Hydra: The Great Departure!

Can folklore and commerce forge a real dream in the UK, where Catholic-Protestant rifts have created serious 'demo' depression?

A commerce-proposition solution vignette (or diary rather!) to the Catholic-Protestant 'dilemma' in modern UK, a place of symbolic tourism. Enjoy (and thanks so much for reading), 

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Welcome to the United Kingdom. It's a British dominion except for independent Ireland which is Catholic. British Protestants colonialists settled into the northern tip of Ireland and formed a population majority, so it retained Northern Ireland (Belfast), with a defiant and dissatisfied Irish Catholic minority still living there under UK policy.

Belfast (Northern Ireland) is a place of great culture and traffic, but Protestants and Catholics endure socioeconomic disparities because of poor Parliamentary policies debated by Sinn Fein, an Irish advocacy group supporting more employment opportunities for the under-represented Irish Catholic minority in Belfast.

Parliament talks have ensued in the late 20th Century regarding the dissatisfied Irish Catholic minority in Belfast (Northern Ireland), which has led to the formation of inventive new factions of the guerrilla-force called the Irish Republican Army (IRA) and its various branches (e.g., Provisional IRA, New IRA, Real IRA). Parliament negotiates with the Irish diplomacy group Sinn Fein to create more socioeconomic equity in Northern Ireland on behalf of negotiating IRA diplomats. It's divided the Christian world community and its two largest world-denominations --- Catholicism and Protestantism!

Now, we know Catholic-Protestant differences have persisted throughout history as a sort of timetable 'sideshow' of the development of world Christianity, but most of this history is ideology rhetorics and largely scholastic.

However, in Belfast (Northern Ireland), socioeconomic disparities between the Irish Catholic minority and British Protestant majority both living under UK policies have created a more radical/dangerous rift within the world Christian community and divided Catholics and Protestants in a much more 'civilization' weighted manner, creating images of armed resistance and violent police retaliation in the UK.

You might wonder about the potential solutions to such a horrible inter-religious problem in the same land! Why're Catholics and Protestants who otherwise comprise two proud arms of the world Christian community, in fact it's two dominant denominations, so incompatible? Irish Catholic minorities in Belfast (Northern Ireland) enduring unemployment problems and affirmative-action mismanagement are helpless in forging substantial commercial/product bridges with their Catholic brethren in Dublin (Ireland) in ways that would otherwise potentially bring Catholic and Protestant consumers alike together in Northern Ireland (UK).

This is what two U-Chicago Catholic professors are studying while conducting infiltration-analysis regarding blood-diamond terrorism-financing in Africa/Europe creating moves for rogue/ex-terrorists in the UK who're complicating normal talks with IRA factions through Sinn Fein and British Parliament. This pirate-money is encouraging dangerous juveniles to finance weapons and become 'lone terrorists' because of blood-diamond smuggling. These two U-Chicago professors, Ajay and Amlan Satan, are half-Algerian and half-Indian and US citizens and study the danger that blood-diamond financing into the UK will confound Parliament talks regarding Catholic-Protestant socioeconomic improvements in Northern Ireland! U-Chicago has therefore become a 'hotbed' for modern globalization studies, thanks to the Satan brothers (Amlan/Ajay).

AMLAN SATAN: I consider myself a 'nerdist' of The Wealth of Nations.

AJAY SATAN: I'm a fitness-analyst of consumerism imagination!

The Satan brothers are not only Adam Smith scholars and blood-diamond analysts but also infiltration-agents in Chicago with Interpol-relations coordinating diamond-interceptions in Chicago roads/banks controlled by modern corrupt capitalism-barons like Ion and Goldfinger. The Satan brothers have swapped Ion/Goldfinger terrorism-financing blood-diamonds with fakes and even toy gems and spread anonymous Interpol-relations messages in underground media like, "The Wealth of Nations is no longer about continental diamonds."

Meanwhile, retaliatory brute violence engaged by frustrated British police-military in anarchic Belfast (Northern Ireland) has further divided the Catholic and Protestant communities, and were it not for Israel-Palestine petroleum-relevant woes in the modern world of geopolitics, Catholic-Protestant divisions would capture the eyes of leaders worrying about this deadly schism within the world Christian community!

