http://slow.writerscafe.org/_mal The original writings of author _mal en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1775992450 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 Maybe you didn’t knowAt your funeral your toddler wouldClimb, monkey like from one set of arms to the next Staring intently into wrong facesBefore settling confused on her nanas hipAnd running outside in her tiny white dress Maybe you didn’t know Your mum would lean over .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/2773214/ Goodmorning morning time. Tip tap them out into my palm as the jug whistlesand the kids caw for their breakfastlunchboxes are packed and clouds of vapor are directed out the open doorI swallow three, then four and five and blithely blend a smoothieSmoothing ointment on her neck Where t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/2145308/ Forceful exhalethe vapor expelled carries off my heavy heartunsteady-you came out OK last year. A night like thisfeet caked in mud, fingers numb  we found you slumped inside your carlight on, neck bent impossibly           you .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/2119867/ Side step your lifeFlat on your backWarm waves lap insideThose memories that makeYou youGentle now, without having to touchThe feelings you canLay back and observeConsider as one blends into the nextAnd beautifully removedYou watch your former self f**k-F**k up, per.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/2085040/ Alone, Jason pulled the triggerHe didn't have to do itI didn't want to see itReflected in your eyes, wideSwallowing down bileDepicting what youThought were stomach contentsBut was fact the inside of his headYou have her hand to hold nowAnd I'm grateful for itHer skin hopefu.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1993548/ Tinder vs. love http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1911247/ slicing vegetables with shaking hands curt wordless demands from the high chair the contents of the kitchen cupboards underfoot pots loudly played by a little boy who wants! Doesn't want! Their feelings tied to ours http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1868398/ And suddenly the colours are vicious and the soundsassaulting stomach dropped dragging breaths in around ittrying to climb upthrough my ribcage cannot get out of my head  so focused, every element of existence competing forattention disconnected if I'm going.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1856544/ Unwanted answers. When it hurtsDrop your phone make eye contactEat an apple have a shower go for a walk goTo god damn sleeplisten to yourself http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1850393/ In that moment it is feltIt is spokenIs it true? Less true?For being sullied by words that cannot coverThe depth of feelingClicking past behind those eyesMore true for the attempt?Feelings flicker tickingThrough the angles of your smileDegrees of vulnerability-Shut down. Dull.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1841172/ Friendly smile, words oozeGut instinctMakes me watchYou watching himOne step closerI will disembowel youOn edge, head pounding http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1810929/ Sam Sam the invisible man sits quietlyDown amongst the f*g ends and chewed gum,In the metre wide strip of shadeKindly provided by the lip ofOpen mouthed shopsCap pulled low when he's tiredWhen his eyes are shaded That's when they'll risk a glanceWell loved guitar cradled on his kne.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1738293/ These are our momentsFeet sunk in knee high waterOne pushing through and pulling backDiscomfort of the summer held at bayBy this little plastic poolOne hand on my stomachTiny foot straining against stretched skinAnd a little man crouched at my kneeBrow furrowedPouring water from cu.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1713064/ Feel it youshut down youDo what it takesto push it all awayitgnaws away atchainsalways rusted always beentrying to make you feel itsome of itas it should come,naturallyjerk backif it stingsit shouldand will later warm youas it fades the softthe goodaff.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1632097/ Lives touchSmoke caressing stale breath winds up above my head  - 5 minutes max then back to you -one eye carefully holding three hoods in sight  black holes for faces backs turnedAgainst the hospital glaresnapped back by footsteps as anotherdrifts up to the boundary line&nbsp.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1631406/ The sky is a bruise that the trees gently nudge awake. Transient hands reaching up, birds perched in their arms singing high        sweet and hungry a warning a greetingAnd behind it a light In a window. Some body uncurling sighing and dropp.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1603375/ The knowledge of how much your heartWeighs heavy on mine picturing you In pieces alone onlyLiterally nowDid it get burnt with your body?a sack of statistics Cold foreign face.High necklineA whispered goodnight in the dark. