Your Light

How I could know the day in the night, How I could gaze the sunrise in the sunset. How I could look the lightness in the darkness. How I could see in the blindness, How I could speak in the speechless, How I could keep the shadow in the groundless, How I could hear the sound in the deafness, How I could touch in the illness. How I could imagine the night in the limitless, How I could draw the nature in the restless, How I could notice the colors in the blackness. How I could live in the evenings without lunar, How I could wake in the mornings without solar, How I could look the skies without star, How I could have the romantic ambiance without lighter, How I could watch the movies without actor, How I could read the books without a writer, How I would come to this world without a mother. How I could work without a goal, How I would being without a soul. How I could live without a hope, How I would dying without a life.   I'm yours, who Has created the sun in the darkness, I'm yours, who His Light has brightened upon the Earth and Heavens. I'm yours, who Has given us the day in the night, I'm yours, who Has brightened us the track with a sight. I'm yours, who Has given us the blessed Olivier green trees, I'm yours, who Has given us the blue waves, I'm yours, who Has given us the blue skies.   I'm yours, who Has guided us upon His light. I'm yours, who is the hugest light upon the exquisite light.

Reviews

[anne]

I really love this poem and the feeling it describes. Your style of writing adds something wonderful to the overall tone of the piece.

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you for reading.

[Dhaye]

Nice poem about your light. Good job!

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you for reading.

[JayceeC]

A nice thought out poem with God symmetry on a whole. I think some people are afraid that a poem with this much repetition loses its power of thought. This one does not. A nice write of praise to the Creator and ask her is and does.

A grammatical point: could never has --ing verbs. Use present tende verbs such as know, see, gaze, etc.

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you I repaired it.

[jesserose99]

this was gorgeous. the repetition makes it all the more powerful. a beautiful work of art, clearly totally your own.

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you fro reading.

[sarah jane]

Very creative and imaginative well done.

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you so much.

[Pete]

Gratetful and hopeful. How - because you're his. Thanks for sharing.

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you so much. Your comment means a lot for me.

[Willard Wells]

Nice tribute to your life and your maker.

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you so much.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i agree about the font....but a really nice piece...heartfelt.

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you so much for your comment.

[Haider]

Very nice flow of thought a Sufi like poem

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you so much.

[McBear]

I really thought this was cool!

Critique;

Maybe tone down the font?
Use different colors to show the change in emotion?
Remove the big o'l space at the bottom

[abderrahmane dakir]

Thank you so much for reading.

[McBear]

:D No problem