THE SATAN BROTHERS: We've been studying trends threatening the coexistence of Catholic and Protestant students in Belfast.

The Satan brothers feel the 'grip' on the Irish Catholic minority population held by the well-oiled mega-nation of England is like a giant corporation which they call the Hydra. Who can organize talks with a mega-avatar like Hydra? The Satan brothers formulate that what you need to coordinate with a 'mecha-octopus' avatar like Hydra is a helmeted 'hypothetical hero/avatar' who can control the very force of physical attraction (or symbolic negotiation).

THE SATAN BROTHERS: This is really a chess game, stretching from Catholic sympathizers in Chicago to Belfast brigades!

BELFAST GAZETTE: We're honored to continue to celebrate artistic images of the heritage of British monarchy in Belfast!

When Ireland (Dublin) obtained independence from the British Empire, it lost Northern Ireland to a partition-treaty signed by Irish leader Michael Collins himself who had no choice but to concede that the generations of British Protestant colonial settlers living in that northern 'tip' of mainland Ireland could not simply be forced out of their homes. This led to the treaty that would promise continued socioeconomic equalities between the British Protestant majority and Irish Catholic minority in a Northern Ireland 'owned' by the British but defied by the IRA in Ireland who wanted all of Ireland and all Catholics united...somehow. A civil war between factions of the IRA ensued at that time, resulting in the burning of the Irish Customs House and the assassination of the Irish patriot Michael Collins!

BUCKINGHAM PALACE: We're proud to continue to work to resolve schisms between Catholics and Protestants in Belfast!

THE SATAN BROTHERS: The sheer force of British governance is like a hypnosis-wave permeating images of unified control!

THE SATAN BROTHERS: To counter such a 'force' for pluralism negotiations in Belfast, we need images of consumer-style!

Is this the trident-force required to end the monolith of the 'Hydra' machine that the Satan brothers describe as the obstacle to consumerism-driven pluralism life between Catholics and Protestants in Belfast (Northern Ireland)?

BELFAST GAZETTE: If the Satan brothers are to form a 'Foreign Irish Republican Army' for commerce, it must destroy dogma!

The Satan brothers do indeed wish to destroy dogma and use their new group called the Foreign Irish Republican Army (F-IRA) to promote forms of creative-thinking towards the destabilization of retaliatory violence in Northern Ireland and arm guerrilla volunteers with toy water-guns filled with acid to shoot at patrolling British police-military vehicle tires while disrupting blood-diamond terrorism-financing smuggling while simultaneously creating forms of consumerism-advocacy catering to the imaginations of both Catholic and Protestant kids living side-by-side in Belfast. All of this is to create a certain lifestyle imagination that will replace the current images of violent engagements between Protestant police and Catholic dissidents.

THE SATAN BROTHERS: Our cause is one of consumerism and lifestyle advocacy, and we recruit fashion-designers too!

As the F-IRA (Foreign Irish Republican Army) recruits sympathizers who wish to work with this Catholic-Protestant dilemma in troubled Belfast (Northern Ireland), Sinn Fein continues to advocate continued commercial bridges between Dublin and Belfast catering to the consumerism among Catholics and Protestants alike in modern UK, making it a marketing campaign involving simple rhetoric-diagonals!

THE SATAN BROTHERS: Hydra shall indeed be replaced by a healthier imagination about 'glassy' capitalism bridges.

UK PRESS: If the monarchy is pleased with this 'consumerism-stylistics' approach to lifestyle-pluralism, Belfast will cheer.

BELFAST GAZETTE: The creative Satan brothers and their inventive 'F-IRA' gave us images of them costumed as storytellers!

THE SATAN BROTHERS: We fly in more advocates on Aer Lingus (Ireland airline company) for more consumerism activity!

UK GAZETTE: As long as publicity of the dangers of mismanaged diplomacy is achieved, consumerism methods can triumph.

THE SATAN BROTHERS: We want nothing but the circulation of folk-entertainment/media addressing the weight of pluralism.

CHICAGO PRESS: If the 'Foreign Irish Republican Army' creates commercial ties to Catholic-Protestant knots, the UK will shine.

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"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)