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1560420/ Bury it you can't just There is so much to doRight now likeBuryYour head in your phone inYour arms inThat dishwater that bitesOr that story he loves that babywho squeals with Delight whoIs not quite a babyanymore http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1560348/ My sun http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1500986/ Thebeach disolvesAnd we stare fresh eyed, awaremy stomach drops because you’re... and the scene dissolves The bitter taste of mo(u)rning.Life without you shining through the panes of a kaleidoscope of memories http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1494243/ Got some pretty things Got some pretty rings nowPeeled from her dead mum’s pretty fingersLike she wanted, passed on down the line.Baby screaming down the halluntil his throat is raw, because he doesn’t want to sleepHis mum doesn’t want to sleepJust some quiet to remem.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1463676/ Sometimescast my eye back over years shrouded in smokea trail sticky with cherry menthol syrup most obvious- that I limped from disaster to space to despair clinging to whatever would take my armHold me(me, me) up. Happiness that fell awaywhen the money dried up,when there was.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1393523/ curled into me, distracted- each rain dropslips down mountainstaking pebbles,leaves, cliff tops. Laying barethe land andBecomingpuddles. Pools, your eyes arepools. Lakes. Idrink you inrun my hand acrosssmooth surfaceof your face, watchthe ripplesburbles, giggles        .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1393143/ It’s the little things-every moment passesthe memories so importantwhen all has changed andwhat you’re left with is a dry residueof what you think it felt like.What you wish you’d noticed, heldthe details long since scatteredor never quite containedUnfairlyu.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1306494/ After all these years the edges are smooth flesh pocketed and fading from dirty purple to pink white, tight white and light purple when it’s cold andsoft skin becomes a map of my life run your fingers down and each notch could speak volumes, could tell you some things f.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1257422/ If the sand isn’t already slick with oil, one day I’ll balance you on my hip as the waves lap at my thighs and be filled with joy again, discovering the vastness of the world through your eyesa second sight, completeperfection your father’s fingers entwin.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1256930/ Youhave a smile that can’tbe captured, awareit becomes guardedbut in the safety of us its light is enoughto draw me up foreverhoping to see it againsee you lookingat me, and smilingeyes glowing with laughterturning your face to angelwild man.You cannot be brought.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1234971/ This might be a part 1, http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1219873/ Sometime today they cut the grass, in the park outside and I slipped my key into the lock and crawled insidemy bed to doze, a babygrown weeks and taken I took back in my arms, afraidof time the world outside us lulledhe who held his head up in my arms and smiled lovingly into my eyes whe.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1212437/ Moodswings, my head wants to explode. I needsome space between me and feelingthisface pressed to the pillowpull blankets up over me can’trelax, eyes leaking, uncomfortableknowledge thattime has to passfor my brain to recover itsstores, whatever chemicalbanks I flooded lastnight for some hours .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1165692/ I was going tomessage you back, sometimeWith us it didn't matter that the months or years had passedone would toss down a line andonce in a while the otherwould bite, and tugand the words would cometumbling out, sentences soon becamemeasured trimmed down to the bonesof their meaning&n.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1102543/ I don’t remember, sorry Ilost that day to the bottle ofpills they dish out so carefullyeach week with theother stuff I swallow blithely to keep mesterile, wasted orgrounded. You smile Impishly as you fillme in on how I got those bruises and fora second I hate you.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1059169/ The glare from the moon is enough to light up the whole hilltop. Every sense in my body is tingling, alive, and I am so alert I could counteach blade of grass, from where I am, crouched in the bush, watching the road.Headlights cut through the darkness beside me and I shuffle back, quietly,q.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1046291/ Twist the top tip and tapout into a pickme up, pileShifting grains across the cover beforehoovering up the unblockednostril and passing along to the sound of a room full sniffing andgrinning, tongues starting to wag again as the last person inhalesand roaches the jointhel.