It's Okay

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What was it I had said.

So long ago, I hardly remember.

And what did you say,

You’re a terrible pretender?

Just yesterday I said,

It never really mattered.

That what’s up ahead,

We both lay battered.

 

So I’m telling you,

If you never see straight.

I’d never walk again.

Or hear just right.

And without a fight,

I might just run,

And keep on going to another world,

Without you in it.

But what’s to say,

That’s the only way.

I can still see through to the other side.

So please don’t hide,

I want you in it.

 

So come home with me,

Just tonight.

Finish what we started,

To be polite.

I’ll hold your door,

And you’ll ask for more.

And I’ll just nod,

And say okay.

Reviews

[Marie Harrison]

You really made yourself vulnerable in this poem
I love that!
Accepting someone for where they are by saying "It's okay."

[Coyote Poetry]

I like this poem. The flow and story is very good. Hard to open the door sometime. To open or break down doors can make us afraid. I like the positive ending. A excellent poem.
Coyote

What I enjoyed:

1) The conversational tone. Very accessible.
2) "And keep on going to another world," Surprises the reader.
3) "I want you in it." This type of honesty is very poetic.

What could change:

1) "You’re a terrible pretender?" I'm not really feeling this question mark. It seems like it would better as a period.
2) "So I’m telling you,
If you never see straight.
I’d never walk again." The transition from the second line to the third seems broken because of the period. Maybe a comma is better here.
3) "And keep on going to another world,
Without you in it." There's something about the length of these two lines that conflict with each other.