The Solemn Night

it's a solemn night
When a depressing incident and distressing moments is hiding inside
The day is like without existence of sun
and the star light is like a deserted and hushed

the fire is burning but it doesn't give any flame
The wind is blowing and evilly teasing me
Heavily, Resolutely enjoying the painstaking and the degrading night

The night taunting me harshly
offending me spitefully
It's a tedious night
one day it's must farewell
but now it's going to stay for age

Reviews

[Dalton Wagoner]

Not bad, but needs work. You are on the right track, stick with your theme, just fix the adverbs and a few grammatical mistakes and it will be perfect :-)

[InsertImaginativeNameHe..]

This is quite pretty to read, I think you use a few too many adverbs, all the '-ly' endings get a little overwhelming, but it's got a great title and is very interesting. Good job.