http://slow.writerscafe.org/hobi The original writings of author Hobi en-us Copyright 2026 WritersCafe.org 1776301956 WritersCafe.org RSS Generator 15 Old poem I wanted to upload.... http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2781042/ for jk http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2177986/ passion for compassiondevotion toward emotion no stranger to pain or danger to reigna privilege when civil-ishthe allowance of apathyapparently.learning to hear, be heard and be hurtlearning how to die and how to survive and how to collide, beliefs that need to abide, neighbors, no-, s.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2176627/ my love for you transcends time and spacemy love for you is pure and painfulmy love for you makes my skin tickle and my heart race the thought makes me crythat one day you’ll diei’ll be long gone by then but a world without you is a world i can’t imagine it hurts .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2175659/ is it too much to ask to do my homework somewhere other than on my bed? my mom is shouting with her friends in the dining room and i can’t think. it’s making my attention and focus so much worse ugh i hate crying in front of her. if i turn around shell see me. everytime i try to focus an.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2170278/ i’m panicking. every time i think things are finally going well with my sister she lashes out at me and thinks i’m ridiculing her. i don’t know what this anger is coming from. i always say sorry and try to make things better but it feels like she just doesn’t know me and thin.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2167288/ ‪my mom hates doing things for me specifically it’s such a s****y feeling. like she’ll go out of everyone’s way to get stuff for my brother and little sister but when i ask her for something she says “you want me to wait on you??” ughhhshhshsi want to die‬. .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2167005/ whatever. i should’ve just accepted this. i hate feeling so broken and hurt and everyone acting like it’s my fault. i know hearing about what i go through is hard but i need to talk about it. or else i’ll just feel alone and broken. she says she doesn’t wanna hear about what .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2165671/ we’ll be goodi swear we’ll be goodit hurts to try you said you understoodsharp warmth curdled scent is this what you meant?is this what it means to be loved?to be hugged? you swear you love me don’t you feel me drugged? i pine for summerthe only warmth.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2165471/ i wanna die. i want to die so f*****g bad. i haven’t felt like this for a while. but it’s scarily familiar and even more hopeless than i ever has been. cause i know that i’ll never be able to get better. this will just keep happening. my sister called me disgusting and a freak. i j.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2162297/ why does it hurt so much lately. i cant go to sleep. i feel so ugly and disgusting. i hate my body. i just wanna die. i’m really really not well lately. i’ve just been under so much stress and anxiety. it feels like nothing in my life is going right. i don’t want to start school ag.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2159419/ ugh i hate fighting. i’m a pushover. so it’s really big for me to stick up for myself when i’m done wrong. it makes me spiral sooooo much when other pushovers defend the person in the wrong and get mad at me for sticking up for myself. i’m so f*****g sick of weak people beggi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2159259/ wow. this is the first time in a while i’ve wanted to die again. i’ve been doing so good lately. i haven’t really had these feelings at all. but for some reason it feels like it’s been building up for a while even though i haven’t been able to cry lately. and i genuinel.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2152271/ i hate being this vulnerable. i can’t stop crying. every time i think about how hurt i feel right now i start crying. she asked if she traumatizes me tonight. she did in a way but how am i supposed to be honest to that kind of question. if she actually cared. i’m gonna stop that sentence.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2113632/ aaah its just been so hard to look on the bright side lately. stuff that shouldnt make me sad makes me sad and talking myself through it doesnt help. im scared to ask for help cause that wont save me. it hasnt saved any of us. i just want t stop trying so hard and give up so badly. doing the most mi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2109229/ Anxiety. I just watched the movie "Mother!". It was very triggering. it made me so anxious i can't get it out of my mind. It was almost forcing the violation down my throat. I feel sick. i don't know if me feeling sick is from the dairy i had or the anxiety or lack or sleep. could be all three.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2103302/ I can't help but feeling this way. I know it's not my fault, I know it's hard to stay consistent with friends. It just makes me sad that I'm not a priority. I know i'm fun to talk to sometimes when you feel like it but i just wish you could reply to me or don't gloss over my texts. I used to be angr.