Bursting

written 12/03/2015 and slightly tweeked on the date below ..i wish i could remember the inspiration please know there are no right or wrong ways to see this .. i hope you share your impressions

Share the bursting

trills and sustaining spices

                                     please  ......................................    

both sweet and sour....................

                     

                 Overwhelm 

me 

                      ....I will consume you.

melodies of institutes are

songs for forlorn loons

magnifying ...  

constituting ... 

(as if they couldn't sing for themselves)

                       weary           ...so damn weary

                       worn

                       and 

bursting  ............................ apart 

seams and scenes  

not meant for human beings

rant and wriggle dance to

shake free............ old tales ........... please!

in sophisticated skank .. 

E.

03/02/2017

Author's Note

Reviews

[Neville]

Like being caught in an explosion, or riding a bagatelle & not knowing where the next hit is coming from, or where the hell it's gonna strike ya... The original inspiration is now irrelevant, what matters, is there once was one and whatever it was, gave birth to 'Bursting'... Liked and liked a lot my friend ..... Neville

[Einstein Noodle]

i am particularly glad you found this one and brought me back to it by reviewing Neville ... you are right of course .. the inspiration's call is more than enough ...riding a bagatelle!! great expression my friend ...or knocking around inside a pin ball machine ;) so happy you liked the read ..actually its these kinds of expression that best suite me .. love and peace :)
E.

[Neville]

Peace & Love... are all we really need so back at ya my friend.... N

[barleygirl]

Ever since my old favorite film "On Golden Pond" I have loved art that brings to mind loons. Never lived or camped where I actually heard one, but their sound still echoes in my memory. Your poem shows us a balanced view including the "up" side and also the "down" side of this eerie lonely harkening bird . . . very thought-provoking! I like your original word choices.

[Einstein Noodle]

great movie!! i think you should make it a point to seek out a loon or two ... they will sing for you for sure .. one just has to be a little patient ;) thank you for taking time to read and review alwasy barleygirl!! like i said before, your avatar always brings a smile to me cranky face :)) yes..the word choices ..are you in particular referring to "skank" ?? it comes from my boyhood days when buddies hurdled and said horrible things about everything ;)top o' the mahrnin' to ya dear friend!
E.

[MsJewel]

Your words remind me of my father and the struggles he had living in nursing home - yet on Saturday nights, they had a dance - and he loved to dance. Alzheimers never took his dance moves away. Your words are filled with emotion. Really a great poem. Great work my friend. :) Julie

[Einstein Noodle]

thanks Jewels ... God bless your dad! ..so happy he still has the moves .. very precious of you to share about that ... your review is very encouraging to me ..love your insights to this poem ..its pretty open to interpretations ... i sometimes worry whether to give more concrete direction .. but never do ;}
E.

[emmajoy]

Read and read, thought and thought and maybe, only maybe, think this is more than a looking back on how life could have been different. Yet now, knowing full well that whatever the past held, retrospect can't alter a thing. We can only hang what might have happened or been said, only because we have time to ponder and choose.

' weary ... so damn weary
worn
and bursting ............................ apart '

Perhaps you were asking reviewers to create their own illusion of time, because memories thunder and linger in the air - perhaps

[Einstein Noodle]

absolutely emma! i really appreciate the time you took to read and read again ...i think that can be one of the most rewarding for writers .. i know this is pretty oblique ... and am grateful for your take on it .. love and peace dear friend ;)
E.

[Einstein Noodle]

ps. the lines you focus on are some deep felt emotions in this write.

[Ken Simm.]

We call them Divers over here. I wonder where that name Loon came from. Perhaps is was the eerie nature of their calls. There are obviously other meanings of that particular word and I am cognisant of the connections all the way through your amazing poem.
This is a sort of umami poem and that thought was prompted by your comment of sweet and sour. We the readers are aware of the problems facing the protagonist as he/she struggles to find somekind of solution within and because of experience, perhaps. An older persons experience and range of solutions. This is writing par excellence. But why expect anything less from you?

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you Ken ..you are very kind .. love the sensitive thorough read you have given this .. i am humbled and gratified to the max! thank you for taking time my friend!
E.

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

I like the feeling of reality in this poem that makes it all come to life, from the way you express yourself to how you do. It was a joy to read. Tyfs

[Einstein Noodle]

glad you found some good in this one Cyprian ..thank you for taking time ... most certainly a reality ;)
E.

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

You're most welcome

[Valentine]

Had to laugh as I though of the old times when me and my friends danced the night away. Shaking our bootie I think they called it. Gee, now you have me feeling OLD!!!!! Valentine

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahaha leave it to you to see some humor .. i wished i was not so shy as a young man ..i could hardly talk let alone dance with the ladies ;) what grand memories you do have of shakin' it baby! :))) thanks for taking time Valentine ..always appreciate your reviews
E.

[Lydia Shutter]

Emotions can overwhelm in a good way or a bad way. I see this as a tale of an older person forced to live in a nursing home. Not sure if this is what you were going for, but they are "not meant for human beings" and certainly the patients are forlorn. This poem is intensely emotional, E. Good one. Lydi**

[Einstein Noodle]

is it the "loons" that make you think of the old folks home? ;))) your take on this and relating it so is spot on in my opinion ..when i was in Nursing school i worked as an aide in a nursing home and they are never very fine places .. no matter what reputation they may have ..the caring people are over relied on and so many of the other staff are there because they can get no other job .. all are understaffed as well ..so those that care get easily burned out and leave :( thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts on this Lydia .. love and joy :)
E.

[Nidhi]

concept is different...nice presentation of words..👍

[Einstein Noodle]

nice to meet you Nidhi! i will stop by your place as well! thank you for the thumbs up .. the concept or theme is up for grabs ..no doubt about that ;) really appreciate your stopping to review ..
E.