Square Imperfections

Let's build a box.

Just a simple box large enough

For two people.

I'll ask you what we need

And you respond:

"All we need is each other."

So we build the box

With nothing inside.

It's frame is perfect,

But I know that it may leak one day

Under the heavy rain.

I predict a storm,

And so do you.

It's an inevitable occurrence

As the box lay in a grassy field

--slumberous trees at the horizon--

Sinking within the earth year by year.

You need light?

I cut a square hole

And a sheet of perfectly clear glass

Shields us from the weather,

--but we know the storm is coming--

I know the glass will not always remain clear,

But with a sheer of cloth,

I'll wipe it clean--from time to time.

And the box begins to sink

Like the heavy brick it is.

"One day, the door will not open,"

I tell you in pants.

"One day, the door will remain shut."

You breathe a soft breath.

And the trees grow larger.

They grown closer.

The grass grows higher.

And we begin to sink.

The window remains dirty.

The doors remain closed.

"Let's build a box,"

I tell you.

"Let's build a box in the sky."

Author's Note

This is a bit different and more stretched out than the typical subjects of my writing (my poetry anyways). I hope that maybe someone out there gets one of the many meanings behind it. Overall, do enjoy though!

--Christoph Poe

Reviews

[Mary Christabel George]

Yes it has many meanings depends on how the readers perceive it. As different people have different perceptions. All i feel is - This is about Love & the graph the love life goes through. With Box, Storm, glass, grass used as references from real life. Wish all get some one really special to build the box, live in it, cherish it & be there till its in sky.
I might be wrong in the understanding of it.
But,I thoroughly enjoyed reading it.
:)

[Christoph Poe]

Actually, you pretty much hit that nail dead on the head! :D I'm happy to hear that you understood it--and felt it, it seems. Thank you for reading! :)

--Christoph Poe

[Mary Christabel George]

You are welcome.
:)

[Anjelica Allen]

I'm not completely sure what this poem is going for. Normally I hate that in poetry. It tends to piss me off, but I think that you've executed it fairly well. I did find meaning behind it for myself, and I can appreciate a poem that does that.

What I got out of it was a relationship. In the beginning it was all hopeful and overly optimistic. The line "All we need is each other" shows that. The looming storms and the trees might be metaphors for relationship issues/differences or hardships in life? I like that idea a lot.
Your poems tend to fool me into thinking they have some iambic scheme. This one was the same. I figured out around line seven it wasn't meant to be metered.
I was like, "Oh dimeter, tetrameter, dimeter, trimeter could be a meter scheme I suppose. Like the waves of life I guess," but it seems I was wrong. Not that you need meter. I think it's fine without it.

"I tell you in pants." is a weak line in my opinion. I think phrasing it slightly differently would make the poem stronger. I'm not sure exactly how to do that. Maybe it's just me.
"You breathe a soft breath." is really strong. I loved that line. It feels slightly defeated, yet somehow lovely.

This poem has a lot of images of growth and moving through life. I really enjoyed it.

[The dark story]

well i should say it is great...the emotions of love and promises resally makes it Nice piece of writing...pardon me for i am so stupid but i think it is about the realtionship shared between two people and it signifies their love and solicitude for each other...

[Jamie Cook]

*gasps madly.....and squeals* Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! That was too cute! Ohmygawd this was an awesome poem dude! Like beautiful! Awwe can't stop squealing :D

[Kawaiikitty96]

I had trouble interpreting it, but the rhythm was awesome! I love it!

[Louise-Charlotte]

Oh how wonderful. I love the image you use and the simplicity of your poem. Its truth resonates.

[Nithin Purple]

ya good")

[Deron Alexis]

this is beautiful really very deep seated devotion tenderness care every thing a love poem needs really you did good

[written in blood]

this imagery is so profound, I almost had to gasp!! nice work!

[Pete Langley]

All the best relationships rely on a box. It`s a bastion against all the outside influences that try to invade. I think you have produced an insightfu, tender love poem with an original perspective, Chris. Well done, mate. P.

[Christoph Poe]

Thanks! I was really hoping the messages weren't going to come across because of my weakness of high obscurity. (That could be worded better?) But anyways, thank you for reading! :)

--Christoph Poe