If I Could Only Be the Storm

a thrice-abandoned poem

If I could only

Be the storm

In your skies tonight,

The rain that soaks

Your tender flesh,

The wind that

Caresses your face,

And the thunder

That speaks to your heart

In deep tones

Of adoration ...

I would be complete.

Jim Lonsdale Poetry 2006 / 2014 / 2026

Author's Note

"A poem is never finished, only abandoned." - Paul Valery

Reviews

[Michael Sun Bear]

A beautiful little love poem. And I love the quote from Paul Valery. So you abandoned this three times. The second and third times did you rewrite at all? I once wrote a poem Ferries in the Fog, I think I called it; I must have returned to that sucker a half dozen times before saying oh hell it’s finished, and published it here. I never did change a word nor add a single line. But other times I often rewrite.

[Desert Knave]

Thanks, I love the Valery quote and each time I re-posted this poem I have slightly altered / edited it ... as I will likely do again someday. Yeah, sometimes a poem just keeps asking for the changes. ~Jim

[Curly Grace]

A lovely, intimate piece the storm imagery turns longing into something soft and enveloping. The desire to surround, touch, and speak to the one you love gives the poem its gentle emotional pull.

[Desert Knave]

Thank you so much ! ~Jim