The Darkened Whirlpool (Version 2)

A whirling & mindful

World's downfall

Had spiraled

Empathetical dreams

Into an unknown realm

Of confused depletion 

Where menial minds

Could only survive off

Discretion alone

Left nothing behind

For their own souls to condone

The cycle convolution 

Had forever drained & postponed

Any signs of positivity

During the daylight hours of

The Darkened Whirlpool

Author's Note

Just (Version 2) of the original. All reviews welcome, thanks for stopping by & enjoy. :)

Reviews

[Jennie Baron]

Your revisions have definitely improved this poem, I believe.

[Jennie Baron]

Very nice in general. The only thing that struck me is that at first "leaving nothing left" perhaps sounded repetitive.