Life

what can I say? life's not fair.

Poor boy
Rich girl
Used toy
Moon pearls
Hunger rife
Gold plate
Each life
Is fate

Author's Note

well well well! lookee here! something not funny for a change!!!

trying to emulate Marie with this short-line poem. d'you think I should stick to the funny stuff?

(Marie suggested some changes)

Reviews

[Matching Socks]

I was not expecting this from you Woody.
I love when you surprise me with something different.
It shows just how talented and versatile you are.

Life is not fair. I think we both know this from experience, but it's life and so we rise to the challenge regardless of the plate we're holding. xx

[Woody]

between you and me and my dog's fleas, I was not feeling all that comfortable when I was writing this one. like a fish out of the aquarium. but yes life's a b....., we know that and we must make the best of it.
thanks a million Dear for your encouragement. x (one's enough. we don't want tongues to start wagging, do we?)

[Matching Socks]

True true, but an 'o' would have been quite alright.
You're welcome Woody. As funny as you are, when you get serious it always strikes the right chord.
Don't be shy about it.

[Woody]

O it is, then. :)

[Matching Socks]

: )

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Woody... Moon pearls are for
everyone! Stars twinkle for lovers
under moonbeams. A sweet and
endearing poem. truly, Pat

[Woody]

thank you so much Patricia (do you friends call you Pat?)
not my usual type of writing. that's what comes from rubbing shoulders with real poets :)

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Woody, my father's family was from Hungary.
He had an older brother and two older sisters who
we're born in Hungary. He was born in the USA.
My father could speak Hungarian also. They
had the last name Pantili, so an Utalian must have
Come across the border and settled in Hungary.
My friends call me Pat, but Patricia is a beautiful name.
truly, Pat

[Woody]

I knew a Patricia, once. her friends called her Trish.
yes Patricia is definitely a beautiful name. Patricia it is, then.

[Patricia Wedel]

My parents told me when I was two yrs
old they called me Trish, but when people
asked me my name, I said Trishie. So they all
proceeded to call me Tissie. Believe it or not,
all during grade school and high school, everyone
called me Tissie in school. But in my adult life I am
Patricia or Pat. My husband sometimes calls me Kid.
e.g. In the movie Clasablanca, he says, Here's looking at you kid!
Such is life...

[Woody]

nothing wrong with nicknames and diminutives. they're quite endearing and show a fair degree of intimacy and love. now, husbands are a different kettle of fish. you got off well with "kid".

[Mashoosh Kateb]

This is really good. Enjoyed it.

Last two lines stick out don't seem to be in the same theme as the above.

"Life less
Full Life" ...maybe?

[Woody]

thank you very much mate. glad you enjoyed this one. not my usual type of poetry :)
last two lines constitute a conclusion, don't you think?
your suggestion is interesting but it doesn't rhyme.
thanks again, Kateb

[Valentine]

Not your usual...the only thing I would change is the last line...to...its fate. Valentine

[Woody]

haha full of surprises, aren't I?
yes, I see what you mean. interesting change but then wouldn't I have to make it: "to" each life its fate?

[Gee]

Seems every body is giving this multiple reads Woody,well I've read it 217 times and it's fine by me,but,saying that I am an illegitimate uneducated!!!If you change it then it ain't yours,leave as is and take on board all of the clever folks suggestions for the next one.Take care

[Woody]

oh damn, Gee! I feel embarrassed. think I should go back to the original version?
I've always thought that the idea of joining the site and rubbing shoulders with the professionals was to learn and improve, take the advice of the seasoned poets.
next one, you say? I don't know when there'll be a next one as this is not my style. you know that.

[Gee]

Och,away an' boil yer heed(Scottish accent please)Woody my old mucker we are both borne from the non serious womb but we can still have a pop at serious.Now,I ain't saying we're gonna float to many boats,nether the less we can try and launch a couple!!!!

[Woody]

haha love your Scottish accent, lad. you're right we were born from the same womb (brother from another mother) but, hey, it's much more fun!!!

[Gee]

Lol,indeed it is..

[mattavelli]

Hi woody, seems she is a lot better off than him. Doesn't seem fair. Thanks for sharing.

[Woody]

Grazie Mattavelli. (your name sounds Italian) :)
yes that was the idea. true, nobody said life was fair.
thanks a lot my friend fr stopping by.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like this...the juxtaposition of the two..reminds me of the four seasons' song...Toy Soldier mixed with a little "i'll be a big man in town"---

many of those sixties songs where two people meet and fall in love but one is from the poor side of town and so they cannot be together.

[Woody]

yes jacob, I've seen a few movies and read stories of that kind. it's wonderful when love wins eventually.
thanks a lot jacob. glad you liked it.

[Marie]

I read this twice to understand what you were saying.And here's my take:
Poor boy
Rich girl
Used toy
Moon pearls
Black knife
Gold plate
Each life
Is fate

[Woody]

this is superb Marie. only one line I don't get: black knife!

[Marie]

I needed a word to rhyme with life. Maybe I can think of something better.

[Woody]

ok I'll change as you suggested and I'll use "rife" instead of knife. what d'you think?

[Marie]

Well, okay. Her's the thing. All the other lines are just two syllables; "hunger rife" is three. I can't think of anything better riht now. But it does contrast with "gold plate..."

[Woody]

if you read it right, you can make it sound like 2 syllables.

[Marie]

I guess so...at least I can't think of anything better.

[Gaston Villanueva]

Nice job Woody
I read it a couple of times and thought about how you said life's not fair and then restructured the last lines.
If you flop the last 4 lines to
Blissful fate
Wretched life
Life is great
Too much strife
It gives it a whole new meaning haha
Thanks for sharing Woody!

[Woody]

yes it gives it a new meaning but that's damn good, Gaston

thank you very much Gaston. glad you liked it.