http://slow.writerscafe.org/Lorienvandyke The original writings of author Lorienvandyke en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1775249877 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 I think you need to just close the f*****g chapter on him even if it was long enough to be a f*****g novel itself. You've cried over this boy so many times before, when are you goingto put yourself first? When are you going torealize this is not what you deserve? When youwere little w.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1853222/ Don't do that. Don'ttell me I'm nottrying I swamthrough 12 oceansand drowned in everysingle one of thembut each time the waterseeped into my lungsand the fish startedswimming in my blood-Stream I spat it all upand continued swimmingI am not a life raftI will not pop in the middle of the ocean I.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1853220/ He may love me. He probably does.He probably thinks about me all thetime. But that isn't what matters. Whatmatters is what he's doing about it, andwhat he's doing about it is nothing. Andif he's doing nothing, I most certainly shouldn't do anything. I need someonewho goes out of their way to ma.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1853218/ Getting to know you was the most wonderful adventure.It was like suddenly discovering the love of my life and mybest friend all in one. There were moments when I wasalmost afraid that this couldn't be real... That YOU couldn'tbe real... Everything about you was just too perfect and wewere so compati.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852773/ Side effects of being numb due to mental illness:1. not crying for weeks and weeks on end till one day breaking down over something not actually worth getting upset for.2. not being able to tell if your feelings for people arejust platonic or romantic or if you're just lonely.3. instead of cari.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852769/ I'm never going to kiss him again and I'm trying to wrap my head around that.I'll never tell him I love him again. I'll want to, but I will keep quiet.I'm good at that. I'll never fall asleep on his shoulder again; it was my favorite place to lay.I'll never feel the warmth of his body hit mine becau.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852768/ "Why do you hate yourself?"the answer was the simplestyet the most complicated.because I've been rejectedbecause of how I look.because I've lost people I lovebecause of the way I am.because I am not goodenough for anyone to love.because I have had 2 friendsin my whole life.because I've always been a.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852767/ "Are you happy?"Is such a difficult question.I always say yes, because I have friendsI laugh at jokes, I go out a lot and have funmy life isn't as bad as it could be, and I don'thave terrible problems. It could be worse.but then, one night at 3 AM when I'm alone still awake, lying in bed, think.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852766/ She was too quiet, or she was too loud.She took things too seriously, or not seriously at all.She was too sensitive, or too cold-hearted.She hated with every fiber of her being, or loved with every piece of her heart.There was no in-between for her.It was either all or nothing.She wanted everything .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852765/ One day, I promise you, you will wake up and be genuinely happy. It may not happen tomorrow, itmay not happen next month, butit will happen. Sadness does notlast forever. And baby girl, I knowhow tired you are of hearing thesethings, and seeing these things &it not getting better, but .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852763/ When you're a cutteryou notice different things.You noticehow some peopleonly wear long sleevesand pantseven on the hottest days of summer.You notice the red cuts,when bracelets slip down in class.You noticepeople's empty eyesand the way they tug awaywhen someone grabs their arms.& you glance th.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852761/ Maybe the problem is me and maybe it always has been.Maybe the reason I'm so sad is because of myself and I've become addicted to feeling a certain way and I refuse to let myself recover.It's my fault I can't seem to love my mess of a self and it's my fault everyone leaves because I shut them all ou.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1852760/ You're slim and dainty, and when you walk it's almost as if your gliding. When you sit down when wearing shorts in class your thighs seem as if they're London and Australia: so very far apart even when you're on a chair. Imagine being at lunch and seeing everyone scarfing down countless calories and.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1843970/ did you know that sometimes spinal cords snap and friendships end / somehow pinky promises end up broken and sometimes the seemingly happiest end up dead / i find it funny how much blood can flow out of someones wrist when we learn that our bodies are mostly made up of water / how ironic it is that .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1843968/ The scariest thingis when you realizethat you are addictedto something.Whether it isalcohol,Self-harm,or drugs;You know you are addictedwhen you say to yourself"this is my last drink""this is my last cut"or "this is my last pill."But the thing is you cannot simplyjust stopbecause an addictionis.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1843966/ 1. Razors are a pain in the a*s to get out.2. Don't ever let it get to the point where you can't control it.3. Cuts hurt way longer than just when you're in the shower.4. Shaving will never be the same.5. Sleeves move around, and they won't always be covered.6. The fabric from your jeans will make y.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1843964/ Dear mom,I'm sorry for smokingI'm sorry for drinkingI'm sorry for yelling and crying all the timeI'm sorry for treating you like shitI'm sorry for being on my phone all the timeI'm sorry for not doing better in schoolI'm sorry for cutting myselfI'm sorry for lying to youI'm sorry for coming home lat.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1842787/ Months comeand months goI feel exhaustedtiredsadIt is like I am suffocating,like I can't breathelike the walls are caving in on meI am giving upand I'm sorrybecause I give up on everyone else as wellI miss myselfI miss smilingI miss being happyI miss loving youI miss loving anything that isn't sleep.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1842280/ I thought I was moving on,until this morning someone asked me;"If you had one wish, what would it be?"and the first thing I thought ofwas to waste that wishon you. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1842278/ He's terrified of hurting those who he is close to. So when you're out with him and a fight begins, please understand he knows best and he is looking out for you. It's best to listen to him instead of fight with him. Hurting you will kill him inside.He is actually incredibly smart, even though he ma.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/Lorienvandyke/1842275/