Incoherently Falling

Just some thoughts that go through people's minds.

It kind of bums me out when I am at loss for words. I'm not used to not having the right things to say. I have been enabled in that sense. Words are supposed to be my friends, not my foes. But why does it feel like I've been betrayed? Why have the words, that I desperately need to describe how I feel, left me?

 

Just when I need my sweet words, they have evaporated into the air that others breathe; that others can use. Why can they say how they feel, and not I? How can they use my sweet words, the ones that filled my mind, and tell the world the truth behind their actions?

 

I haven't been able to use the correct words, and form a coherent sentence that is one hundred percent solid. All the words I try to get out of my system turn out confused and foolish. I feel like a middle school girl, lost in a hopeless soap opera.

 

I am able to describe how my friends feel. I am able to help them trim the thorns that have grown in their paths, yet I cannot defeat mine. I guide my friends through their episodes of crazy, romantic dramas, but feel as if they seldom have time to sit through my thoughts, which seem to be so much more complicated. So, I sit back, and absorb their words, in hopes that something will sink into me.

 

Questions are asked, and I am left unsure of what to think. All I've got running through my mind are questions marks; nothing solid, other than their words. They try their best to answer my questions, when they find that they are in the mood to listen to my petty whines. But half the time, they don't know what to tell me. Or, they give the most vexing advices: “Listen to your heart,” or “What do you think? I can't tell you that one.”

 

For once I need someone to tell me how to feel. I want someone else to gain control over my emotions, so I don't have to blame myself for falling against my will...

 

[I've hurt for too long.]

Author's Note

Her refers to the one stopping the the catching that needs to follow the falling.

Reviews

[Ammietia]

I know what you mean. So many times have I helped my friends through a maze of trials and difficulties. I've paved their paths to keep them safe and happy. But when I need help? When I dare ask for help? They can't give me any advice that I can use. They give me petty responses that help me as much as a spoon would help heal a cut.

That is, if they care to turn away from their problems and find time to help me with mine. Its a thankless job at times. Keep hanging in there, though. I can't say that it will get any better, but what else is there to do?

[Clarisse Nanoit]

I'm not use to...----> USED to
...why does it feel like I've been betrayed.---->(.) should be (?)
...are questions marks...----> QUESTION marks
...or "What do you think. I can't tell you that one?"----> The punctuations are backwards. 'What do you think? I can't tell you that one.'
...so I don't have to blame myself for falling against her will...----> Idk if it's the structure (for lack of knowledge of the right word) of the sentence, but against whose will? Did you mean my?
:) Glad to be your nitpicker. You already know that I can relate to this 100%, and that I absolutely adore how (ironically) you could put it INTO WORDS better than I could. lol. I mean, it's ironic, since that's what this is all about. lol. Another great piece for you to share with the world. A-GRADE.
KH