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1038462/ The blood pulses softly through me drawn to the surface by the sun resting lightly on the skinI’ve carefully chosen toleave uncoveredpalms and feetneck and face liftedcatching the energycalling it down, downto my heartbeating into fingers and toestingling with the p.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1028620/ Cold She can’t be touched, but is touched and blushes deep red thather control is his when his fingers slip under soft elasticAnd sometimes she slips awayin that breath and her bodybecomes alien, laid out beneath hisshining eyes  http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1023301/ The sky is a delicate pink all along its edges, changingsoftly and suddenly to deep blue and dark grey a while away where the cloudslook ready to lighten their load. In the distance a forest grumblesthoughtfully, concealing a winding path that crawls up and over the mountain, Iwill get there.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1009981/ Is it too late to worryabout my teeth rotting outof my head,corroded by stomach acidsmoke stained andcatching coffee and booze in the micro pitschipped by a tongue piercingground together to chompnails down to the quicksometimesworking for me at an alarming ratestuffing food in.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/1007295/ Sometimesit hurt sobad, in my headI’d lay there for hours kneading my stomachwondering how mucheffort it would take to break the skinwith my fingersand pull my guts outSometimes you sit on that couch and talk about how the blanket of drugs I keep between me and feel.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/996571/ Spentsome time on hands and kneessearching the sandfor pieces of me, spreadwide and farwhen my head explodedand the voices sailed outonto the ocean,Shoving fistfuls in my pockets,desperately. Meanings,memory lost, thoughtand feelings like grains of sandslipping through my fin.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/992557/ ‘Sok you tell me kindlypatting my arm as I drop adish towel on the coffee stain rapidly spreading across the cream carpet,same place as where you pissedthe other day so it’s ok. You understandmy hand was shakinghe slammed the door so hardeyes bu.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/975037/ You’ve come to save me again withmy skirt riding high, eyes glazedspeech slurred excitedly (because I love you!)the bite marks bruising the backsof my thighs lose coverand mystery and remind youto knock his teeth out, that you're not sure you know me, anymore http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/973658/ Your hand used to swallow minewhen you took it and swung me upon to your shoulders smilingso I didn’t have to walk ormaybe you liked the trustthat faith that you would never drop meonce wrapped me up inyour warm wide armscareful, when I’d come back cryingready with some.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/973648/ It takes a couple ofgoesbut you get up in the enddrop your book on mine and climbover, closing my arm around youand looking up at me with eyes that seewhat the years have trained us out ofaware and expectant  http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/966051/ Write what you know, I know enoughto ignore that filthy feeling sittingin the dry part of my throat as I strip the sheets and empty the ashtrayknocking over bottles with my cut footwas I brave enough to drop my dress for you?woke up naked again.  http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/886745/ Some of my experience with psychosis http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/830607/ suck each little toe tenderly kiss the soles of your feet you can kick me in the face or hold my hand I’ll be waiting to drown in your dirt as you work out what you want and I eye the lines on your palm- throw me a crumb and I’ll live for a week or two.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/821550/ Coffee on the edges of his breath in her hairas he whispers that beingfat and ugly doesn’t warrant ruining his shirtpushing her off as she lets go towipe the blood off her arms on her legssoft embarrassed smile and his mouthcurves downwardsshe remembers his eye lashesagains.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/819141/ You tell me it’s been funand that you’ve found somebody elseto wrap you up warm to ask and care about your dayI tell you I’m okbefore you askand laugh until you’re out the doorwhen tears swell fat and heavy ready tofall down my face and I’m gratefulfor.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/818168/ If I couldbe something you wantedI wouldchangehow much longer can I sleep through these dayschasing your face in my dreamswaiting for nothinghoping for anythingpraying for someone to come shine the light in my eyeswake me from this slumberremind me I’m blindand you&rsqu.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/_mal/818146/