Police Things: Chicago Apple Treble

Narrated portrait of policework in the Windy-City indicating 'arrows' of living Homeland democracy.

A cool New Year's police-story. 

DISCLAIMER: This work of crime-theater offers no formal/commercial ties to the city of Chicago or to its police-department(s) or affiliates/associations and all images used herein comprise a purely 'personal' (fictional) work of social examination. 

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I worked as a police officer in Chicago for about two years and quickly became known as a wise and affable street-cop. My name's Amlan Satan, and I'm a Dartmouth-grad and moved to Chicago after completing my college degree after moving to the United States from Algeria and quickly became an 'avid-fan' of social-media/'Selfie' drawn culture of consumerism-culture lifestyle securities citizen-commentary on the cyber-highway(s) of the Western-world (ha).

The case I'm working on now concerns a series of attacks on local Chicago-area churches where the patterned criminal-psycho claims he's a Martian 'prince' disguised as a humanoid trekking like a 'Predator-hunter' and leaving footprints/signposts indicating he's a 'Homeland Terrorist' messenger in the post-9/11 era (wow).

PSYCHO: Not this rookie-age 'hotshot-Chicago' cop-man will track me down, for I'm wandering with a Martian-chess IQ (now).

Despite the difficult 'psyche-conditions' of this horrid Windy-City case of serial-crimes, I know this 'Martian-psycho' (who sometimes left sign-images of alien-dragon 'beings' at the church-scene(s) of his evil crimes in Chicago) is just an average disgruntled American worker/laborer who's got this fancy to send a Homeland insecurity message of an 'alien' dimension to simply make a media-sunt chase-game involving me, of course (but I've no intention to 'sully' the fabulous rep of my station in the challenged Windy-City now).

STATION-PARTNER (Ezzy): You need backup, and you need a more 'human' sensitization to this psycho's Martian cyber-persona.

Secretly, I've no intention to endanger Ezzy, my new female partner on the Windy-City police-force, by allowing this Martian serial-criminal to think she's my darling/buddy, since I'm certain she'll become his favorite media-theater stunt-ransom figurine or faerie for theatrics. I nevertheless had come to appreciate what Ezzy made me see about sensitized forms of crime-fighting regarding this case, and so I then decided to 'lure' the Martian with a careful note reading, "Find my badge in a Chicago abandoned warehouse, and you can post something 'literary' on the Cyber-Fanzine Dartmouth (for me!)."

CHICAGO POST: How'd you been caught by Officer Satan?
'MARTIAN': Amlan Satan is the Devil himself; he used a water-gun filled with acid to shoot my metal boots in a warehouse.

CHICAGO POST: Why the whole 'alien' thing at the Windy-City church vandalism/threat scenes involving men-of-cloth?

'MARTIAN': Homeland security is a laughing-matter, and I wished to 'draw' a hot cop chase for your media light(s) --- hahaha.

CHICAGO POST: So...we're pawn-sacrifice faeries in this Chicago 'game' of yours tying Satan to acidic alien defenses (hmm).

EZZY: This 'Martian' became a Chicago micro-celebrity...hanks to you, prince (Amlan).

SATAN (Me): Thanks, darling; let's drink coffee and read Treasure Island at a bookstore and forget about it/him.

EZZY: You're falling for me.

SATAN: Why not (you're no alien)?

I'm going to ask Esmerelda (Ezzy) to marry me and make her Sunday brunches using my amazing Food-TV inspired celebrity cookbook, and we'll forget about that ugly 'Martian' case...together (ha).

INTERVIEW: Why'd you become a policeman?

SATAN: That's a simple question with a humbling answer, good-fellow...to think 'clearly' about American distance(s).

INTERVIEW: Right...fan of social-media, I suppose.

SATAN: Giant (wow).

"Nobody trusts anyone in authority today. It is one of the main features of our age. Wherever you look, there are lying politicians, crooked bankers, corrupt police officers, cheating journalists and double-dealing media barons, sinister children's entertainers, rotten and greedy energy companies, and out-of-control security services" (Adam Curtis).

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"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)