The Mother You Deserve

A mother and son's psychological exchange.

Mommy,
Why is Daddy so loud and angry
I get scared when I'm held down
Your face is wet, my skin is red
Please tell him to stop, Mommy!

But son, my feet are so heavy
I cannot get up and fight for you
Depression and Fear have me in their tendrils
I cannot be the mother you deserve

Mommy, 

I don't see you hug Daddy anymore
And I hear you fight when I'm in bed
What are all these boxes for
Is he going on a trip, Mommy?

My son, my words are so heavy
With this tongue, a union divided and torn
I swore you'd never have a broken family
Why can't I be the mother you deserve

Mommy, 

Daddy doesn't sleep here anymore
And the walls echo peace
I can fail and cry safely
I can be a child, Mommy!

But son, my heart is so heavy
I feel I gave you this darkened start
So long I kept you exposed to toxicity
I wish I was the mother you deserve

Mommy,

Smiling and laughing feels good
The monsters sometimes give me a break
I'm feeling more and more free
I love you so much, Mommy!

Oh son, my head is so heavy
I'm learning to allow me to shine
But the demons' whispers are filtering out
I'm trying to be the mother you deserve

Author's Note

Photo: https://www.flickr.com/photos/amypalko/2174315643/