A little poem

Rainbow, still domed

Smell of first rain, same

Garden grass

Winter's chill

Tulip's color

Same. 

Same.

Same.

Wind will gust clouds

from south ocean to east hills

And I'll dance with you again

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Your poem offers an idea that pretty nature talk is just "filler" for love poems . . . "same ole, same ole" as we say here. I feel this way about love poems (not my favorites). Sometimes there's a bunch of standard pretty imagery to paint a rosy picture, but in the end (as your last line suggests) there's only one burning thing on a lover's mind. So let's just get to the point -- only one thing puts zest back in his/her world -- one's missing dance partner! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Karmee]

Has a soothing feeling to it, this is good.. enjoyed the read

[Penlady]

I like the idea that there are parts of life that still do remain the same (yet different with each season) and the fact there are promises to remember! A rainbow! (Dancing again!) Thank you for this lovely little ray of hope!

[Lorry]

This feels like you were looking at a scene alone, that you used to see with someone else. Everything feels the same, yet there is an echo of loss, with hope you will find them again.
A very bittersweet image you paint with your words my friend.
I like the repetition of same. Some may hear anger or shouting in the repeating, but I feel it is said in a flat tone, letting us know that something in the scene isn't quite right, like someone missing, their echo.
Well penned.