Long Road of Flames

my life on the road of being a musician

On a blazing road to nowhere

I ride my electric stallion

Through red hot flames

Fighting fire with my hot licks

In lay a few bad boys down

Causing the flames to soar

And these fires to roar

As I cut through them with my ax

Playing music so melodically

As I push through the fire

Unscathed by the flames

With music as my shield

I’ll never be hurt

It engulfs me like an aura

Pushing the flames back

For as long as I play

And for the music I will every day

For at the end of the road there is a light

Filled with fame, fortune, and my every delight

And with the flames of fame I’ll continue my fight

With music as my ax and my shield

I’ll never be stopped

On this long road of flames

Author's Note

i think this is one of my worst peices, opinions please

Reviews

[D.R. Wilsey Jr.]

I like the passion behind this, but to me it's repetitive to a fault.

[Katie]

This sound like a fun road to be on but sometimes flames go out so be careful. This is not a weak poem at all, the metaphores and rhyme are amazing.

[HorrorMaster]

I don't think so, I like it anyways.

[Charles]

Sounds like you're making some magic on the road. There's no inherent weakness to this poem (I don't know why you think it's one of your worst). The rhymes you include (see earlier review) are not consistent enough to say they are integral to the poem; they are there simply because they are there. I have trouble seeing anything as both ax and shield, though poetic license may carry that point. This next may be a musical reference (I don't know), but I don't understand the line "in lay a few bad boys down."' Keep strumming and writing.

[Vartul]

This is good.You've shown the fight,but i think you should've also included the love for music.Those beautiful hours spent in the shade of the acacia tree in the lawn,humming some unknown summer tune...
Something like that.Since you're a musician,you'll be able to express it better than me.Hey,why don't you compose a poem reliving those ethereal hours,when you were close to music...

[Moth Phoenix]

Well, I thought it was great. I really liked the little rhymes you added in there :]
Great write Austin!!