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2103110/ Looking through old pictures made me... nostalgic http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2099164/ today was bad for me. no matter how hard i try or ruminate about it i never seem to get over the guilt. i was horrible. i was neglected and i didnt know what i was doing and to what extent i did it. im so sorry. i'll forever hate myself. i cant forgive myself until she forgives me and i dont want to.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2090363/ today i snapped at my mom. if you know me you know i hardly EVER snap at my mom. last night i tried to contact her about how i have work in the morning cause she needed to drive me. but she was in the basement with my father who i try at all costs to avoid. i couldn’t find her so i left a note.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2085822/ make this be a reminder for everytime you expect your mother to do anything you expect her to do. you know her priorities. you know you’re not one. you know this just happens and it’s not your fault. she’s just this way and it’s dumb to expect more from her at all. don’.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2084648/ i’m wracked with guilt. everything i do has 1,000 consequences. today i stood up for myself. i feel like s**t. in the long run i’m glad i made my discomfort clear. but right now i’m beyond stressed at how my actions were perceived to my greatest friend. she understood. thank GOD sh.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2068665/ i spent so much time caring for myself i forgot how good it felt to be loved. it’s not specifically the feeling of being loved physically right here in this moment, rather the memory of how she used to caress my cheek and i felt loved. it was before i knew what guilt meant. before i could feel.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2063914/ my feelings about opening up have been permanently damaged. i always see it as pityseeking because i’ve grown up with so much pityseeking from my mom. i always feel like i’m being a bother and being annoying. i make light of it even if i just want to burst out crying and sobbing. how can.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2057602/ it hurts to try. i’m barley trying anymore. i’m barlet surviving. i hate having a mentally disabled mother. she’s manipulative and she’s ruined everything for me. she acts like it’s my fault. it’s my fault i have social anxiety. it’s my fault i’m brou.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2056391/ it hurts. every day i think back to when i forced you to do something to me. i didn’t know what it meant. but i still tricked you. i told you to stop as soon as you started but i can’t help but feel extremely guilty. i’m disgusting. you never deserved that. i’ll forever be so.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2051537/ it hurts so bad. the stress is overwhelming and i can’t help but feel hopeless. i can’t help feeling broken. people treat me differently. i’m weird. i’m different. i’m a mistake. i just want it all to end. i can’t imagine the pain it would feel to lose a sister th.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2049687/ i’m broken. i’m hurt. it doesn’t take much to hurt me. but it doesn’t take much to have common decency either. it hurts so so bad to have someone hurt you then blame you for being sad or mad at them. i just want it all to end. i’m so tired of living. why was i even born.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2049220/ i’m having trouble concentrating. my anxiety is spiking and my mind isn’t following a single pattern. i’m having trouble reading, isn’t caffeine supposed to make you concentrate more? it’s making me concentrate less and draining me of my energy. i think it has the oppos.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2048557/ i just need to be away. a place i feel like i can stay. this feeling of hopelessness and fear, it never leaves i never get relief. i never feel release. i’m trapped in my head.tattered to my bed.my memory fades i forget why i don’t want to stay. look down on me.make me .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2045553/ sharing always blows up in my face. why do i f*****g open myself up to my s**t family when all they’ll do is judge me and act weird. like i can’t even read a s****y dumb story i made without them overanylizing it. i f*****g hate my life. everytime i think about how my life is going no wh.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2043972/ life is the worst /gift/ you can give someone. you’re expected to grin and bear it and god forbid anyone want to end theirs. life f*****g sucks. to be honest at the end of the day there really isn’t anything to love for. i’m probably never going to travel. i’m probably never .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2042048/ when you tell me you’re ending itand stop replying to my textsi keep sending it,afraid to know what’s next.will i get a call? will you go silent forever? what was the point of it allturns out i was never really that cleverit hurts me more than anythingto think i cou.