s. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2839830/ Despite my strive for originality, the fact that I can space-out, without the use of drugs, is not a unique talent. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2838897/ Today is not tomorrow, and it's definitely not yesterday.Today is a low rumbling thunder at 9 p.m.  It's light rain tapping your window, sliding down your view. Lyricless music whispering your day. It's piano music of your past, now, and light year away.  A symphony pul.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/ShyJoe/2837609/