Conflicting thoughts

 

For so long I’ve wished this was all a bad nightmare

That you hadn’t died, that we were still together

 

Now I’m scared of my wishes

Because I’m scared that if you came back

It would only be to die again

And I would have to go through all that again

 

I’ve made some progress

And I’m not sure I could deal with it again if I had to

 

Conflicting thoughts… that only I care about