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2039827/ oooh my f*****g isn’t oh my f*****g god. why does he. think he can come up here. i don’t know what i’m feeling. my head started to hurt, i started breathing heavily, i can’t focus he keeps coming around. he’s still here. oh my f*****g god. i hate him. i really want him .. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2038838/ you know how F*****G hard it is to learn how to construct sentences normally when you’re constantly being cut off all the f*****g time? and when you try to contribute to a conversation, they talk over you and you look pathetic trying to get one measly sentence in? you know how f*****g s****y t.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2038557/ tonight tonightturn out the lightsi want to feel safe for once, alright?your presence weighs like heavy bricks on my shoulder back aches, hands shakei thought i’d stop feeling this when i’m oldertrauma has no limit, no ageyou’re the demon in my closet i’.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2038147/ i’m so sick of living in a toxic house. i always find myself on the verge of tears when i’m around my family. this can’t be my personality. i can’t be this hateful. i have so much hate in me i just don’t wanna deal with this anymore. my mom asked if i wanted to go campi.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2035950/ i had a dream my abusive father pryed open my door and ripped my laptop in half cause i was being loud. i woke up sobbing and whining cause i thought they were making black people into slaves again. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2034646/ i’m shaking and paranoidi know i should’ve atei can’t take care of myselfit’s always too late i might vomiti keep shakingi feel my tummy achingyour sighs ring in my headi cover my earsit echos insteadyou’re so caught up in yourself you don&rs.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2034584/ ‪it’s taking everything i have in me to not start crying right here and now i’m feeling so overwhelmed and i hate how hard it is for me to express that. and even if i could i would never want to tell her how i feel cause everytime i have she’s told someone else acting like it.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2034553/ what would the world lose if i were to lose it. it’s the worst pain i’ve felt, i didn’t f*****g choose this“life brings light and happiness daily!”so answer me why i feel loneliness lately. answer me why i’ve felt this since i was a baby. tell me.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2033526/ these window screens may as well be prison barsi dream of sun kissed skin, free from scarsi dream of friendly monsters who live in trees.i dream of swimming in moonlight not bloody knees. i dream of greece.i don’t want to be scared to leave my room anymorei don’.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2033525/ i f*****g hate my family. my moms an idiot moron who only cares about herself and getting pity from people and manipulating everyone so she’s the pathetic weak victim. i’d hate to be that weak. it’s disgusting. she keeps going back to her f*****g ugly abusive husband and she doesn&.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2032957/ i never do what makes me happy. the fear of failure is greater than my will to create. i still think about you. when i do i shiver. i constantly shiver. i shake. i hate shaking. i wish i could be open for the people i care about. to show its okay to be open. i wont hurt you if you are. i promise. it.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2031353/ so i've been listening to bts' new album lately and it got me thinking. i relate so much to the messages behind it. especially the song titled "The Untold Truth". i have a complicated relationship with my mom and it kind of made me feel that im not the only one who has felt all these mixed emotions... http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2030138/ story of an idiot who should know better http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2028520/ why. why do i still feel emptyi drink and i drink but why can i still feel the emptiness. i let you touch me and i let you undress me but i still feel empty. your attention doesn’t fulfill me.you say you want me and i thought that’s what i wanted to hear but i leave feeling nothing.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2025632/ i just wanna go home. i’m tired and sick of work. i’d die if i didn’t only have work on the weekend. i hate sitting around it makes it worse. i have like a 20 minute break when i’d rather just get it over with sooner but that’s not an option. yesterday i told my fr.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2024113/ the worst part is the finish. while i’m reeling i can’t help but feeling deminishedalone and scared in the dark i’ve been swallowed compensating makes it worse, this feelingi’ve been hollowed.empty on the insidenumb on the outmy belt is where my feelings r.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2023989/ into the Sims and talk to me tomorrow i’ve been up all day then all night now hopefully all day. i’m exhausted. it’s hard to focus when i haven’t slept. when i can’t focus i can’t read. when i don’t read i get stressed that i should read. when i’m str.. http://slow.writerscafe.org/writing/hobi/2023289/