Happy

I flashed a smile

when you weren't looking.

Wanted you to see

that I was happy

just for a moment.

If only I could smile

all the time,

only I can't seem to.

Why must something small

be so difficult?

Every moment I

feel numb, I beg

to remember your face.

I own every scar,

yet still can't be happy.

Baby, will you help

me be free from

such a haunting Hell?

It always hurts to say

I can't feel happy.

Author's Note

I wrote this simply cause I can't feel happy all the time, even when I have good days. It's like the 'happy feeling' never stays. My boyfriend sometimes can't understand why I'm not happy all the time and often I don't know why I'm not feeling that. It hurt to write this out and read it over, it brought tears to my eyes...but it tells so much truth.

Reviews

[Wolven]

Nobody can be happy all the time. Sometimes its an excess of certain chemicals or hormones that keep us feeling down despite all the smiles, no matter how contagious they are.
Not sure what advice to give other than to do things that make you happy (provided you want t be happy more), or if you need something more chemical, Chocolate is usually a good place to start. :)
Now. Poetry. Beautifully written, and is fairly plain what is going on. I like that you've written it in the style of a prayer, if that makes sense... Because its so shot there's actually very little that can be said about it, but that it resonates through to readers, all of whom must have had such feelings.

Wonderfully done Svetlana!