MAN WITH THE BALLOON

Just thoughts

A man walks off on the busy road alone

Last red of the distinct sky is far gone

Birds has come back to their nests

So he walks too,

With a single yellow balloon

Floating over his head.

Cradling his thoughts, he walks.

Weight of the day just gone

is pulling his shoulders down

Smile he hopes to see on his little girl's face

Lifts the balloon high.

You tell me what is life?

Reviews

[KalebMatthew]

Not sure if I should point out grammatical things (seeing as it is poetry prose), but I am going to do it because I don't know if the grammatical things were deliberate or not. Here it goes:

- The 'off on' in the first line is a bit confusing
- Should be 'birds have' instead of 'birds has'
- 'The Smile' instead of just 'Smile'

Those are some suggestions I had which might make it read more smoothly.
I also gotta say: Absolutely loved it! Emotive writing - such a sweet and sentimental passage, vividly painted. Wonderful.

[Unspoken poet]

if one only knew the meaning of life, This is wonderful

[Rye]

This is so sweet and wonderful, so very nicely written and creative

[Digvijay Singh]

Thank you for the read Rye

[Fairy Khan]

The simple pleasures of life!
Nicely written.

[Digvijay Singh]

Thank you Khurshid

[Vin]

These little things, when penned down- I would love to call these as poetry as this carves out a portion of life. I feel fortunate to have read this. Want to share this!

[Digvijay Singh]

Thanks for the words Vin

[Vin]

No mention. Keep conquering !

[Kelly Scheppers]

Balloons always make me smile, instant joy on a string that awakens us to what is most important in this life - like the smile on a little girl's face. That's life!

[Digvijay Singh]

Thank you for the read Kelly