Interlude

I would have you push, like Braille through my skin
till I feel you, like sand in my eyes. I can no longer open them-
they flood tears, milky, opaque salt-condensed with time.
I would have you take me, in every dream, in every night
torturing me with your finger tips 'till I scream out
"just swallow me!", and I'll swallow you.
We can become the insignificant dust particle.
My skin is electric, and you are my earth,
I will charge and charge, and charge
'till you save me from this furnace. Yes, you are a downy
resting place, where I can crash at the speed of light
unscathed, my catcher's mitt-oiled and well practiced.
You move with this propulsion, with the harmony of
rain drops that fall through the ceiling as music,
landing on the sheets in tiny, perfect splatters,
drying to a symphony no one could write,
storming my mind and my soul to the eye of quietness.
This is but a drop of my love for you.

Reviews

[Michael X]

overwhelming, passionate, raw, natural state, creatively envisioned expression which flows quite
effectively, describing the constituent energys as a continuous motion among wanting and sensual
underlying interstellar erotica- pretaining more to the artistic desirous, rendered intent, what
heart yearns for based on affection, characteristics defining attraction, to achieve oneness at
particle level, the sheer eloquence is consuming, entwining soul vividness leaves seering impression,
imagining the fundamentals, the elemenals, like electrons, emotions accumulating yearning force,
creating a single narrative motivation, brilliantly done di, this is pure romance, touching in intensity alone.

[KUFU]

You wrote:

"torturing me with your finger tips 'till I scream out
"just swallow me!", and I'll swallow you."

...cryptic. My mind will not allow this image to be heterosexual. If this was your intent, the attempt was a success. There are no context clues that would lead me to believe that this 'interlude' is between a male and a female. The gender-less nature of the piece...save a suggestive avatar...is good if yer attempting to appeal to both male and female readers; to arouse the psyche and the senses with a disambiquous poem is no easy task, but with:

"...where I can crash at the speed of light
unscathed, my catcher's mitt-oiled and well practiced."

...one (I certainly do) can only interpret this poem as homosexual, nothing wrong with that, but as a 'interlude', "Interlude" falls short of enthralling passion...whether it be same-sex or otherwise.
I would have like to have read a tender poem expressing love/lovemaking between two people. Yer like all hot and heavy, but the feelings elicited are not enough to get a rise out of me or my psyche. If yer gona get raw, get raw BIG! Make us titillate with a desire to be apart of such a moving poem. I think this is a mistake many writers/poets make, they hold back when they really feel like conveying explicit topics. This stifles the poet's/writer's creativity and the poem becomes...well, limp. Then there are those who want to express a more tender sentiment, but the message is never conveyed since the poem is never replete with the tendernesses and vulnerability prompts that often accompany ecstatic love/love making. Yer "Interlude" fall in the middle of this dynamic. You held back (why I don't know) and the work suffered for this indecision on yer part.
I really wanted to like this poem, but I feel let down.

[fireblossom]

Great writing. You have the ability to get out of the way so that your images flow to words to paper the way we all should communicate our deeply cherished feelings.

Jan

[Pamela A. Lamppa]

There is such intensity marking this moment, this between agony and ecstasy of love where all is quiet; silent and comforting. The landing place, the cared for spot, the "it doesn't matter what color or shape I am" spot - yes, this

interlude

where all is perfect in its imperfections - where love lives.

Wonderfully creative and intense. I loved it. ~Pamela

[Forest Green]

A beautiful eliptical equation that searches for the two sides to equal one another; through the toils and triumphs of love, what we seem to want to find is true equality of feeling and knowing and loving.

Very unique, emotion-charged work.

Daniel

[Emily B]

oh, my. . . the trepidation is deafening!

[Nan]

The impression is purely astral to me and bridges on the notion of having landed.
Your sketch is well rendered and seems minutely powered by physical sense, even
as the imagination gains it own touch with reality.
It's brilliant work, Di and I have to keep this one.

Love it,

Nan

[Jessica M.]

the first line is intoxicating.