Need to Read

not a story. not a poem. what would YOU call it?

Books to read :

1. How to Lose Weight in Two Weeks. By Dr O. Beez

2. Overcome Your Incontinence. By I. P. Nitely

3. Children and Offensive Language. By Pr F. U. Asowl

4. Improve Your Eyesight Naturally. By Dr I. C. Knott

5. Learn to Stand by Your Opinion. By Pr U. R. Wright

6. Homophobia. By Pr R. U. Gueiy

7. Mental Health. By Dr M. knuts

Author's Note

the seven books most read after the Bible.

Reviews

[Shannon]

A series of extremely clever puns! I feel like this could be a list of characters for future story ideas.

[Woody]

I believe I wrote this at a time when inspiration for a story deserted me. glad you like them S. thanks a bunch.

[Moody]

Hahaha! Clever, dad.
I have a slight suggestion to change number 6, though. What about "Choose a sexual orientation", since the guy's name is a "question"?

[Woody]

thanks a lot Mood. that's certainly a possibility, ta. I can think of a plethora of titles for that one.
how about "Time to come out of the closet" or "Sex Change"

[Taylor]

What fun. I'd love to have a drink with you, Woody. It would be fun to sit and "people watch" with you and just enjoy your dry humor. Thanks for leaving a smile on my face.

[Woody]

thanks loads Taylor and I'd be elated to have that drink with the charming lady who hides behind that white lily? orchid?

[Taylor]

Sounds like a great clandestine meeting. Oh, too bad, there're so many miles between us! Incidentally, it's an orchid.

[Solar]

Tittering Titles...tee-hee

[Woody]

and the best thing about them is that they're real.
ta very much for dropping in.

[Nadia Gerassimenko]

I forgot if I ever commented on this, but this is awesome! Ingenious, brilliant, hilarious.

[Woody]

thank you so much Dear. I'm extatic you found this funny :)

[Troy Henson]

I will get right onto those as soon as i stop laughing out loud. Very clever my good friend.

[Woody]

hahaha do I smell sarcasm? Google them! thank you Troy. I'm elated this made you laugh.

[Stan Lee]

LOL... i am crying with laughter right now!! XD

[Woody]

Achh, I feel it's not my best but thank you very much Andronicus. apppreciate you stopping by.

[Stan Lee]

lol.. maybe not your best but very entertaining nonetheless. :D

[Woody]

thanks a lot Andronicus. glad to know you found it entertaining :)

[...]

HAHAHAHA Woody, you are so insanely creative!!!

[Woody]

aww thank you so much Lynn. thanks for popping in. I didn't think much of this little thing. it was something I wanted to try. glad it made you laugh :)
BTW. I checked on you on more than one occasion but found your account closed!!!!

[...]

it was for a bit woody. I question my writing ability at times and think Im gonna hang it up. lol

[Woody]

I think you're not doing yourself justice, lynn. you're a fine writer and this is as good a place as any if you ignore the bad lot and trolls and such.

[...]

you're sweet woody ty :)

[Gee]

Ornithology by Albert Ross
Stupidity by Richard head
Intercourse by Dick Dipper
Indian Rainwear by Mahatma Kote

[Woody]

hahaha so much funnier than mine.

[Gee]

Not at all Woody

[Woody]

Richard Head is a cracker :)

[Moonie]

Oh god, clever, clever, clever, you Mr. V.T.
lol, couldn't figure out a clever surname...

[Woody]

thank you very much. I think I'll use them in stories.
afraid I didn't get Mr. V.T.

[Moonie]

Mr. Witty... hehe, I suck at humour...

[Woody]

no you don't. The V threw me. you're one of my favourites :)