summer, late afternoon (rengo)

This is a new version of this. I changed the last three lines.

 

the fog's rolling in,

long wispy ragged fingers

creeping up the shore.

the sailboats turn into ghosts

on the blue bay; clouds of fog

piled like silver mounds

of whipped cream on Del Monte

hills: Carmel smothered

in fog, chilled tourists will flock

to snatch up sweatshirts in town.

Author's Note

I have changed the end of this and would like to hear any opinions.

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

I think the ending gave this a more honest feel....a human touch. The personification of nature in this is splendid. Great imagery. Lydi**

[annie lee]

Thank you.

[Pryde Foltz]

Loved the whimsical end. It was a lovely addition and added a great deal of story.

[annie lee]

Thank you, Pryde

[Tate Morgan]

IO want to go there and buy a t shirt and drink lolLove you

[annie lee]

Tourists coming here for the first time are not aware of the magical micro-climates of this area. When my nephew came for the summer the first year we were in our new house, I told his mom to pack some warm clothes; of course, she thought I was kidding, so I had to outfit the kid when he arrived. Our warm weather is usually in September and October.