My beauty

loving someone so much it hurts.

If perfect beauty yet had a name wish I would that I could whisper it, that I may run to beauty stroke its sweet lips, be blinded by beauty, my sanity they would question I’m not crazy I would chime, but fooled by beauty like so many before me and so many yet to come, wish that I would crawl from it like prey from predator, my wings would soar in that I was free but never shall. Torn from less misery I should hope if I away from beauty, but a pain as fierce as death should I feel fire in my soul, if I could not touch my perfect beauty, stroke its sweet lips and whisper to it. I would live and yet die, my sun would cease to rise, yet my heart should scream if I stay and my sanity I should lose, wish I could end my eternal night but even in heaven would seem hell if I could not have my perfect beauty.

Reviews

[Constance L. Hartwell]

to be perfectly frank, I felt it was all over the place; but that's the great thing about poetry. you don't need to follow rules or have structure. being sincere is the only requirement! as I read this poem I felt raw emotion stir up inside me. you captured the beauty of love quite well. you know, love CAN hurt; and when it hurts, it hurts like hell but sometimes it can be a good thing! like inspiration for great poetry. good job.

[Wildecat]

A magnificient piece of writing, a pleasure to read your poetry.

[Steve Thompson]

kool

[Ravenskald]

This is a beautiful piece of writing, the only neagative for me was the solid block of text.
If it was seperated into verses and stanzas it would be perfect !
As said below brilliant imagery and wonderful flow

~Raven

[kollaboratyve]

Very lovely and delicate-Good write! I see the thoughts process unfolding

[Mr. Deft Diction]

The wordplay and flow of this are magnificent. I'm diggin' your vibe.
Nice piece.

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

Very nice piece, beauty is what we see as beauty. Thanks for your entry in my contest and the best of luck to you.

[He@ther!]

All I can say is wow!:) A great piece with brilliant imagery:)