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Awwww......
This is a good write. So sad, but -sniffle- I like it.
This poem and heartfelt and I like the part:
"When your eyes looked at me I felt warm and tingly
Now you look at me like the Monster you told me I wasn't.
I remember when your fingers traced my scars
Now all you want to do is reopen and leave them there to bleed."
This almost made me cry and I don't do that often. The pain is written into the lines perfectly. It was beautiful
Posted 13 Years Ago
Awwww......
This is a good write. So sad, but -sniffle- I like it.
This poem and heartfelt and I like the part:
"When your eyes looked at me I felt warm and tingly
Now you look at me like the Monster you told me I wasn't.
I remember when your fingers traced my scars
Now all you want to do is reopen and leave them there to bleed."
A wonderfully powerful piece, written with raw sincerity - the poet's Muse will always and has always been Tragedy. Take pain, take anguish, take suffering, of our own lives, of the world around us, of others and reveal within that Tragedy a implacable beauty! This piece does it with poise and gravitas that belies your years. Bravo!
As to the pain that lies at the heart of the piece I will say just this: Everything fades. Nothing lasts, not the truest love nor the most bitter hate, all of it eventually fades into nothing. Even our own lives will end, we will be naught and everything we care for, everything we have done, will be nothing. So why linger? Why care? Instead revel, seek and find Beauty in all its forms. Live a life of sensation not of thought. One will never be happy if they continue to search for what happiness consists of. A person will never live if they are looking for the meaning of life. But then I am of the ilk of Byron, Camus and Keats so perhaps do not listen to their old ideas masquerading in my person.
Regardless my ramblings are at an end, and so I shall say thank you for sharing and bravo once more!
I've read some other of your pieces, and I say this is your best work up to this point... it's filled with real and raw emotion and doesn't sound so forced. Don't try to make a certain style or word navigate the entire direction of a poem of story (for example a rhyme scheme) but write in a free verse style to really get your point across. Well done on this, keep writing!!
It's safe to say you really have gotten into the lyrical aspects of your poem. I can see it more as a song than anything else, and it comfortably flows. I love the idea of tracing scars because it's a beautiful way of an affectionate care for you.
wow its been awhile so im gonna change this..im 15.my names nick.and i love writing more than air..and i love people..most of the time.so message me ahaha more..