Trying to lose your memory

Old poetry written in 1992

                       Trying to lose your memory

I tried to find peace and calm in the coffee houses of Monterey, drinking strong coffee and reading dead-end poetry at the nightly poetry readings. I thought I was safe. 2500 miles from your memory. I sat in the Irish Taverns drinking the strong whiskey and heavy beer trying to erase your face from my heart and memory. Even the ocean beauty and power left me wishing to have you near and hear your voice again.

I left California. Landed in Reno. I played the tables and I drank the free drinks. There are beautiful woman near me. Auburn hair and blue eyes made me feel weak, brought  back  old nightmares of never knowing peace.

I left Reno and I went to New York city. I wrote poetry all day and waited for the dark. I like the New York city night life. They asked no questions and allowed the night to take you to better places if you are lucky. They left a man seeking reason and purpose to his own demised. The bar Poets told me. Ain't no peace or answers in the whiskey glass or dead-ends roads. You must face the demons and move on. We drank and sang the old songs.

"Ain't no sunshine when you are gone. Ain't no sunshine when she is away."

I went back to Michigan. I waited for you on your porch. You saw me and ran to me. Wrapped your arms around me. You told me. Where you been baby? You didn't call. I thought bad things happen to you. I tried to find you.
Everyone said you went mad.

I told her. I thought you didn't need me anymore. I was drowning in sadness, trying to kill your memory off with booze and beer. It didn't work. I have landed a stranger upon your steps, hoping for a second chance.

Sweet Jenny kissed me once than twice. She whispered. Life is a circle of pain and joy. We must try to find tenderness and laughter. You were my savior once. Please allow me to save you. Please come into my home and we can find the place where love can grow.

                                  Coyote/John Castellenas
                                 Written in 1992

Author's Note

A old poem with a re-write

Reviews

[Briana O'Connor]

This is a very fluid rendition of love, loss and discovery. I loved the pace, the sense of loneliness and the finding of hope. One thing I would recommend is to put quotes around the speaking parts. Although it is implied that someone is speaking, it is still a bit confusing. Thank you for sharing

[Coyote Poetry]

I will re-edit. I do appreciate the help. Thank you for reading and the comment.

[Lyn Anderson]

This is simply gorgeous. These wonderfully woven tales of love and life are why I felt compelled to write of your poems.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you dear friend. I miss my days of traveling. Good to be able to roam and learn.

[Pryde Foltz]

The bar Poets told me. Ain't no peace or answers in the whiskey glass or dead-ends roads. You must face the demons and move on. We drank and sang the old songs.

One wonders do we fall further into love or into the glass when heartbroken. A very wonderful write, Coyote.

[Coyote Poetry]

Whiskey make you forget for a minute. Ain't enough whiskey to kill all the memories. Thank you Pryde for reading and the comment. I do appreciate.

[Christopher Staab]

Honestly so relatble to me my friend. I went cross country via grey hound from Philly to L.A. I'm a bar hound, love them, and just want to say this is great.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Christopher. Good to travel. Being a bar hound is okay for a time. Good story and people to meet in the taverns.

[Shadows Ember]

I usually don't read stuff unless it is short or at least formatted, my mind is often times that of a squirrel as my friend would lovingly say, but I enjoyed this piece. The story to it is excellently done and the theme was not quite what I expected - I liked the surprise. The way you did this is interesting, but I really like it. Even though it is lacking form it still has a nice flow and it leaves an impact. I like that this was able to make me smile instead of break my heart as most of the pieces I am finding lately tend to do. Anyway, awesomely penned.

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Ember. Sometime love can find a good ending. It can be near and we are blinded.

[Shadows Ember]

Precisely. I just hope my story has a fairytale end.

[Coyote Poetry]

It didn't. But we tried three times. I was a Soldier and she wanted home. Sometimes things are not support to happen.

[Shadows Ember]

I just hope mine will end well lol

[Coyote Poetry]

Just be kind and gentle. Love need forgiveness and accepting the good and the bad. Real love survive the good and the bad days.

[Shadows Ember]

We have survived so far. So maybe there is hope.

[MsJewel]

I adore a love story with a happy ending. Thank you for the smile today!

:) Julie

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you Julie for reading and the comment. I do appreciate.

[B.J]

Very clever enjoyed reading your work.. I enjoyed the expanse of your story

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you. Good to travel. Clean the bad thoughts away and make you know what you truly need.

[B.J]

It certainly does, I moved around for a few years before finding my feet and settling. I had to clear my head and make room for a new world.

[Cascara (aka Sprint Goe..]

Gloomy yet hopeful..yep, the idea of being loved by someone 24/7 will bring happiness to anyone one in the world. Like I mentioned in an earlier review, I can see this poem as an excerpt from a contemporary love novel. Pleasure to read.

[Coyote Poetry]

Maybe one day. A love novel? I believe men are poor writers of the stories of love. Thank you for reading the the comment.

[Cascara (aka Sprint Goes Cascading!)]

"I believe men are poor writers of the stories of love." I've never heard that comment before. Why do you say that?

And btw, you're welcome :)

[DIVYA]

We do become unsure of ourselves and the people we love sometimes. ll is well that ends well. So long as we get back our reassurance. I loved the happy ending.

[Coyote Poetry]

Almost. We tried three times. I wanted everything and she wanted home. Decision made in youth leave you wishing your had wisdom that was learned too late. Thank you Divya for reading and the comment.

[Baby Ricochet]

This reminds me of Jack Kerouac. Just call someone a saint and you got it

[Coyote Poetry]

Thank you. Jack Kerouac loved the road too. Good place to study life.