The missing pieces

Fragrance of what we were do appear. I looked into the mirror. The once warrior had become the house plant. This is sad.

                                Missing pieces

On paper with black ink and thoughts. I try to replay the days of drunken bliss and delight.

Today like a worn-out cushion. I wait for no-one.

When age was my wealth. I wouldn't ransom for soul for a few dollars and safety in old age.

Today I'm barren in hope and dreams. I try to re-kindle hope and the energy of my youth.

I can't find the pieces of what I was.

When I was young. I didn't want to get old. 39 years and leave the tire body was my goal.

Today 55 years had led me to a dead-end. I asked myself. What have you done? Did you make

the world better or worst?

My father fought in war. He saw many good friends die. He drank himself to a early  death.

The booze and the war slowly killed him. I went to war. I hate war now.  Like my father. I stood by gravestones of good friends and held regret only. Did I do anything for the cause of peace and calm?

I wonder if old men must swim in remorse and black memory?  Today I go forward for kids

and family. I walk on a delicate balance. Once I was going to save the world. Today I'm trying

to save myself. I wonder when the kids don't need me. What will be left?

The missing pieces cannot be found. I'm ragged and tired. I wrote a 100,000 words for peace.

I did my best. I'm not searching for heaven. Heaven is for the angels among us. I didn't desire to

be forgiven. I believe we must pay for all sins. Better to had lived a good life than keep repenting for

actions done without no concern.

Today I sit alone with coffee and thoughts. I will keep living. I won't dwell in the mistakes of the past.

Maybe my words can expand.

"This is One people and one planet." The earth is getting smaller. We must work together. Send medicine, food

and water. Open the doors to peace. Gun and bombs don't care if you are white or black. Brown or red. People who speak of nuclear war. They don't understand. The lucky one's will die quickly. The people near will die a terrible death. A 160 mile kill zone in the end.

Brother peace and Sister love is rarely spoke. Words of hate and war are spoken without thoughts. I wonder

do the leaders of our world understand.  

  

   When the war is far away. You cannot feel the pain and suffering of the great cities and the poor people

in the way of war. The war will find you. If you accept war as a norm. Do you want your child to be standing

with rifle in hand in faraway places dying for people who don't want our help? 

If you sell or give guns to countries in revolution. You are part of the murder and killing. Countries who sell gun to terrorist and countries in turmoil.  Are we helping or a big part of the problem?

USA spend 40 percent of budget on war. They is no war. USA gave away close to 40 billion dollars in guns and bullets away for free to countries who are struggling. To create havoc and kill.

I pray for better days. I pray for the sake of children everywhere in the world. Peace, peace my friend, the sweetest words we can speak. War, enough of war. Allowed the kids to grow-up without blood and fear.

                                           Coyote/John Castellenas

 

+

USA Military defense               -

2011-768.2

2012-737.5

2013-675.8

2014-665.0

2015-671.9

2016-679.8 billions

Author's Note

Just words and thoughts. I hope you enjoy.

Reviews

[Ghost of Jupiter]

Wow, Coyote, I am dumbfounded... you seemed to capture the missing pieces in one's life... heart and soul... and the missing pieces of nations and society as a whole. Although different in many ways, i see such a similarity of thought that I have been swimming in, of late. The depth of all the topics covered here and the words you chose to portray it all.. is quite beautiful. What a wonderfully thought provoking write!

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you K. I followed my father to war. My father followed his father to war. I do not want my child or grandchild to fight in wars. I wish our leaders knew history and conversation. There is no winners in war.

[Ghost of Jupiter]

There isn't any winners, indeed you are correct in saying that! You seem to have a first hand knowledge of the horrors it brings to a nation, and a soul... my heart goes out to you.

[Coyote Poetry]

I went to many good friends funeral. War didn't effect me. Bringing soldiers home wrapped in flags made me learn. I learn great sadness than. War takes the best from us. No-one win in war except big business.

[Pryde Foltz]

I pray for better days. I pray for the sake of children everywhere in the world. Peace, peace my friend, the sweetest words we can speak. War, enough of war. Allowed the kids to grow-up without blood and fear.

You do not pray alone, my friend. I like to think that every word written in peace is one less bullet fired in war. We must just keep convincing. Thank you for this write, Coyote.

[Coyote Poetry]

I keep trying. People had accept war till one day. A child is brought home in a body bag. Then too late they take a stand against war. This is the sad truth of this world. Thank you for reading and the comment.

[Pryde Foltz]

For me Coyote the truth came a lot sooner. We are making progress. I truly believe that.

[Benita-Staebell M - Kin..]

Wow speechless and in tears.

I think of my Son he wants to
go into the Navy like his Paw paw
my father in law and My Grandpa was also
in the Armed air Forces
and lived no longer alive passed away of Bladder
cancer at 79 one of my Hero's and Inspirations.


Thank you for Sharing. Blessings Kindred poet

[Coyote Poetry]

I watched my three best friends from my time in the service come home wrapped in flags. I was a fearless soldier till I had to stand with children and parent. They were braver and stronger than me. Took me 4 years and to visit many graves to grasp. I'm tire of war. Thank you for reading and the comment. When I was young. I thought the military life was a good one. I still do. Soldiers support defend borders. Not play policemen.

[Benita-Staebell M - KindredPoet]

You're very welcome. Blessings Kindred poet