Beating

I found this while looking through my older stories. I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote it, but it makes me laugh.

Edward McGee's heart broke down and he can't afford to fix it.

He plunges his arm through his chest, beyond his lungs, and uses his heart manually.

If he ever stops pumping his heart, he'll die.

He has four chairs in his living room. One's for rocking, one's for leaning back, one's for swiveling, and one's for sitting.

He usually sits in the sitting one, pumping his heart quietly. To get up means he has to pump his blood at a faster rate, and he's far too tired for that. Hasn't slept in many years.

All he is, all that's left of him, is a bloody hand pumping a broken heart.

Reviews

[lark]

Okay, so, I said that I was going to stop commenting, because it's basically been amounting to, "Wow," or, "I like this," or any number of useless jumble of words...

But...

Wow.
I like this.
(that was just for consistency's sake XP )

It reminds me of in my pre-nursing chemistry class (i'm not a nursing student; that was a clerical error), when my teacher was talking about how to replace the battery in a pacemaker was some pretty hefty maintenance (he was a funny guy. i'm not doing the story justice).

I like the bit about the chairs, even though you don't give us anything about the other three chairs.

I like that there is a chair -specifically- for swiveling (which firefox tells me is spelt only with one l; i would have guessed two...).

The last line is kind of perfect, kind of... bigger than the literal, and I like that. I like it I like it I like it (i hate saying that. i'm saying it too often. i thought i'd throw three of them in there for the hell of it... random outburst, sorry).

These points aren't coming from your pocket, and you don't actually have to read this, so I think I'll also say that you remind me a lot of this one writerguy, who I've shared with you before. You're more witty and less soft-spoken than he is, but . . . Lots of heart, man. I guess, that's all I can really say to describe it...