Dear Depression,

I used to think you helped me, made me feel safer. Its like you were my shadow, went with me wherever I may have gone. I would walk through the streets trusting everyone, and listened to you when you said to let go. I thought that by doing this, it would make me happy, keeping my heart from breaking. We had fun, the two of us. Just us in my room, letting no one else in. not being out with the family, just sleeping all day. Making excuses why I couldn’t go outside. I thought that was all i needed was you, because you kept me from losing myself, and just breaking down.

When I met a couple people that I wanted to stay in my life, and you pushed them away, i knew something was wrong. From then on out, I started being clingy, and trying to keep people to stay with me, and by my side. but that made them want to leave even more. They thought I was crazy, like I belonged in the mental hospital. But you did this to me.

So when I recently lost someone really important to me because of my hard grip, I knew you had to go, that this had to stop.  It was okay at first, because I thought you were protecting me. The long nights in the dark, they weren’t us having fun. You manipulated me into shutting people out, to slamming the door in their face. I don’t want this life for me anymore, of not having anyone around. You made me act so much crazier than I actually am. I’m afraid of the smallest things like asking my own mother for personal items. I can’t even pass a class that involves talking, because all I have ever known was being locked away, hiding in my room. I am so desperate to keep people in my life, that I let them think it's okay to treat me like crap and do whatever they want.

I need you to leave. I’m telling you to leave. Things need to change now! I don't need you, nobody needs you. I’m demanding you to get out of my life. You’re no good. You’re just poison to everybody's mind. You might have “helped” in the beginning, but in reality, you just made me weak. Today, I am going to be strong. I am going to be strong without you in my life. I am kicking you out; for good. There is no coming back and manipulating me anymore. This is me saying goodbye, forever.