Epitaph

There is an order to mortality

ruled by etiquette and good behavior.

We write of our lives

knowing we must one day leave.

We write of our death

not knowing what lies ahead.

From the too-deep earth

to the drying-up river,

we are all only a few words away

from an epitaph.

Reviews

[Raef C. Boylan]

"There is an order to mortality
ruled by etiquette and good behavior." - put me in mind of the whole human species, queued up on a conveyor belt, politely waiting their turn to die. Also, the way in which we're expected not to mention it in so many circles...that destroys articulation on the subject, so that whenever we do try to approach death as a conversational topic, or even through art like you have here, we are out of practise and feel adrift. I don't think the social ideal can be achieved until every member has accepted the facts of their own inevitable end; life fulfillment seems an impossibility without this acceptance.
Yet, due to the rules of 'good behaviour', my statement is regarded as 'morbid'.

A really good write, Emily. It's so hard to capture mortality in language, and yet you've managed an essence of this in just a few lines. To echo W.K.K: "deceptively simple".
Poignant, inspiring and intriguing.

Thanks for posting this.

[Rachel Cooper]

This is stunning.

Thought provoking and moving.

[Angelic Darkness]

This is simple, and true. Most of us will have our lives
on a tombstone, but to me we our memories live the strongest.

AD

[The Dark Priest]

I first admit to choosing this piece as my first read because I seem to have a strange obsession with death. I am timelessly guilty for explaining how death and love hurt in almost the same ways. I say this to you now because of your obvious recognition of how we all really are but a mere few words away from an epitaph. Well written!
Write hard!
G.

[Kitty]

"we are all only a few words away
from an epitaph."

Oh WOW!!!! I absolutely LOVED reading this. Such a beautiful piece of free-flowing thoughts.

GREAT job!!!!!

Josie

[Gandré]

Hello Emily, I thought this was beautiful... I had to read again.

From the too-deep earth

to the drying-up river,------ i would like to have it if I wish a grave. but i won't have any. hmm fantastic artistry.

[Rc R. Vagilidad]

love the way you put mortality into such eloquent justification, it is so deep we must surpass the tenants of life, and eventually return to the homes of the depth, we will still be remembered, through ages, through immortality...and as our chapters close we live to our writings we left behind

[Deanarrlack]

i loved this. Originality isnt huge, but the way you conveyed it is huge. Kind of like ehh I dunno Mariah Carey doing a love song versus Leonard Cohen doing a love song. Good job :-)

[holly]

Your first line, all by itself, is superb. And "we are all only a few words away from an epitaph". The meaning and delivery really support each other.

[Tomás Ó C..]

Lets keep writing and make suretheres at least a dozen between us and it at all times... ;-)

[Emily Rose]

This is a marvelous sentiment expressed in impressively few words and quite eloquently to boot. What you say is very true, and you get your point across quite well - I can feel you wondering here.

One small critique, however: both times you use the word "of" it seems to disrupt the flow a little. Considering that it's such a small word and that you can count on your readers' minds to fill in the blanks, I'd recommend getting rid of your "ofs" to make the writing a little more compact and effective (not that it isn't both of those things already!)

Great job!