DARKNESS RAINS

dark, black, pain, other world

Rain pours down on my broken core

my nerves pulsate from the soak

still I quiver, though I dry myself

in the warmth of the sun

darkness besieges within

as the world passes me by

my comfort lay in the blackness of the ocean

lifesaver that has its absence

only fleetingly

I find solace with sea creatures

they greet me with an enduring glance

no pretense in my sanctum

voices of my sphere

who empathize with my pain

and, as I exit for a time

I deem unsavory

the colors of the detached world, onerous

I totter after my soak, rattle with unease

my repose is dark, as I yield to the inkiness in peace

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I like how this can be taken as allegorical. I have done much snorkeling and there is something to be said about visiting that world and leaving the one we live in...it's fascination, invigorating...so beautiful.
But sometimes when things are the worst for us we may just dive into the pain instead of running away from it. And we might just find solace, some kind of peace there...we face the creatures that haunt our heart and soul...and somehow come to terms with how we feel.
j.

[Betty Hermelee]

Your review is lovely and in depth as usual, many thanks J

[Wórdsmíth]

Here.. i would agree w/ Mr. Cilberto's featured review... pretty to the point & well re-phrased in words.

[Betty Hermelee]

Thank you!

[Patricia Wedel]

dearest Betty... we are all searching for the
Peace that passeth understanding.. When I was
19 yrs old, I snow skied down mountains and through the woods...
the most peaceful exhilarating experience I have known.
It gave me a clear outlook to this day. So I can understand how
you find comfort in the darkness of the Ocean.
We are living in an extreme Universe, so we go to extreme
environments to find a way of sorting circumstances.
Wishing you a safe journey. tenderly, Pat

[barleygirl]

Sometimes writing about darkness can be another expression for depth of meaning or feeling. It doesn't always have to be some bleak ugly place that darkness represents. I love how you convey darkness, nicely creative & expressive, but this just doesn't sound to me like the soul-ripping kind of darkness. It feels more like it's a dark womb where one might go to seek protection or freedom to BE. I often feel I need to hide a fair amount of the way I am becuz people take me in a dark yukky way, as fear takes over. But their fear about me is not my problem. I don't like living out of fear & this poem has that strong core of feeling becuz this narrator isn't expressing darkness from a position of fear (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Betty Hermelee]

Mi Margie: you're absolutely correct; this darkness is a feeling of comfort, a sanctum, a place to be away from distractions, chaos and a place where one can be in free and in peace. I love your critique as always...XO, B

[Chris Shaw]

The ocean is another world. I have only been snorkelling once, but I remember how utterly awe inspiring it was. The feeling of being alone surrounded by fish of all colours and sizes weaving in and out of strange waving plant life. An escape. I think we all need a place to go to where we can find comfort when the going gets tough. These times we live in are tough. I travel the stars Betty.

Chris

[Betty Hermelee]

Hi Chris, thanks for a lovely review
best and stay safe, Betty

[Ladysue]

The ocean is a sanctuary. I haven’t gone snorkeling in quite some time but this poem brought me there. Another world of beauty with warmth, color and sea creatures that restore a sense of balance, peace and remind us that there is still goodness somewhere during these insane times. Profound write

[Betty Hermelee]

Thanks so much for a great review! Best, BETTY

[Dara]

There is something almost ethereal about the ocean. The vastness alone is awe inspiring. From your words the reader is quickly caught up in the depth of your emotions and aware of the calming effect it has on you. I have never had the pleasure of diving but know from experience how soothing it is just to sit by the shore listening to the waves. This is a very profound write filled with beautiful descriptions and insight.

[Betty Hermelee]

Thanks Dara for your kind review! Best,Betty