Would It Help?

I don't trust myself around anyone new. 

I don't trust myself not to hurt anyone else.

 I must have a talent-

how else would I have done it again 

and again 

and again 

And I've never known anyone else to do what I can do: 

a new friend

(the most amazing people were dropped into my lap) 

spark!? 

and linger 

 . 

 . 

.

for a sweet split second I'll hang in the air 

 . 

 . 

fear 

 . 

run.

every. single. time. 

Would it help if you knew I'm still sorry? 

Would it help if you knew I'm alone? 

Would it help you to know that I'm scared of my friends? 

I look back and I wonder 

each time

how did I do that? 

every single person-

Really, 

how did I do that?