The Dentist

Augghhh! lol jk

As I lay on the stiff chair, A man walks into the room.

He smiles at me and walks behind the chair.

I hear the clinking of metal things as the man gets his torture ready.

I can see me heart pounding, trying to break out. I pat it down, which makes it worse.

The man comes around and says, "Now wait a moment, I'll be right back."

I nod, my brow soaked in perspiration, and the man walks out of the room.

He soon comes back into the room, followed by a little old lady in a ugly purple shirt.

They walk on either side of me and pick of a very large, metal toothpick.

They scrape at my teeth, and I scream in pain inside my head.

Once they are done with this, The man says to me,

"Now I'm going to give you a shot, okay? It'll help the with the pain."

I was really panicking now. A shot? What pain was I going to have to endure?

I closed my eyes, then opened them when I felt a sharp pain in my cheek.

I saw a needle being withdrawn, and the lady handing the man a very, very large drill.

He turned the drill on and brought the drill down, down, down, down, down...

I waited for the severe attack of pain, but nothing happened.

I smiled

 

Author's Note

I just thought of this as I was getting ready to go to the dentists... Any grammar mistakes or anything like that please.

Reviews

[Laminators Dubai]

omg...
you just renew my memory...

[Lauren Marie]

Haha, and then you get loopy!
This was a nice, short, scary story about the dentist.
Some things to look at: "puce shirt." Is puce some stange color that I'm just not aware of?
"pick of" should be "up."
Okay, instead of saying something like, "I was frightened," write, in effect, "sweat was pouring down my face, my hands were clammy, my eyes darted around the room, et cetera" so that we can -see- that your character is frightened, instead of just telling us. Show, not tell.
But, this was really good. I liked it, since I can relate -a lot.-
~Lauren

[Mandi]

then you at least need a period after 'I smiled'. you should say why you smiled too...

[Mandi]

how does it end? it just says. "I smiled"