Push The Air in My Lungs

this was writen in bits in peices but untill now i havent fixed them together and its just that feeling of hopelessness and wanting the feeling to subside

Why wont you push the air into my lungs

Wont you just help me breathe

Wont you just be by my side

Wont you just be my light

Be the hand out of the darkness

 

Help me breathe

Help me up

And be there for me

For I cant push on anymore

 

I feel my breath stopping

Wont you push thos life giving air into my lungs

Wont you just be my light

Just lend me your hand

Save me from this grave I have dug

Just be there for me

Because life’s to hard to do it alone

That’s why there’s more than one of us

Author's Note

give your opinion

Reviews

[Hollywood]

Thos needs an e, but the poem is good. It makes me think of the movie trainspotting when Brenton OD's on heroine, not sure if you know what I'm saying. I like your writing though.

[Deaths Cold Kiss]

another one of my faves ... this one is really good

[Micah_s5]

Hmm, I like this. Gives me an image of a paramedic performing CPR in the first part and then it gets into a more emotional than physical sense. Well transitioned from physical to emotion being.

[Una Xoto]

This is a very raw piece. It is something that can come from that wellspring of emotion & heart within us all. That is the core of this art which we all are here to cultivate. I would love to see this theme & piece expanded & meditated upon further. Nice writing.

[C. Rose]

I liked the piece. I also appreciate that you are raw and unedited in poetry, while some get caught in the details of editing, others remember that poetry needs to be emotional and from the soul to really connect to those reading it. You pull that off, so please don't try and "edit" your poems too much.

Your description is "just that feeling of hopelessness and wanting it to all be over", but I didn't feel the sense of "wanting it to be over" but more-so wanting a partner in the hopelessness. Your were screaming to breathe, not to die.

I enjoyed and look forward to taking time to read more. Keep sharing!

[Katie]

I loved this. It was such an honest and raw plea. You have great talent.