Melanchosmologia

A cosmic scratching of human frailty and the often inescapable sense of distance which exists between bodies in space. A little too vague, perhaps, to be an exploration, but a glance nevertheless.

Dark shades of crescent peak out
as sliver-straight-as-line amid
the chess-piece stalemate, order
amongst shapes of cube, growing
bramble-thick.

The Earth spins uncaringly

and we carry the body off to the
river, will she live? - has she
already left us to sprinkle desert
sands?

And little sister moon stands
ever-vigil and watches us as
the Earth spins uncaringly.

Spent in bridal bloomings, she,
once as before she reaches out,
she reaches out and hopes to
grasp at nothing. The hollowness
of space keeps her companion.

The Sun imparts a sinister smile
as his children reach hand: throat
for throat
and little sister moon stands
ever-vigil and watches us as
the Earth spins uncaringly.

Author's Note

I'm not certain about my choice of line-lengths here.

Is the 'she' in 2nd last stanza over repetitive?

Perhaps the subject matter too vague?

Reviews

[Anu Biswas]

Can you explain the meaning of this incredibly deep writing?

[Eudaimoniac]

I can try :) Being generally more attuned to narrative or essay writing, I find it hard sometimes to say exactly what my intent of meaning is in the case of poetry. But it is very important that the attempt is made, and I thank you for the interest.

What first springs to my mind is a juxtaposition of the untamed, dispassionate, uncaring element of the natural world (midnless space); and human/social convention - marriage, social relations (brother, sister etc.), politics (stalemate), gardens, etc.

I think my attempt is also to create a strange kind of sensitivity - a nihilism which is not tragic, a hollowness which keeps one companion, a nothingness that does not frighten nor send one into despair.

The repetitive (yet developmental) element is a formal aspect I really enjoyed using and feel that the contrast mentioned earlier developed out of a wish to show things - in a sense - repeating, yet being different in context at the same time.

If I may ask, did your interpretation differ from my own? I'd love to hear your take.