Uncovered

`




Belying this despised state

you hunch upon shuffling feet,

pondering the crunch of browned leaves.



Burrowing this dusty soil

you hide beneath scurrying paws,

forgetting the crash of billowy waves.



Blowing out raspy breath

you pucker withered lips;

release cotton-downed doves.



Bellowing against the horizon

you herd the flock from grazing;

shackled gates embrace nightfall.



`

Reviews

[Chris Shaw]

Hello Freds. Have read this poem several times. As Richard has stated, it brings much imagery. As to meaning, I felt here the lines were about someone who was not in a good place. You mention a despised state and the imagery of browned leaves and the decay of autumn all add to that conclusion. However I found some light. Releasing of doves, into freedom is so uplifting. I see this is an older write of yours and I was pleased to stop by today to read. All the best.

Chris

[redd Brick Keshner]

Thanks Chris. If one could sum up the look on Charles Ingalls' face after a long day/difficult season at the farm- that would be an approximation, in the least.
Freds.

[Chris]

I wanted to view your beginnings here - hence my presence. "Little House On The Prairie" reference you gave - suits this writing very well. Man (a general depiction) during and at the end of a day's work (regardless of the tasks required I also say) and the "stray" thoughts and images leaking out behind the eyes of their past, present, and likely future ...existence - during the efforts, flavor this piece. I liked it.

[redd Brick Keshner]

Oh this may be far away enough but I also had a previous account predating this one. Thanks for the much valued visit and much appreciated review🕊️🙏🏻

[Chris]

Provoking thoughts is what we do.

[Jimmy Crapped Corn]

When I read Chris Shaw's comments I realized for the first time, oh my God, these people are real, live poets. What the f--- did I think I was doing posting my writing here. But you all have helped me improve. Thank you

[redd Brick Keshner]

We all are developing and growing here but most importantly sharing that journey with like pilgrims so please feel free to interact and enjoy the trip!

[William Michael Reeves]

You are the approaching storm at night? Or the Shepard at the end if his life.

[redd Brick Keshner]

Either or Bill, it would seem. Thanks for reading.

[Richard🖌]

Frederick,

Some very unusual imagery was produced within my mind from each of your metaphoric lines and verses.
Though, to me, the entirety of this one is so abstract and ambiguous I'd never get it right, but I feel there might possibly be much that's native to your clime in this one that an olde bard from Texas would never figure out.
Still, it was fun and interesting trying … perhaps, you'll enlighten me and I'll read again with new eyes.

Beyond my humble insights! ⁓ Richard🖌

[redd Brick Keshner]

Oh, wow, Richard. This was written in the late 80s to the early 90's; also posted in several now defunct sites. Made its way here at the Café. I think I was experimenting on mixing metaphors that point to a person or state wherein they are disrobed in denial and confused, ultimately moving on and forward with a modicum of self acceptance and knowing self a bit more. Something like that. My memory of it is not as clear as it might be closer to the date of having written it. Frederick.

[redd Brick Keshner]

Thanks again. There is so much value in your much welcome words.🕊️🙏🏻 (JUN2025)

[Richard🖌]

Thanks, Frederick,
For the new insights on this abstractly interesting piece.
Here's one of my rare abstracts you might find interesting: New Day Gone........
writerscafe.org/writing/RichardJ/2848066/