Bashful

I look at you

and I want you.

I always want you.

Is that weird?

I've never done this before.

I don't know how to feel

because I've never felt before

You look at me

"Do you want me?"

I don't know.

I can't tell

I should kiss you

but we only embrace. 

Oh dear, I must control my pity.

I it that you are cold 

or that I am simply not warm enough.

Is it bad that I wish for such a clear sign

or is only that I am but a pride unable to understand how to take  affection. 

I am bashful.

I am Afraid. 

I am not sure when to kiss you. 

But it never seems to be the right time

You flit around it seems 

in a way that is beyond approach

but in a way that is mild with temptation.

I want you but I feel that you do want me. 

Has the pendulum swing the other way. 

From the days that you chased me so vigorously

It was not that I was unwilling

It was that I was unexperience.

It was because you belonged to another,

or so I thought. 

Do you simply stop because the lovers have inveresed 

or is it that you wish for me to take the upper hand.

To push as you have pushed.

To pull as you have pulled. 

Or is it that you have moved on. 

You do not pull away from my touch.

but you do not lean into it. 

Do I bore you?

I must. 

I am so bashful that I can not find the strength. 

to bridge the gap in between us. 

TO connect the physical the way we connect the emotional.

What is this feeling inside me that makes me so very shy.

What causes this fear?

When we do touch do I satisfy you?

I musn't

You are so worldly and I am so young.

I am a reed to your massive oak. 

You are filled with love as I am but you have carried it to such great lengths. 

I am awed at your beauty and strength. 

You satisfy me

but I must not satisfy you..

I try to

But it is a new wine in a old wineskin. 

Do you regret this?

You are a wonderful lover 

and I am a terrible one. 

I want to kiss you

I always  want to kiss you. 

To caress, to feel, to touch you. 

And you do not mind these advances it seems.

Verily, you are bold in your movements. 

While I move arthritis and unsure,

I wish to kiss you but you seem disinterested

or tired or intoxicated,

or worse interested in others. 

Do you hint?

Do you chide so subtle

or do you simple wish to leave this pablum affair.

or is this simple a bad time. 

an unfortunate set of events that prevents us. 

I am weak, I am pitiful.

But you chose me...

or Had me, or Tried, or Tasted, or Felt, or Wanted.

There was something that made you want to feel about me. 

the way I feel about you. 

I love the way you approach me 

the coyness of your words.

We became shy.

We became foolish. 

It was the first time I had kissed

and it was wonderful

and I want more. 

I want more but I am so bashful.