Old Mc Dougle

telling two animals apart can be a tough job.

Of all my five uncles, my uncle Mc Dougle, God rest his soul, is the one we love the best. His blue twinkling eyes and ever-present warm smile were his most striking features. He seemed to have a bottomless trove of treats for us, kids, whenever we visited him. Uncle Mc Dougle had a farm, and on that farm he had plenty of animals. When we were kids, we used to spend whole days playing in his farm. We loved to listen to the sheep baa and the cows moo and the horses neigh. 

Uncle Mc Dougle had worked all his life on that farm and knew everything that needed to be known about sowing, reaping, planting, trimming and raising animals. He was his own vet. He single-handedly helped his heifer calve, last Christmas. But with all his encyclopedic knowledge of animals, Uncle Mc Dougle had to swallow his pride, one day, and go to the local vet to help him with a particularly tricky problem. This is what happened.

 

Uncle Mc Dougle had two horses that he couldn’t tell apart. Sometimes he would take the same horse out to the field twice in the same day and leave the other one grinning in the stable and flipping his tail at the flies. But he gave the matter a great deal of thought and finally found the solution. He cut off a length of one of the horses’ tail. He was pleased with himself (Uncle Mc Dougle, not the horse) until, a month later, the cropped tail grew long again. Back to square one. Soon after, though, he had a brilliant idea. He took a sharp knife and snipped off the tip of one of the horses’ ear. Drastic, yes, but problem solved until, don’t you know it, the second horse had an accident and lost the tip of one of its ears. Out of his wits, he took the horses to the village’s veterinarian and begged him to help him sort it out. 

The wizened doctor gave the animals a long look, scratched his bald pate, snorted and wheezed then said: 

“Mmmmm, I see your dilemma, but there is a way to distinguish between them. See, if you put them side by side like so, you’ll notice that this black stallion is slightly taller than this white mare.” 

Reviews

[roarke]

Um... yeah, what he said.
E, you did a good job on the "Old MacDonald" children's song reboot. Then you created a good build up with the old boy's actions in solving his dilemma. The last sentence is a "double banger" in that it shows a simple physical solution AND the ridiculous condition of Old McDougals eyesight, so to speak. You are the master at comic juxtaposition.

[Woody]

God bless you, Bill. It's readers like you, with a wonderful sense of humour, that make me want to carry on doing what I do.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Lol.............That is so funny.You wrote this so well it had me going till the very last line.And what a last line it was.Brilliant my friend :)

[Lindsay G]

Oh my god. Wow. Oh, Uncle McDougle!

[Susanne]

Very good, had me laughing along with the story and love the twist in the tale...! Good play on words there...

[Woody]

most appreciated. you are too kind.

[Daffy]

Oh, No! Old MacDonald didn't know about boys and girls. He was a farmer, but could not tell a stallion from a mare....now that is black and white. !!!

[Woody]

haha just fooling around. incidentally, I was talking about my uncle Mc Dougle, not Mc Donald. similar but different :)