Lips That Sting

just a poem

A misleading kiss, with no intention to love,
Her voice in my ear is all I can hear,
Her voice whispers, the lies that breaks me in two.
The whisper gets louder, with nothing I can do.
She steps on my bleeding heart, as she watches it break to pieces.
I want her to love me, but she loves him.
I still can’t see what he has over me,
It’s like she goes blind whenever I am around,
She never got to see what lies beneath my untouched skin,
The one thing that I will give, to the one that love me so,
This heart filled with love, which you just shattered to bits of lead,
As you left me, standing there, looking like a fool,
And I shall go to sleep, forever, in this hard, dirt bed.



 

Reviews

[Persnickety]

The first line is fabulous.

I'm not sure if the rest of the poem lives up the first line. However; I'm not exactly sure why. I just think the first line is very intriguing.

A misleading kiss -- there is room for a lot of emotion there, but I don't feel it through the rest of the poem.

I would work on trimming it up, making it more concise and fluid.

Whatever you do ... keep that first line. haha.