All I Do Is Hold My Breath

Just a lot of things I'm feeling?

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Breathe in.

Hold your breath.

Count to three.

Tick.

Tock.

My whole life left.

Tick.

Tock.

Hold my breath.

Too fat too skinny too smart too ugly too easy too unwanted too gulable too warm too cold.

Where's the air.

Can't find the air.

Tick.

Tock.

Too messy too neat.

Fix it fix it now.

Hold my breath.

Count to three.

Stick my throat with my finger.

Too much too nothing too dark too lively too normal too gay.

Not good enough.

Never enough.

What is my worth.

Take a look at me.

Too fat too shallow too rejected too whiney too lonely.

I am born.

Father leaves.

Father stay, father please.

Hate destruction bombing killing.

Not good enough.

Never enough.

Talk.

With mouth closed.

Speak.

Tell me how the story goes.

Critisize destroy throw it up throw it away no one wants me not now not anymore.

Tick.

Tock.

Not good enough.

Never enough.

Pain anger defeat.

Not good enough.

Never enough.

Fix it fix it now stick my throat with my finger daddy no daddy stay.

Not good enough.

Breathe out.

Never enough.

Reviews

[Alice Oiseau]

Syntactically, this strongly parallels the emotion that drives it.
Emphasis on strongly.
Tone is very overwhelmed and stressed, and it even creates an intensity of the reader. I could feel my nerves tightening as I read this. The recurring "tick tock" shows the haunting factor of time. The pressure built throughout the poem and the end just felt like an explosion.

Aside from poetic aspect, I hope you're okay and you know if you need a hand, mine is there :)
Keep it up Zoe :)

[Preston]

this is breathtaking. (: