My Crumbling Mask

A mans carefully wrought facade begins to crumble, exposing his true self.

My Mask is beginning to crumble, exposing the truth beneath,

I can feel the cracks appear as if I stare into the broken mirror

The facade I have carefully maintained losing all its coherency.

Anxiety courses through my being, terrified by how people will

finally react to who I truly am, finally seeing my true self.

I hide behind my crumbling mask like an actor,

Never revealing my emotional state to anyone,

Neither friend nor family nor even to myself.

No one can know who I am for fear of hatred,

For fear of being exposed like an open wound.

Pieces are falling off, breaking like fine porcelain.

But it dawns on me that I can never mend this mask that I don,

The blood seeping throughout, the scars open for all to witness,

And I can never cover my face with the hands I have neglected.

It is too late to repair that which has long been breaking,

And I have to wonder, after all these years of deception...

Who am I?

Author's Note

Just read it and let me know what you think. Alessander unintentionally gave me the inspiration for this poem. Thanks Alessander. ;)

Reviews

[Lord of mad men]

This was a extremely pleasing read. I enjoyed it very much but I am in a state very similar to what you have depicted in this so my review is not the best but I wanted to express some form of respect and try to let you know this is very good. It speaks very deeply​ to me. My mask is not breaking and it's not coming off any time soon. Even those closest to me only know what I have all them to know. We all have a mask to wear we just choose weather to wear it or not. We choose if we define it or it defines us. Under the mask I wear I am changing for I do not yet Know who I am. Thank you very much for publishing this. Yours truly a mad Lord.

[Lovecraft]

Thank you. My mask/facade has some cracks in it but it has yet to crumble.

[Lord of mad men]

We always fear what others think but we fear what we think the most. Our own thoughts are what scares is the most. When the mask does crumble do not try​ to stop it. Remember there are those who only know the mask some might fear change but those people are who have kept the mask on. Be yourself or more then this mask may not be the only thing that crumbles in front of your very eyes.

[Giulia King]

I love this! It's so well written! I think we all have different masks in life.

[Lovecraft]

Thanks, Gullia. We all have Masks ready for certain occasions during Life and sometimes we can't hold them together.

[Giulia King]

That's so true!

[Alessander]

"No one can know who I am for fear of hatred,
For fear of being exposed like a raw wound

Pieces are falling off, breaking like porcelain."


Really vivid, and somewhat, horrible.

Also, I don't think I can take total credit for the mask theme

I think I may have mentioned T.S. Eliot "We must prepare a face for the faces that we meet"

Or Maybe it was an Xfile episode where moulder mentions "Melting mask of sanity"

Maybe. I get confused lol

But I liked this. I think we all can relate to having to put on a certain facade for family, coworkers, maybe even friends and lovers....

But beneath....

Really like that. It cuts to the core.

[Lovecraft]

Think American Psycho and Patrick Bateman's "Mask". He mentions it in the film and book.

read moreThink American Psycho and Patrick Bateman's "Mask". He mentions it in the film and book.

;)

[Alessander]

haha, of course Bateman! that's a given lol

[Lovecraft]

Yes, so you did inspire this poem in a certain way, so gain, thank you. ;)

[SleeplessVolcano]

All of us wear masks, don't we? Although it is hard, it could be a blessing in disguise when those masks come off.......

Great poetry...

[Lovecraft]

Thank you. :)

[Tony Jordan]

This makes me think. Trying to recall the moment the first layer of mask was applied. When? Why?

Losing it feels like losing our Self but perhaps it's the best thing. Other's masks will become more obvious to us.
We will see who we are finally and feel freer.

Also as we age, others opinion of us matter less. Perhaps we might even be happy in our own skin.
Top write Lc.

[Lovecraft]

Thank you, though sometimes the mask can be far preferable to our true selves in certain situations. ;)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Don't we all wear masks? To hide ourselves from the cruel eyes of the world? But we've been wearing it for so long that we forget our true selves.. confused that which one is the real us...

This is a great piece, quite relatable and powerful too!

Good work, Lovecraft! :)

[Lovecraft]

Thank you very much. Truth be told, I was partly inspired by a passage from the novel American Psycho. ;)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

I'm not aware of that particular novel 😛
You're welcome! ☺

[Lovecraft]

It's an amazing book but extremely violent, gory and sexual. It's also very sick and I would advise you not to read it as it would likely sicken you, lol. :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Those 3 qualities are what make a novel an interesting read for me 😉
Tell me the authors' name and I'll be sure to check it out 😎 now that you have asked me not to haha 😂

[Lovecraft]

Bret Easton Ellis. But I must warn you, there is rape, dismemberment, murder, necrophilia, cannibalism, sexual torture and far worse in it. Much of the violence is also directed toward Women in general. Beware. ;)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Err.. You stopped me dead in my tracks.. I didn't think sexual covered rape lol.. I'll have to think about reading that one 😛

[Lovecraft]

It's a great book with great themes showcasing the excess of the 1980's and a loss of identity in a yuppie world but it is the most disturbing book I have ever had the good fortune to read. I'd suggest you wikipedia it before you consider reading it. Yet somehow I still love that book and consider it a classic. :X

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Yes I already did! Read the summary 😉
I'm def gonna read this one! Thank you ☺

[Lovecraft]

Just remember to read between the lines for the important themes and don't take what you read too seriously as it is meant to be ridiculous in many ways. :)

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Oh yes of course! Although I'm sure I'll end up hating the main lead 😛

[Lovecraft]

You most certainly will, but I somehow found the smallest bit of sympathy for Patrick Bateman at the end despite his actions. :(

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Well maybe because you're a man that's why 😉
Men find ways to justify the actions of their own kind 😛

[Lovecraft]

I don't believe it is because I'm a guy. I'm no misogynist. ;)

I do happen to know a few chicks who love the book and even like the character of Patrick Bateman, lol.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hah well I'll reserve my judgement on this one then, Mr. Lovecraft 😉

[Lovecraft]

Watch the film first. If the film disturbs you DO NOT READ THE BOOK. :D

[Dr. YumnaKay]

Hahah I'm good with the imagination stuff as well! Don't think I can bear the visuals 😉